Parents of college students…

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:All I know is, ranking is part of the fit, because even if a school checks all the other boxes on paper but people think poorly of it or it’s ranked very low, it would change house you feel about the school, which is actually what fit is. Feel.

OP, please disregard the above interpretation of fit. The "feel" this PP is talking about is not what students are experiencing on campus. They aren't concerned about whether "people think poorly of it" or whatever. That is not at all what actual "fit" is. The PP above has fallen for the obsession, so prevalent on this board, with rankings and ratings by magazines. Student fit is about day to day life on campus and the academic fit for the individual student. Not whether some friend of mom or dad's turns up their nose when mom and dad say, "DC is at X College."

[Anonymous]

I think both my kids found their fit at very different colleges.

#1 we started with the regular recommendation of touring a range of big/small, urban/rural type schools (all in VA). DS came out of that 100% wanting a big rah-rah sports school in a college town. Liked both VT and JMU but the program for his desired major was much better at VT. Got into VT and been happy there.

For #2, she'd tagged along on those early tours, visited DS at VT, attended a short summer program at a LAC. From that exposure was really clear that she wanted a small school and liked rural/small town locations. Through the course of touring a bunch of rural LACs (and some strongly rejected drive-bys of more suburban/urban locations) she developed a pretty precise list of preferences -- needed enough of a town walkable to campus, wanted a symphony + pep band to continue music (but not a marching band), special resources for environmental science programs, no or light Greek life, a "reasonable" drive from home. Applied to a variety of schools, came down to two that were pretty close on the list of wants. 2nd visits to both gave her a very clear sense that the "vibe" was right at one and not right at the other. She's a sophomore and happy with her choice.

Rankings and "what others think of it" generally didn't come into the consideration set. I did provide the initial pool of schools for them to look at a screened first for a high retention rate and graduation rate which meant they were not looking at places way down in the rankings.

For the small LAC, the reputation within DD's specific field did matter and we talked with a couple people in the field who were familiar with it and spoke well of it. I don't really care what my neighbors think.

Despite being at "good fit" colleges, both found the freshman year adjustment difficult and didn't really find their footing and their people until late in freshman year, early sophomore. Still, throughout the adjustment they were still confident that they were at the right place. It's not going to feel perfect right off the bat for most kids. DD especially struggled first year but hit the ground running this year and we're barely hearing from her because she's found her people, is getting the academic support she needed (ADHD and resisted support in 1st year), and enjoys her classes.

[Anonymous]

We added 1-2 college walk throughs/visits on various vacations once DD turned 15ish. TBH, most were stabs in the dark: U of Boulder, College of the Atlantic, Barnard ...

After seeing a handful of schools, it was clear that urban schools felt right. Then, we focused on cities that seemed exciting and looked for options there. Finally, we started looking at cost. While we'd saved enough to fund 4y at any school, we told her the money could also be used as she wished (down payment for a flat, start up capital, grad school, etc).

In the end, she chose to drop all US university applications and focused on schools in Scotland (Edinburgh/Glasgow), London, and NL because they were so much more affordable. She got into 8/9 of her choices.

DD is currently 3 weeks into her first semester at University of Amsterdam and feels like she finally found heaven. As someone who identifies as LGBT, she couldn't have asked for a more welcoming city/university community. Her housing and campus is in science park, which is outside of the chaotic central area. The transition has been surprisingly smooth in spite of needing to jump through a lot of immigration steps that a US school would not have required.

As parents, we definitely took on some of the very early leg work of identifying some non-US options that had programs she might be interested in. And keeping track of deadlines for two (initially it was four!) really different country/school systems required a helping hand. But once we got a good tracking sheet up and running, she was able to do most of the actual applications and extra testing independently.

LSE, U of Edinburgh, and Leiden were all higher "ranked", but she only had a strong feeling of connection at Amsterdam, and it's been great to see her happy and confident with her choice.

[Anonymous]

If he substitute the word “reputation” for ranking, I still stand by the idea that ranking is part of the fit. I’m just saying it’s not the only part of the equation when people come to decide on colleges.

You should see the reaction I get when I tell people one of my kids is at a top 20 school, versus the other kid who is also doing great at a top 150 school. Very big difference, and I’m sure the kids can feel it. They will have that reputation thing to deal with the rest of their life after they choose a school. That is part of the fit— How do I feel about going to a lesser ranked school?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Fit for my kid meant being admitted to the honors college at a lower “ranked” public university, rather than squeaking into a higher status university. He is getting phenomenal resources and the benefits of the small program within a large school.

Can you share the name? No one will know. This is something I want my kid to consider.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My DC is at their dream school (thank goodness it worked out!). Fit for DC was big city, lots of stuff to do on campus and off campus, weather, friendly happy students, smart social and driven but not totally introverted or geeky. They would have been fine at any of their safeties and targets as well bc we picked schools of similar profile. I’m not sure how a student applies to 20 schools because at some point I think you’re chasing prestige or a name over real fit.

They apply yo 20 b/c they aren't sure of "fit". Or, their "fit" schools have low acceptance rates and they cast a wide net.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My daughter went to a large, chaotic high school and was very much seeking a quieter college experience. She noticed things like whether students seemed happy and friendly, and how well-spoken and welcoming the faculty seemed. Very happy at a mid-range SLAC. (Think rank between 50 and 100)

Mine is the opposite. They are at a large HS and rejected all SLACs b/c they didn't want to go somewhere with a smaller population than their HS.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If he substitute the word “reputation” for ranking, I still stand by the idea that ranking is part of the fit. I’m just saying it’s not the only part of the equation when people come to decide on colleges.

You should see the reaction I get when I tell people one of my kids is at a top 20 school, versus the other kid who is also doing great at a top 150 school. Very big difference, and I’m sure the kids can feel it. They will have that reputation thing to deal with the rest of their life after they choose a school. That is part of the fit— How do I feel about going to a lesser ranked school?

NO. Reputation is not related to fit. There is a reason the Stanford paper is called “A Fit Over Rankings.” Because they are two separate concepts.

Fit is not about how you feel when you tell people where you go to school. It is about how you feel on a Tuesday in November at college. Do you have friends. Do you feel connected with your professors. Are you involved in campus activities. Are you miserable and just slogging through because you want that degree or are you living your best life and thinking “this is soooo much better than high school.”

It’s how genuinely HAPPY is the student, not how SMUG is the student.