Lakewood and Stone Mill Elementary - high % of Asians?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm moving to the DC area this year and in the market for a house in the Rockville/Potomac area. I'm curious about Lakewood and Stone Mill. The % of Asians at both is around 50% which is quite high, and I've heard there's a large Chinese community. Does anyone know whether it's mostly first generation immigrants? Asking as a 2nd generation Chinese American who mostly speaks English at home, and doesn't intend to foster the same type of academic intensity as 1st generation immigrants may be inclined to do (like my parents did with me).

Is there a reason to be dissuaded from moving into the school zone based on the demographics? I don't want to throw my kids into an overly competitive environment in elementary school. What are people's experiences who have kids who went here?

I hope this doesn't come across as racist or insensitive in any way...I'm genuinely wondering about how it might impact the school and my kid's experience. I have plenty of Asian friends, both first generation and not, but 50% just seems like a lot.

My opinion, don’t do it. The communities at these schools are a majority of first generation immigrants and at school events all parents talk to each other in Chinese. If you don’t speak Chinese fluently you will be left out.
I am a second generation south Asian parent and it’s difficult for me to talk with the Chinese parents bc they form there own “clique” at school events and chat groups and talk to each other in Chinese. For example, I was at one elementary school event and talking with a Asian parent who I though was friendly, her Asian friend came and they were totally ignoring me and rudely talk in Chinese in the middle of our conversation. It was very demeaning and quite shocking.
All The kids are all friendly with each other at school but I have noticed the Chinese community doesn’t really hang out or do play dates after school with other kids bc they are over schedules withMusic lessons or after school,academic classes. The kids also “miss” out on a lot of bday parties invites if the bday kid is not chinese , anyways these are my observation for the past 5 years. Please research further OP and make your own decisions.

+1

Agree most of the above is true. I am also 2nd generation Chinese but speak Cantonese and also excluded by those that speak Mandarin. They are congregate together at school functions and only speak Chinese. They usually don’t associate with non-Mandarin speakers. The immigrants are very cliquish. They are very competitive and have their kids in music, sports, Kumon and Chinese school on the weekends. Wootton is called Wonton for a reason. Very heavily Asian because at one point had reasonably priced real estate. To be honest, stay away from any school that feeds into a W school. Cutthroat!

I guess the most racist is second generation to first generation immigrants. Don’t you know their English is not great?

Maybe the 2nd Gen parents can lead the school's PTA and "mentor" the school's 2nd gen students if these students' 1st gen parents are incapable or unwilling to serve on the PTA? The children have assimilated and could use 2nd Gen adult leaders to assist and look up to. ?

Apparently the pp was complaining that 1st generation parents occupied the PTA functions and didn’t give her a chance. If most PTA volunteers are 1st generation parents, no wonder they speak only Chinese.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would not put my kids in that kind of environment, and I say this as an Asian American parent whose one kid went to a magnet program.

One DC wanted and needed an advanced magnet program; the other did not. I wanted to make sure that the one "not" did not feel so much pressure.

So, we chose the RM cluster. One DC did RMIB magnet (which is like 75%+ Asian); the other didn't. And even then, DC is taking lots of AP classes and feeling a bit of pressure. Don't want additional pressure.

RMIB is more of a pressure cooker than Wootton.

No, it is not. Not even close.
Wootton and Whitman take the cake when it comes to pressure cookers in the DMV.

[Anonymous]

RM and RMIB are different. RM is very diverse and not a pressure cooker. RMIB is heavily Asian an very competitive and cutthroat. It’s a pressure cooker.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:RM and RMIB are different. RM is very diverse and not a pressure cooker. RMIB is heavily Asian an very competitive and cutthroat. It’s a pressure cooker.

No. RMIB is rigorous, heavy but it's not a pressure cooker environment.

[Anonymous]

Anyone w/ mixed white/asian kids at these schools that can share their experience? Hoping my kids will fit in.

[Anonymous]

This is such a discriminatory post. These schools have higher percentages of first generation immigrant parents but it’s not 50%. There are many ethnic groups and they shouldn’t be stereotyped.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Anyone w/ mixed white/asian kids at these schools that can share their experience? Hoping my kids will fit in.

My kids are mixed and they are treated as white by immigrant parents even though my kids speak 2 Chinese dialects fluently. I don't think the kids really care. They will fit in. Most people in this area are nice and welcoming. Most kids in elementary school are fine. It's the parents who do not invite kids play dates. They are standoff-ish and it may be a language barrier. Group birthday parties are fine. My kid has been invited a few times and they are all Asian kids.

I am 2nd gen Asian (still speak native tongue and no accent) and the parents are cordial to me but I am not in the inner circle. it's cliquish. But there are other cliques too, Indian, Jewish, sports, etc. I am not included in the Lunar New Year get-togethers, they do not drop off moon cakes, and I am not part of the WeChat text group. etc. This is fine by me.

There are tons of mixed kids here. They will fit in. Once kids hit MS, there is less parent interaction anyway, and by HS, none, especially once kids are driving.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Anyone w/ mixed white/asian kids at these schools that can share their experience? Hoping my kids will fit in.

