Terrible Elementary Teacher - what to do?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:And all the other suggestions people made talk to the counselor etc just made things worse. Since my kid was in a lower grade, I just took grades that year with a grain of salt, I told my kid that too, and just supported my kid the best I could.

Besides wanting your kid to go down a level, what else was so terrible?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:And all the other suggestions people made talk to the counselor etc just made things worse. Since my kid was in a lower grade, I just took grades that year with a grain of salt, I told my kid that too, and just supported my kid the best I could.

Besides wanting your kid to go down a level, what else was so terrible?

My kid would get perfect on all the multiple choice questions and would be heavily penalized for the writing. If 70 percent of the test was multiple choice that was close to what my kid would earn. This is a kid that would earn writing awards in later years including being selected as number 1 English student out of entire school etc, perfect score on magnet test for writing prompt, 5s in AP English etc.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My daughter had a terrible reading teacher. We were at private school and the teacher was cliquey and attacked kids who weren’t part of the “in crowd”. She also had kids who attended the school. The more we complained the worse it got for my daughter. She told us our daughter couldn’t read which was patently untrue. It was so baffling and she wanted my kid dropped down to the low level reading class. She ended up with an 800 verbal SAT senior year of HS and I wanted to snapshot the SAT score and send it. Obviously, I didn’t.

Nothing happened and at the end of the year we wrote a letter regarding all of this teachers appalling behaviors to the principal. A decade later this horrible manipulative person is still at the school now a full time teacher and is often featured on their FB page.

There is probably unfortunately nothing you can do unless you go all the way up and that will probably involve legal costs other than switch schools.

Maybe you should send that score along with your concerns and copy to the principal. What have you got to lose? You're kid's done, right? Now you can give her the Auntie Em speech to Miss Gulch.

Could be therapeutic....

[Anonymous]

OP you are doing the right thing by empathizing with your child. He should know it’s the teacher and not him. He should also know you are fighting for him and he is not alone. That alone won’t fix the classroom issue but it is important your child know that life stinks sometimes and that you are working to help. Most importantly- he knows you believe him.

If your child had an IEP or 504, it’s easier to switch because crappy teachers usually don’t follow them and you can get out that way (that’s what happened to us). You can get a 504 for anxiety - sounds like that is the case. Then you show how the teacher is making it worse.

You need to be polite but firm. This teacher is a problem. Can you visit the classroom? When my son had an abusive lunch lady, we volunteered in the cafeteria and she knew we were watching. When I couldn’t be there, I told other parents to watch her. Be the room parent or go to everything you can. Document everything. Do not worry about other kids. You can’t save them all. If you fight for other kids, you’ll find parents who will stab you in the back.

Escalate to mcps central office. Explain the trauma this is causing.

If you can homeschool for a year, it might come to that but I’d fight until the end and I’d let everyone know it’s easier to fix the problem than deal with me every day.

Good luck. I’ve been there.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am a teacher. Let me start off by saying, you must remain calm. I would invite a parent inside of the classroom. This would allow you to see how I structure my classroom, my day, transitions, bathroom breaks, etc. You not only get a read on your child but others in the classroom environment as well. I am not saying your child is lying but a student could read a physical cue to another child (with whom needs it due to accommodations) as a mean glare. A student may hear a teacher tell a student to wait two minutes until you go to the bathroom so you can give out directions to all as refusal to go to the bathroom. So again, ask for an observation. Report observations to the principal, counselor, etc and ask for an action plan. Don’t just voice your concern, request action and a time frame to see improvements.

If possible send in a qualified outside observer. We had a psychologist observe as part of an evaluation and it was really eye-opening what she saw and reported back. The school took her observations more seriously than the parents too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We had a long term sub like this at the end of last year. It was awful. Parents complained. Nothing was done becasue there was noone else.

And no doubt the new teacher knows this. Suck it up, buttercup. It could be much worse. Just look at how some teachers treat students abroad. Be glad you have a teacher.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My daughter had a terrible reading teacher. We were at private school and the teacher was cliquey and attacked kids who weren’t part of the “in crowd”. She also had kids who attended the school. The more we complained the worse it got for my daughter. She told us our daughter couldn’t read which was patently untrue. It was so baffling and she wanted my kid dropped down to the low level reading class. She ended up with an 800 verbal SAT senior year of HS and I wanted to snapshot the SAT score and send it. Obviously, I didn’t.

