First grade bullying - what would you do next

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, you need to do the “wait in the office until she sees me” move. Or better yet, your husband. Everyone at a school sits up straighter when a dad comes in. Sexist but true so use it to your advantage.

My DD was bullied in 1st and 3rd grade and the head of lower school (it was a private school) finally took notice when my husband went in. It was sexist and infuriating but the stereotype of moms overreacting and a situation being actually serious if dad goes in worked in our favor.

If this is a public school, make sure you have documented it to the teacher and the principal, and if the principal isn't reacting, then you need to escalate it to the superintendent- in writing. Schools have no motivation to take action until you document it in writing.

And personally I think "restorative recess" or any other form of restorative justice is not developmentally appropriate for 1st graders. You do not have to participate. When it was offered to our DD, it was clearly a sneaky way for school to avoid contacting some extremely difficult parents. She refused to participate and it forced school to discipline the bullies rather than make my DD responsible for reforming them.

My friend has a similar experience with her son. She is a SAHM and often at the school. School took matters more seriously when the husband came. It is so sexist!

[Anonymous]

It’s hard to see anyone being so mean even at such a young age. A lot of people putting effort on academic or activities for their kids forget about the basics, is to educate their kids to do the right thing, being kind and not to bully anyone, when their peers do the wrong thing know to not follow them. Do get principal, homeroom teacher, school counselor and also ask for A’s parents to get involved, or even the entire bully group. If you don’t stop bully right away, your DD could become the long term target when kids get used to bully her.

[Anonymous]

I think what happens is when the bullying event happens, the principal and teacher talk to the child and contact that child’s parents. When another occurrence happens, they do the same thing. Some kids are repeat offenders and frequent visitors to the principal’s office.

The school called me last and and again this week about a boy who apparently has anger management problems. The school called me in error last week because they thought this boy hit my daughter. Turned out he hit some other girl who fit my daughter’s description. I was called afain this week because the boy grabbed and pushed my daughter. I asked her about it and she made it sound like no big deal. She said the boy has problems controlling his anger. I thought it was a bigger deal than she did. I told her it was never ok for someone to hit her and she said ok and went off to play.