My kids are mixed and they are treated as white by immigrant parents even though my kids speak 2 Chinese dialects fluently. I don't think the kids really care. They will fit in. Most people in this area are nice and welcoming. Most kids in elementary school are fine. It's the parents who do not invite kids play dates. They are standoff-ish and it may be a language barrier. Group birthday parties are fine. My kid has been invited a few times and they are all Asian kids.

I am 2nd gen Asian (still speak native tongue and no accent) and the parents are cordial to me but I am not in the inner circle. it's cliquish. But there are other cliques too, Indian, Jewish, sports, etc. I am not included in the Lunar New Year get-togethers, they do not drop off moon cakes, and I am not part of the WeChat text group. etc. This is fine by me.

There are tons of mixed kids here. They will fit in. Once kids hit MS, there is less parent interaction anyway, and by HS, none, especially once kids are driving.

You make it sound like it's some weird exclusionary group that dominates the school when it is not.

It's just a normal sized group of friends who happen to have a lot of things in common. I have a number of parent friends who are 1st gen Chinese and they are not part of the WeChat either. Their child plays sports so they are more social with the sports parents since they are seeing each other every weekend every season for games.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would not put my kids in that kind of environment, and I say this as an Asian American parent whose one kid went to a magnet program.

One DC wanted and needed an advanced magnet program; the other did not. I wanted to make sure that the one "not" did not feel so much pressure.

So, we chose the RM cluster. One DC did RMIB magnet (which is like 75%+ Asian); the other didn't. And even then, DC is taking lots of AP classes and feeling a bit of pressure. Don't want additional pressure.

RMIB is more of a pressure cooker than Wootton.

No, it is not. Not even close.
Wootton and Whitman take the cake when it comes to pressure cookers in the DMV.

I am so tired of these stupid generalizations.

My kids went to W schools. They came out well educated humans.

If it's a "pressure cooker" that is from the parents of each individual family.

Not like the school says each student must take 12 AP's etc.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Don’t do it. My parents bought a home in a school district that was 86 percent Jewish and as a Catholic I was not invited to anything and left out. No bullying etc. just left out

Did you read the post?

She's Asian and considering moving to a majority Asian school district.

[Anonymous]

I am first generation, and I speak fluent Cantonese and okay mandarin. DH is 2nd generation, can s I feel many first generation

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Anyone w/ mixed white/asian kids at these schools that can share their experience? Hoping my kids will fit in.

My kids are mixed and they are treated as white by immigrant parents even though my kids speak 2 Chinese dialects fluently. I don't think the kids really care. They will fit in. Most people in this area are nice and welcoming. Most kids in elementary school are fine. It's the parents who do not invite kids play dates. They are standoff-ish and it may be a language barrier. Group birthday parties are fine. My kid has been invited a few times and they are all Asian kids.

I am 2nd gen Asian (still speak native tongue and no accent) and the parents are cordial to me but I am not in the inner circle. it's cliquish. But there are other cliques too, Indian, Jewish, sports, etc. I am not included in the Lunar New Year get-togethers, they do not drop off moon cakes, and I am not part of the WeChat text group. etc. This is fine by me.

There are tons of mixed kids here. They will fit in. Once kids hit MS, there is less parent interaction anyway, and by HS, none, especially once kids are driving.

You make it sound like it's some weird exclusionary group that dominates the school when it is not.

It's just a normal sized group of friends who happen to have a lot of things in common. I have a number of parent friends who are 1st gen Chinese and they are not part of the WeChat either. Their child plays sports so they are more social with the sports parents since they are seeing each other every weekend every season for games.

There are different texts groups (like whatsapp) of parents who do not invite others to join too. Not sure why wechat group is attacked here.

[Anonymous]

Different poster = DP.
always going to be groups. Go to a school that does not have one majority ethnic group, there you may see a cliquish group of PTA parents of all ethnicities who may seem standoffish too. they may not even know they are. One thing observed with mixed races, kid often isn't accepted by any of the races groups they belong to: blacks may feel kid is not black enough cuz other parent is vietnamese, and vietnamese not accepting cuz kid is "black".

[Anonymous]

So keeping in mind that I'm someone who actually really appreciates the high %age of Asians in the area ...

I'm a second generation Chinese parent of a child at Lakewood. I also grew up in the area and went to Wootton. My kids are mixed. My son loves it at Lakewood and doesn't seem to have any issues socially. There are A LOT of mixed Chinese families here, so being excluded doesn't really seem to be an issue? (And people fall all over themselves fawning over my toddler, who speaks perfect Mandarin. She attends a local Mandarin immersion daycare.)

CCACC (a Chinese community program) runs an afterschool program nearby, and there's a bus that takes the kids from Lakewood to CCACC. CCACC is open to everyone of all races, but it seems like most of the people there are Chinese. My son has lots of friends from different schools because of CCACC.

Academically? My family is actually quite relaxed. I don't really see academic intensity as being a concern, at least not at the elementary level. (I do remember my years at Wootton being intense, but that was self-driven.)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Folks,sometimes families don't have the time and energy to go out of their way to be friendly to you. Also cultural norms are differrnt than ours here. Being an immigrant carries its own challenges. those families may not even know they are being dismissive.

Make sure you remind people complaining that immigrants are excluded the same thing then.