What were your bonding activities with your parents growing up?

[Anonymous]

late night toast & conversations in the kitchen
me learning to cook from her

w my dad, we used to go to a diner & have lunch
watching the nutcracker & westerns

[Anonymous]

None. My working mom took me on errands with her. Now I take my kid on errands with me. She sometimes took me shopping, and taught me how to cook. She came home from work and started cooking dinner and I would sometimes stand there stirring what she cooked. She taught me some frugal habits and the names of plants and flowers.

[Anonymous]

I love this thread! It's funny, I'm very close with my parents, but I don't remember having a "thing" with either one of them. My dad did make it a point to do 1-1 trips with his kids (I'm one of three kids), but this wasn't a frequent thing at all. Life was so busy between all our commitments and school. I do remember family traditions, like Friday nights at the local pizza place, or all watching Star Trek TNG together on Saturday nights (yes, we were nerds!)

With my own three children, I do try to make it a point to establish traditions with each individually, and as a family. My 12 year old daughter and I try to play pickleball together for an hour every week, and then have dinner after. My 9 year old son and I like to go to the diner early one day a week for breakfast or for an early run before school (he's my only early riser). My 6 year old and I bond over books and card games. As a family, we always devote one weekend night to family movie night with lots of snacks (I can see that this is changing, though - lots of arguing over movie selection, particularly by my eldest!)

[Anonymous]

Every weekend they would come back home from a farmer's market and we would all unpack groceries together and start planing our meals. We would cook together or just help around kitchen. These meals were super special and no wonder everyone in a family is a great cook.

Our parents would take us either for a ride outside town or to the movies, theatre and galleries every week. Later on, being with friends was more important, but family meals remained everyone's favorite time.

[Anonymous]

My mom worked nights and my dad and I would have popcorn and cream sodas while we watched our favorite show one night a week.

Libraries on weekend mornings

Dinner every night at 6pm

Vacations

[Anonymous]

My dad and I rode horses together. That takes a ton of time and it's something that made us very, very close.

I now ride with my daughters. Yes, it's the most obnoxiously expensive sport, but it allows us to spend a lot of time together and see each other in different ways than parent/children.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I did a couple of solo trips with each parent as a teen/tween. It was always a lot of fun...figuring out where we'd go, what we'd do when we got there, etc. They'd let me do most of the planning, which felt very adult.

I just wanted to say, this is awesome! I have twin girls so doing separate trips would feel weird (yes, we treat them as individuals, no they don't have all the same friends, no I don't ask if they are both invited to things), but I like the idea so I'm going to float it with my husband.

[Anonymous]

Every week my father would take me to a museum or a theatre. Every single week. We had excellent discussions. Unfortunately my DS is not a theatre buff, Lord knows I tried But we bonded over baseball and football.

I had no bonding experiences with my mother. I remember calling her "The Warden" even at the age of 5.

[Anonymous]

I have a lot of younger siblings so I don't remember doing much alone with a parent, though we were often with them to run errands and do chores and sometimes went on vacation or did day trips like to a museum, baseball game, or fishing.

My dad took each of us camping by ourselves once. Each of my parents chaperoned one of my field trips in elementary school. Girl Scouts had a father-daughter square dance and my dad went to that with me a couple times, and he would occasionally take one or two of us to his office if we were off school. Sometimes I'd hang out in the kitchen while my mom cooked, setting the table or helping her. She would sometimes take just me to the grocery store to help her while my dad stayed home with the younger kids--it wasn't that fun but I did learn a lot about meal planning, comparison shopping, and other useful skills. When I was little, if I was quiet my mom let me stay up to watch Murphy Brown with her--but we didn't really talk or anything. I don't think my parents did a lot of deliberate bonding with us, but we still spent a lot of time together.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Trips with my dad to the bookstore or library and chatting about our finds on the drive home

Walking with the dog to the park after dinner

+1

This was how we spent our time as well, going to the library, and bookstore.

I absolutely treasure these memories.

[Anonymous]

You all are lucky, seriously, I mean that. My dad took me to bars with him until he got sober. Then I had to attend an AA meeting where he publicly "made amends." We don't speak.

[Anonymous]

Watching TV. That's literally all we did as a family when I was younger.

Also, my mom is one of those parents who is very big on everything being equal for my siblings and I, so there were no solo trips. THat wouldn't have been fair to the other kids.

I remember that bumming me out the most as a kid over not really connecting with my parents doing other things like my friends did with theirs... bike rides, game night, etc. My dad had to travel to Australia for work and his company said he could bring a guest. Australia was my dream place to visit as a teen but because my siblings couldn't also go, I didn't get to go.

I travel quite a bit for work and I always make a point of taking one of my kids along for a solo trip with me. We've made so many amazing memories that way.

[Anonymous]

We also watched TV and I went to work with mom in the summer and "volunteered" at the non profit where she worked. My parents never even walked around the neighborhood and couldn't afford to do many fun things.

[Anonymous]

My dad and I had a night in December where we would go out to dinner and shopping for Christmas gifts for my mom.

If my dad had the day off from work he would let me go to school late so we could go out to breakfast together at out favorite diner.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Family dinner every night

This.

We did this and it was miserable. All they did was yell at us. Joined every club I could in high school so I could get home late and miss dinner.

We did family dinner every night and it was NOT miserable. So there's that.

I do think being flexible about it is key. So make sure there are some nights when it's NOT everyone at the table together. It feels *really* special when I let my kids eat in the living room watching a movie. Or the rare times we go out to eat as a family. They love it!

Also, my mom would hold family dinner until my brother got home from late sports practices. I remember being in elementary school and STARVING because dinner wouldn't be until 7:30pm. She just thought it was important for us to all sit down once a day. So we did.