Nothing happened and at the end of the year we wrote a letter regarding all of this teachers appalling behaviors to the principal. A decade later this horrible manipulative person is still at the school now a full time teacher and is often featured on their FB page.

There is probably unfortunately nothing you can do unless you go all the way up and that will probably involve legal costs other than switch schools.

Maybe you should send that score along with your concerns and copy to the principal. What have you got to lose? You're kid's done, right? Now you can give her the Auntie Em speech to Miss Gulch.

Could be therapeutic....

If they wouldn’t listen to me a decade ago- they aren’t going to listen to me now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP you are doing the right thing by empathizing with your child. He should know it’s the teacher and not him. He should also know you are fighting for him and he is not alone. That alone won’t fix the classroom issue but it is important your child know that life stinks sometimes and that you are working to help. Most importantly- he knows you believe him.

If your child had an IEP or 504, it’s easier to switch because crappy teachers usually don’t follow them and you can get out that way (that’s what happened to us). You can get a 504 for anxiety - sounds like that is the case. Then you show how the teacher is making it worse.

You need to be polite but firm. This teacher is a problem. Can you visit the classroom? When my son had an abusive lunch lady, we volunteered in the cafeteria and she knew we were watching. When I couldn’t be there, I told other parents to watch her. Be the room parent or go to everything you can. Document everything. Do not worry about other kids. You can’t save them all. If you fight for other kids, you’ll find parents who will stab you in the back.

Escalate to mcps central office. Explain the trauma this is causing.

If you can homeschool for a year, it might come to that but I’d fight until the end and I’d let everyone know it’s easier to fix the problem than deal with me every day.

Good luck. I’ve been there.

OP here. Thank you, thank you for this good advice. Appreciate the support!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:First, telling your kid their teacher is a bad teacher is not a very good idea. You are making the situation worse.

Second, if parents or a group of parents demand that their child be moved to a different class admin has to do something. If the teacher is truly doing and saying inappropriate or mean things you need to document and report, repeatedly. Then tell the principal you're going to the press or reporting to the Dept. of Education or something, don't just give up.

If you remove your kid to homeschool or private you are leaving the rest of those poor kids to suffer for the rest of the year.

What? No, they don’t. You aren’t in a position to “demand” anything.

I worked in public school for many years and yes parents can insist and demand and not stop until something is done, keep escalating, go to school board, go to parent groups, go to local paper, call state board of education, but don't give up. It is the right thing to do but only if the teacher is truly terrible and damaging as opposed to not exactly what you want for your child, there's a big difference.

+1

[Anonymous]

Is there anyone in MCPS outside the school that OP can contact? To come and observe the classroom and provide any feedback?

[Anonymous]

Based on what you're reported, I would advise you to get your child out of that classroom ASAP. Don't wait and hope it will get better. It could get worse. Some teachers (truly a small minority) are just sadistic, and know there's no accountability. I'm writing this based on personal experience, hoping it would get better (never having had bad experiences like this, only excellent teachers for years), assuming good faith, assuming beneficent school culture, etc.

One of the posters said to pull your kid out, homeschool, and then re-enroll demanding a different teacher. If that's possible, if a principal is stonewalling, do it.

[Anonymous]

Also, don't waste your time and money with consultants, IEP, etc. Just get your kid out of that abusive classroom ASAP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I realize there is a teaching shortage, but what can a parent do if your child is placed with a newly hired, horribly mean teacher? My child who is a soft spoken, happy kid with straight As starts regularly crying and telling us how miserable he is with his teacher? We, along with many other parents in the classroom, have complained separately, met with administrators at the school. Then what? I’ve been trying to wait for things to improve within the classroom while also telling my child that “everyone has a bad teacher” sometimes and the likelihood of having another bad teacher next year is low. However, today my child had a complete meltdown at dinner about how his teacher gives him dirty looks all day, won’t let the kids use the bathroom, and berates children in the classroom. We’ve already met with the teacher 1:1 and the school administration team. Nothing has improved in the last two weeks. My husband and I are starting to really worry this is creating some mental health issues for our kid.

