College application lessons learned

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Do schools track whether you opened their emails BEFORE you submit an app, or only after?

My DD ticked the box on the PSAT, and quickly realized that the email from a school quadrupled after she opened and read one of their emails.

She unsubscribed from emails, but it still kind of enjoying the snail mail. It’s giving her a good perspective on how aggressively schools market themselves, “fighting” over a kid with merely better-than-average PSAT scores.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How can you get data on acceptance rate by major?? Please share!

Unfortunately no easy way! I got the best information from a google search that indexes the school's website. Typically it is majors like computer science, engineering, or business that can be lower by major. Example: if you google "UIUC computer science acceptance rate" - this pops up https://blog.admissions.illinois.edu/get-to-know-computer-science-and-majors-similar-to-computer-science/
6.7% for CS versus close to 60%

Also for state schools, check the rate for in-state versus out-of-state.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My kid has a rough time in Covid but a silver lining has been this: if you let go of the idea of going to a "top" or competitive school, the process is actually easy and fairly stress-free (and you'll get a lot of merit money too). There are a ton of schools with high acceptance rates that are eager to have your kid.

+1000

Focus on helping your kid build strengths for handling college, seizing opportunities, figuring out what they want to do with their life, and developing optimism and self-efficacy for their future rather than trying to optimize their admission into selective colleges. Every time they seem to be sucked into the college competition game, return them into thinking about what they want to do and why they want to do it.
Let the chips fall where they may with college admissions, but don't let your kid leave home into a massive financial and energy investment of college without feeling like they have some sense of control, purpose and excitement over their future and some visions for what that might be. Not just pride or disappointment because they got/didn't get some brass ring of college admission. It's very easy to just be good at school and think you need to just continue being good at school--it's harder to make that transition to building a life/career.

It's not either/or. Most kids at selective colleges know what they want and are ready for careers.

It's just jealousy to pretend otherwise.

I didn't say it was either/or--rather "let the chips fall where they may" but prioritize sense of purpose first. I say this advice as my eldest kid who is now a senior at a highly selective college and, like many of his friends there, are feeling a lot of anxiety about life after school. They have been successful so long at school, but they feel vaguely unmoved by future opportunities. Some have good job prospects, some don't know yet. But for both groups the vibe is more like "is this all there is?". What I've learned for my younger is to start addressing purpose earlier and don't let them get sucked into competitive college process at the expense of it. Kids only have so much time/energy and for high-achieving kids the culture is often pushing them just to get into the best college possible--some of which is very much out of their control. And the evidence doesn't show that it makes a huge difference anyway--it's the kid not the school that makes the difference.

Excellent points.

[Anonymous]

Early Action is overrated.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My kid has a rough time in Covid but a silver lining has been this: if you let go of the idea of going to a "top" or competitive school, the process is actually easy and fairly stress-free (and you'll get a lot of merit money too). There are a ton of schools with high acceptance rates that are eager to have your kid.

+1000

Focus on helping your kid build strengths for handling college, seizing opportunities, figuring out what they want to do with their life, and developing optimism and self-efficacy for their future rather than trying to optimize their admission into selective colleges. Every time they seem to be sucked into the college competition game, return them into thinking about what they want to do and why they want to do it.
Let the chips fall where they may with college admissions, but don't let your kid leave home into a massive financial and energy investment of college without feeling like they have some sense of control, purpose and excitement over their future and some visions for what that might be. Not just pride or disappointment because they got/didn't get some brass ring of college admission. It's very easy to just be good at school and think you need to just continue being good at school--it's harder to make that transition to building a life/career.

It's not either/or. Most kids at selective colleges know what they want and are ready for careers.

It's just jealousy to pretend otherwise.

They know what they want or what their parents tell them they want?

I have a very high achieving kid who was really not sure what she wanted. She went in with a major and changed her mind. Many, many kids change majors. The statistic is very high.

Supposedly 75% of kids change their major at least once in college. Are you suggesting that the other 25% can't think for themselves and blindly follow what their parents tell them to do?

No. Some kids really do know what they want but it is a small percentage. On this board, you see many parents pushing Ivy or bust, CS or engineering as the only viable major, etc. those kids are not finding their own path. They are doing what their parents want them to do.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:AOs no longer want kids from good high schools with stable families.

