Bar/Bat Mitzvah Sweatshirts

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OK I never get to brag about this but I will on this anon message board. Woo hoo! People wear my kid’s sweatshirt everywhere. I see it on people I don’t know sometimes. It was not exclusionary because we invited everyone in her class. It does not have event details on it.

Wouldn’t that happen if it was donated to goodwill?

I think you may be overestimating the cache of thrifting for vintage bat mitzvah sweatshirts.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My kids are embarrassed to wear them after the event.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OK I never get to brag about this but I will on this anon message board. Woo hoo! People wear my kid’s sweatshirt everywhere. I see it on people I don’t know sometimes. It was not exclusionary because we invited everyone in her class. It does not have event details on it.

Does it have a date? We're doing initials in cool font with the date (in smaller font) and nothing else (so nothing like "Adam's Bat Mitzvah!"). I want it to be something people will actually wear (not everyone, but at least some!).

Every single sweatshirt or t-shirt I've seen from these has the date.

We went to bar mitzvah where there were high end sweatshirts and the kids picked their own graphics to screen print there. It did have a very small graphic with the kid of honors name hidden in it, but you had to really look to see it. Other than that, there was nothing about the venue or date, etc.. My kid wears it all the time.

[Anonymous]

My 9th grader still wears her favorites.

We didn’t give them away, for the same reasons other people have mentioned.

[Anonymous]

Egotistical junk.

Don't contribute to this epidemic.

[Anonymous]

Throw blanket is better than sweatshirt. But also, nothing is better than something in this department.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:They need to give you something for attending their gift grab.

Wow. Yuck. Bar/Bat Mitzvahs are incredibly important days for Jewish people. They are not gift grabs - gifts are definitely not expected!

yes they are gift grabs fool.

This is the mantra of the person who gives a gift worth far less than the per head cost of the banquet they attended.

[Anonymous]

My ds wears them all until they don’t fit. Haven’t had to buy a sweatshirt in years!

[Anonymous]

Wow, some of these responses.

DD is in 7th grade and is known for her "fits" lol. She is an athlete so there is a sporty streak to how she dresses.

She got a really cool hoodie from a Bat Mitzvah last year. She loves it and wears it all the time. Don't see her stopping anytime soon.

[Anonymous]

I find these threads pretty upsetting. In dcum-land if you invite everyone it’s a gift grab, if you invite less widely you are accused of excluding kids. If you give out a customized favor (which kids have done for decades), dcums are quick to judge it and call it trash and insist you shouldn’t have, even though if you didn’t you’d be the only one who didn’t provide a nice memento to your guests to remember the special milestone. It reeks of lots of judgement bordering on bigotry at times. An invitation is not a summons, you may accept or decline. If you receive a parting gift, like with any gift, you say thank you and then do what you wish with it, be it wearing or donating. Gently reminding people that these events involve a tremendous amount of work and preparation for the child and family and all of these gestures come from a good place.
To answer the OP’s question, my kids are not 8th graders yet but they totally wear the sweatshirts and ones I’ve gotten as a close family member also get worn for years with happy memories of that child’s day.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wow, some of these responses.

DD is in 7th grade and is known for her "fits" lol. She is an athlete so there is a sporty streak to how she dresses.

She got a really cool hoodie from a Bat Mitzvah last year. She loves it and wears it all the time. Don't see her stopping anytime soon.

Same as my DD. I can’t fathom parents here commenting that their kid would be “embarrassed” - so many rude comments.

If the hoodie is reasonably cool looking, my kid will absolutely wear it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:They need to give you something for attending their gift grab.

Wow. Yuck. Bar/Bat Mitzvahs are incredibly important days for Jewish people. They are not gift grabs - gifts are definitely not expected!

yes they are gift grabs fool.

This is the mantra of the person who gives a gift worth far less than the per head cost of the banquet they attended.

Cost per head, like cattle?

Gross

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:They need to give you something for attending their gift grab.

Wow. Yuck. Bar/Bat Mitzvahs are incredibly important days for Jewish people. They are not gift grabs - gifts are definitely not expected!

yes they are gift grabs fool.

This is the mantra of the person who gives a gift worth far less than the per head cost of the banquet they attended.

I'm sorry, but if you're expecting guests to pay you back, don't throw a damn banquet. So tacky.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I find these threads pretty upsetting. In dcum-land if you invite everyone it’s a gift grab, if you invite less widely you are accused of excluding kids. If you give out a customized favor (which kids have done for decades), dcums are quick to judge it and call it trash and insist you shouldn’t have, even though if you didn’t you’d be the only one who didn’t provide a nice memento to your guests to remember the special milestone. It reeks of lots of judgement bordering on bigotry at times. An invitation is not a summons, you may accept or decline. If you receive a parting gift, like with any gift, you say thank you and then do what you wish with it, be it wearing or donating. Gently reminding people that these events involve a tremendous amount of work and preparation for the child and family and all of these gestures come from a good place.
To answer the OP’s question, my kids are not 8th graders yet but they totally wear the sweatshirts and ones I’ve gotten as a close family member also get worn for years with happy memories of that child’s day.

Wow, this might be the most respectful and thoughtful response I've ever read on DCUM. Thank you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:They need to give you something for attending their gift grab.

Wow. Yuck. Bar/Bat Mitzvahs are incredibly important days for Jewish people. They are not gift grabs - gifts are definitely not expected!

yes they are gift grabs fool.

This is the mantra of the person who gives a gift worth far less than the per head cost of the banquet they attended.

I'm sorry, but if you're expecting guests to pay you back, don't throw a damn banquet. So tacky.

It is your choice to have an expensive party afterwards. Don't expect your guests to reimburse you through your kid.