Existential crisis in downtown Bethesda

[Anonymous]

OP just finishing the thread, and your post a few up makes you sound insufferable. You’re not better than everyone walking by you. I don’t live in Bethesda, so no dog in this fight.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I live walkable to Bethesda but technically Chevy Chase and only go to Bethesda Row to get dinner every so often at Fish Taco. I never shop at the stores OP is whining about. But I live here, like PP because I can walk everywhere. I have a tree-lined street. I have access to the Bethesda pool and library. Great schools. And I always tip when I get a coffee. But I’m a millennial so maybe it’s just you as a Boomer, OP.

A 50 year old is not a boomer.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Most of my friends and family members not from here (and across all incomes) observe the same thing about lack of independent shops and dining. They feel this area is devoid of character and is entirely charmless. I’m sharing this only to say that you are not the only person who feels this way. Perhaps Bethesda and the greater DC area is not the right spot for you.

OP:That's just it! It feels like a synthetic, Epcot Center generic version of an UMC neighborhood. Even Great Neck Long Island has more authenticity and local character. I do like the residential parts though, some of them. But it has been so humid and, well, swampy and mosquito-y here. I am really questioning its appeal.


Here is what I value: Education & at least some similarly educated and accomplished people; beautiful high quality housing; leafy neighborhoods where people and kids know each other; natural beauty, the outdoors, outdoor recreation like hiking, biking, skiing, swimming, sailing, horseback riding; the arts; high quality food which can mean restaurants but also farmer's markets with real farmers that are not more expensive than Whole Foods. Education has value. Making things has value. Making and listening to music have value. Entertaining indoors and outdoors with people I love and like talking to about things that matter (not just the latest status symbol who who stayed in what hotel on which vacation) have value. I am lucky in that my work is already lucrative and meaningful, and is portable. I do not care what type of car I or others drive or how big your engagement ring is/was and I have never attended a Spin class.

Where should I live?

Great neck and just ignore the fancy cars and rings.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP just finishing the thread, and your post a few up makes you sound insufferable. You’re not better than everyone walking by you. I don’t live in Bethesda, so no dog in this fight.

I didn't say I was better. I said I had different values than what I am seeing around me here, and from some others in this thread. Perhaps it would be more "sufferable" if I had phrased it as "X has value *to me*.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Most of my friends and family members not from here (and across all incomes) observe the same thing about lack of independent shops and dining. They feel this area is devoid of character and is entirely charmless. I’m sharing this only to say that you are not the only person who feels this way. Perhaps Bethesda and the greater DC area is not the right spot for you.

OP:That's just it! It feels like a synthetic, Epcot Center generic version of an UMC neighborhood. Even Great Neck Long Island has more authenticity and local character. I do like the residential parts though, some of them. But it has been so humid and, well, swampy and mosquito-y here. I am really questioning its appeal.


Here is what I value: Education & at least some similarly educated and accomplished people; beautiful high quality housing; leafy neighborhoods where people and kids know each other; natural beauty, the outdoors, outdoor recreation like hiking, biking, skiing, swimming, sailing, horseback riding; the arts; high quality food which can mean restaurants but also farmer's markets with real farmers that are not more expensive than Whole Foods. Education has value. Making things has value. Making and listening to music have value. Entertaining indoors and outdoors with people I love and like talking to about things that matter (not just the latest status symbol who who stayed in what hotel on which vacation) have value. I am lucky in that my work is already lucrative and meaningful, and is portable. I do not care what type of car I or others drive or how big your engagement ring is/was and I have never attended a Spin class.


OP and very funny. I think they wouldn't let me in without the Audi and the 5 carat rock.
Where should I live?

Great neck and just ignore the fancy cars and rings.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am sitting in downtown Bethesda on a Sunday afternoon, sipping my $5.50 iced coffee. I am looking around me at these three blocks of fancy chain stores, that are just like the fancy chain stores in the analagous parts of other upscale suburbs, and watching people pop in and out like automatons. It seems so pointless and empty. Is this what it's all for? Strive to live in a HCOL area and make a big enough salary to live there so you can go disburse your dollars among certain branded storefronts as if you are robot operating on preprogrammed instructions thinking that you "belong"?

As I got my coffee I witnessed a middle aged UMC (white) woman haranguing the (black) barista for ten minutes about how dishonest they and the business are for putting too much ice in her iced juice drink & how they are defrauding customers by putting in too much ice and not enough juice. Seriously? Work all your life for the privilege of raising your kids around people like this?

Yup. Live in McLean and have nothing in common with these people. Shallow, miserable, vapid and live to cut other people down - they don't even like each other, they barely seem to tolerate each other, everything is on the down low, and nothing is ever enough.

I have so much more in common with the people I grew up with - truly interesting people who are engaged with life - we have all landed in different areas, all different professions, but pick right back up as if no time has passed. True friendship is a beautiful thing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Most of my friends and family members not from here (and across all incomes) observe the same thing about lack of independent shops and dining. They feel this area is devoid of character and is entirely charmless. I’m sharing this only to say that you are not the only person who feels this way. Perhaps Bethesda and the greater DC area is not the right spot for you.

+1

People I know who visit this area, and spend any time outside the museums, call this area strip mall hell. They have a point!

[Anonymous]

Just chilllll and order light ice!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Most of my friends and family members not from here (and across all incomes) observe the same thing about lack of independent shops and dining. They feel this area is devoid of character and is entirely charmless. I’m sharing this only to say that you are not the only person who feels this way. Perhaps Bethesda and the greater DC area is not the right spot for you.

OP:That's just it! It feels like a synthetic, Epcot Center generic version of an UMC neighborhood. Even Great Neck Long Island has more authenticity and local character. I do like the residential parts though, some of them. But it has been so humid and, well, swampy and mosquito-y here. I am really questioning its appeal.