Any advice? I’m starting to think either I see the continual decline of my kid while the school does nothing or have to transfer to private, homeschool - all options I really don’t want to have to explore unless given no choice.

I’m so sorry for your child and the other kids in that classroom. Does your kid give details about what the teacher does or says that is mean? I believe that she’s not a nice person but you need some specific examples when you go to the principal or beyond. You need a very specific complaint or nothing will be done because the principal can’t change the teacher’s personality. What the principal could do is tell the teacher he/she is not allowed to deny kids going to the bathroom or isn’t allowed to take away recess or isn’t allowed to call kids names or whatever specific thing the teacher is doing wrong. Now obviously the principal won’t be in the classroom watching the teacher all the time to ensure good behavior but it might help the situation if the teacher knows the principal is onto them and giving them specific guidelines to follow. The teacher might be more likely to think 2x before denying a student the bathroom if specifically told not to do this.

However, it may come to you needing to take your kid out. I know that’s not an easy solution at all but I’d try to homeschool (virtual academy) if I were you and could do it logistically (do you and/or your spouse WFH?). I’d rather take the homeschool route for this year than try a private school bc it would likely be an easier transition for your kid to do homeschool than to get used to a whole new school/teacher/classroom at private, especially if you’re planning to try public again next year w a new teacher…that seems like a lot of upheaval.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What you don't understand is that there is not another teacher waiting to take their place, what you have is a warm body. From the pandemic, to distance learning to parents absolute fury with teachers, many have retired or left the profession. There are not teachers available to take this bad ones place.

I work at an ES with a couple of "warm bodies." The administration knows, but when there is no one to hire instead what are they supposed to do?

A long term sub or a series of subs would probably be better than this teacher. I'm so sorry you are having to deal with this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I realize there is a teaching shortage, but what can a parent do if your child is placed with a newly hired, horribly mean teacher? My child who is a soft spoken, happy kid with straight As starts regularly crying and telling us how miserable he is with his teacher? We, along with many other parents in the classroom, have complained separately, met with administrators at the school. Then what? I’ve been trying to wait for things to improve within the classroom while also telling my child that “everyone has a bad teacher” sometimes and the likelihood of having another bad teacher next year is low. However, today my child had a complete meltdown at dinner about how his teacher gives him dirty looks all day, won’t let the kids use the bathroom, and berates children in the classroom. We’ve already met with the teacher 1:1 and the school administration team. Nothing has improved in the last two weeks. My husband and I are starting to really worry this is creating some mental health issues for our kid.

Any advice? I’m starting to think either I see the continual decline of my kid while the school does nothing or have to transfer to private, homeschool - all options I really don’t want to have to explore unless given no choice.

I’m so sorry for your child and the other kids in that classroom. Does your kid give details about what the teacher does or says that is mean? I believe that she’s not a nice person but you need some specific examples when you go to the principal or beyond. You need a very specific complaint or nothing will be done because the principal can’t change the teacher’s personality. What the principal could do is tell the teacher he/she is not allowed to deny kids going to the bathroom or isn’t allowed to take away recess or isn’t allowed to call kids names or whatever specific thing the teacher is doing wrong. Now obviously the principal won’t be in the classroom watching the teacher all the time to ensure good behavior but it might help the situation if the teacher knows the principal is onto them and giving them specific guidelines to follow. The teacher might be more likely to think 2x before denying a student the bathroom if specifically told not to do this.

However, it may come to you needing to take your kid out. I know that’s not an easy solution at all but I’d try to homeschool (virtual academy) if I were you and could do it logistically (do you and/or your spouse WFH?). I’d rather take the homeschool route for this year than try a private school bc it would likely be an easier transition for your kid to do homeschool than to get used to a whole new school/teacher/classroom at private, especially if you’re planning to try public again next year w a new teacher…that seems like a lot of upheaval.

Please note, this assumes the principal has bandwidth, backbone, leadership capacity, basic courage, and cares about kids enough to risk pissing off a teacher. Even if so, a pathologically sadistic personality, if that's the case, *does not change*--the person will just find another way to target your kid (perhaps an easy target) and others. Don't assume good faith and a beneficent school culture or leadership.