+1

Sounds like sour grapes. I think if you look at admissions, the vast majority are from “good schools.” I have no idea about their family lives and guess you do not either. I’m sorry your planning for college since grade school and creating a child that is exactly the same as every other child that has been groomed since elementary school did not work out and your kid ended up below where you planned. The schools can smell that desperation from a mile away.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Early Action is overrated.

Why? Can you elaborate?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My kid has a rough time in Covid but a silver lining has been this: if you let go of the idea of going to a "top" or competitive school, the process is actually easy and fairly stress-free (and you'll get a lot of merit money too). There are a ton of schools with high acceptance rates that are eager to have your kid.

This. The school doesn’t matter as much as what you do once you’re there.

I think that really only applies to non elite colleges. Let's be honest here.. elite colleges buy you the connections and network not readily available to the rest of the colleges.

My kid didn't apply to HYP, but they did to Stanford and MIT (deferred). I'm not holding my breath, though.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My kid has a rough time in Covid but a silver lining has been this: if you let go of the idea of going to a "top" or competitive school, the process is actually easy and fairly stress-free (and you'll get a lot of merit money too). There are a ton of schools with high acceptance rates that are eager to have your kid.

This. The school doesn’t matter as much as what you do once you’re there.

I think that really only applies to non elite colleges. Let's be honest here.. elite colleges buy you the connections and network not readily available to the rest of the colleges.

My kid didn't apply to HYP, but they did to Stanford and MIT (deferred). I'm not holding my breath, though.

I have a family member who went to an Ivy league school and did nothing with her degree. She is super smart and Ivy-educated but is unable to hold down a job. Just because you go to a great school does not mean you will do great things. From my experience, I have seen more success among those who went state flagships and community college! They know they are starting at a disadvantage, so they work extra hard to succeed in life. And succeed they do.

[Anonymous]

Put everything on a spreadsheet, including due date and cost. Check in with your kid regularly. And I ditto starting early on the application, like in August.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My kid has a rough time in Covid but a silver lining has been this: if you let go of the idea of going to a "top" or competitive school, the process is actually easy and fairly stress-free (and you'll get a lot of merit money too). There are a ton of schools with high acceptance rates that are eager to have your kid.

This. The school doesn’t matter as much as what you do once you’re there.

I think that really only applies to non elite colleges. Let's be honest here.. elite colleges buy you the connections and network not readily available to the rest of the colleges.

My kid didn't apply to HYP, but they did to Stanford and MIT (deferred). I'm not holding my breath, though.

I have a family member who went to an Ivy league school and did nothing with her degree. She is super smart and Ivy-educated but is unable to hold down a job. Just because you go to a great school does not mean you will do great things. From my experience, I have seen more success among those who went state flagships and community college! They know they are starting at a disadvantage, so they work extra hard to succeed in life. And succeed they do.

yes, but our family member is most likely an outlier. Doors open more wider and easily for grads from elite institutions. It's been that way forever.

But of course, that doesn't mean a graduate from a non elite univ can't find a good job. That's not what I'm saying at all.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Early Action is overrated.

Why? Can you elaborate?

I am not PP but this year EA (and ED too) for high stats kids has resulted in far more deferrals (and rejections) than the past. For deferrals, maybe RD will end up with same result as the past...time will tell..

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Early Action is overrated.

Why? Can you elaborate?

I am not PP but this year EA (and ED too) for high stats kids has resulted in far more deferrals (and rejections) than the past. For deferrals, maybe RD will end up with same result as the past...time will tell..

Right, EA does not seem to help with acceptance as I naively thought before.

That said, kids DO need to do EA at most state schools to be considered for merit. And it is nice to get a bunch of applications out of the way in November instead of having even more due in January.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Early Action is overrated.

Why? Can you elaborate?

Not the PP and I wouldn't put it that way, exactly but I understand the sentiment.

I recommend you apply to as many EA schools as possible. But know that EA acceptance rates are for the most part just like RD acceptance rates.
EA is nice though because while there are a ton of deferrals in this round, if you're accepted EA it's nice to have that. Some EA decisions are released before the holidays, some in January or even later.

The decision plan that gives you an advantage is binding ED. That is not possible for everyone. ED acceptance rates are inflated somewhat with recruited athletes etc, but even after netting those out, ED gives a definite admissions advantage.
ED does not generally give an advantage for those whose stats are below the school's 50%. Sometimes of course, but generally not.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Do schools track whether you opened their emails BEFORE you submit an app, or only after?

Yes, it is part of demonstrated interest.