Here is what I value: Education & at least some similarly educated and accomplished people; beautiful high quality housing; leafy neighborhoods where people and kids know each other; natural beauty, the outdoors, outdoor recreation like hiking, biking, skiing, swimming, sailing, horseback riding; the arts; high quality food which can mean restaurants but also farmer's markets with real farmers that are not more expensive than Whole Foods. Education has value. Making things has value. Making and listening to music have value. Entertaining indoors and outdoors with people I love and like talking to about things that matter (not just the latest status symbol who who stayed in what hotel on which vacation) have value. I am lucky in that my work is already lucrative and meaningful, and is portable. I do not care what type of car I or others drive or how big your engagement ring is/was and I have never attended a Spin class.

Where should I live?

What’s wrong with where you live right now?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP just finishing the thread, and your post a few up makes you sound insufferable. You’re not better than everyone walking by you. I don’t live in Bethesda, so no dog in this fight.

I didn't say I was better. I said I had different values than what I am seeing around me here, and from some others in this thread. Perhaps it would be more "sufferable" if I had phrased it as "X has value *to me*.

I live here, I’m about your age. I took a walk from my house and popped into a shop to see if I could find a sundress or two for a family vacation next month. I wonder if I walked past you, silently judging me. You don’t know anything about me, or anyone else who walked by you today.

[Anonymous]

Bethesda sucks. I go there sometimes to meet a friend and grab a bite to eat but I’m amazed at all the vapid people walking around and acting like the faux high end chain stores are the cat’s meow. The restaurants are mostly pretty lame also.
Brooklyn in NYC or Santa Monica, LA are both 100x better. Chevy Chase MD is awful as well.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Bethesda sucks. I go there sometimes to meet a friend and grab a bite to eat but I’m amazed at all the vapid people walking around and acting like the faux high end chain stores are the cat’s meow. The restaurants are mostly pretty lame also.
Brooklyn in NYC or Santa Monica, LA are both 100x better. Chevy Chase MD is awful as well.

Downtown Bethesda is by no mean perfect. Bethesda Row is operated by a single landlord charging high rents which limits the stores, although why they end up with multiple outposts of internet brands like peloton and warby parker is a mystery to me (like how bank branches can apparently be so profitable).

All that said, I am not sure which is the more ridiculous part of your post— the part where you can tell everyone is vapid while you grab a quick bite to eat or the part where you compare it to Brooklyn and Santa Monica, both of which have their own issues and neither of which is likely to be a reasonable alternative for someone looking for a place to live eat or shop.

Bethesda has a lot going for it even if you never step foot on Bethesda avenue or Bethesda row. And of course not everyone is spending their time yelling at waitstaff or being pretentious or whatever other stereotypes you have.

[Anonymous]

To the OP, and any one else that is reading.

Where you live is for stability, predictability, and a sense of calm. You go home knowing what you find there is not an exciting adventure, or some authentic exotic experience. How you feel about the corner coffee shop is how a man in Shanghai view his corner eatery, and how a person in Panama view his corner fruit stand. They are all boring and predictable.

People think they go on a trip to recharge. This is exactly backwards. You recharge at home and expend your energy on your travels.

Life is not just about where you live, but where you visit. Your home is the cocoon, so that when you return from that trip to Shanghai or Panama, you sink in to a comfortable familiarity, to build up your energy for your next adventure. So, yes, I miss the cafes in Europe, I miss the hot springs in the mountains of Japan, but my mind can be on autopilot when I walk into the Starbucks so that I can save my attention for something else.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:To the OP, and any one else that is reading.

Where you live is for stability, predictability, and a sense of calm. You go home knowing what you find there is not an exciting adventure, or some authentic exotic experience. How you feel about the corner coffee shop is how a man in Shanghai view his corner eatery, and how a person in Panama view his corner fruit stand. They are all boring and predictable.

People think they go on a trip to recharge. This is exactly backwards. You recharge at home and expend your energy on your travels.

Life is not just about where you live, but where you visit. Your home is the cocoon, so that when you return from that trip to Shanghai or Panama, you sink in to a comfortable familiarity, to build up your energy for your next adventure. So, yes, I miss the cafes in Europe, I miss the hot springs in the mountains of Japan, but my mind can be on autopilot when I walk into the Starbucks so that I can save my attention for something else.

I think I love you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Bethesda sucks. I go there sometimes to meet a friend and grab a bite to eat but I’m amazed at all the vapid people walking around and acting like the faux high end chain stores are the cat’s meow. The restaurants are mostly pretty lame also.
Brooklyn in NYC or Santa Monica, LA are both 100x better. Chevy Chase MD is awful as well.

Downtown Bethesda is by no mean perfect. Bethesda Row is operated by a single landlord charging high rents which limits the stores, although why they end up with multiple outposts of internet brands like peloton and warby parker is a mystery to me (like how bank branches can apparently be so profitable).

All that said, I am not sure which is the more ridiculous part of your post— the part where you can tell everyone is vapid while you grab a quick bite to eat or the part where you compare it to Brooklyn and Santa Monica, both of which have their own issues and neither of which is likely to be a reasonable alternative for someone looking for a place to live eat or shop.

Bethesda has a lot going for it even if you never step foot on Bethesda avenue or Bethesda row. And of course not everyone is spending their time yelling at waitstaff or being pretentious or whatever other stereotypes you have.

+1. It’s no better or worse than any other close-in UMC suburb of DC and awfully similar to close-in UMC suburbs in other east coast cities. Not sure why all the hate. What did you expect it to be? If UMC suburbs aren’t your thing, cool, there’s plenty of other places out there.