S/O Feeding people buffet style

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here,

We aren't going to get past the grace thing on one of the holiest days of the year with some of our elderly family members. We just aren't.

I don't think we have enough counter space for that, and the logistics would mean the line going into and out of the kitchen would be through the same door. I just don't see how serving that many people off kitchen counters works in many houses.

We do grace before the first person goes through the buffet. If a person has mobility issues an able bodied person fills the mobility issues person’s plate for them and then goes back to fill their own plate. Parents tend to help the younger ones too.

Yep this is how it goes. Parents of young children eat last and hope there is enough to go around. It reminds me of that line in A Christmas Story "my mother hasn't had a hot meal for herself in 15 years". After you get everyone what they want, cut their food, and get them settled then you can fill your own plate if others aren't already making their way for seconds.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here,

We aren't going to get past the grace thing on one of the holiest days of the year with some of our elderly family members. We just aren't.

I don't think we have enough counter space for that, and the logistics would mean the line going into and out of the kitchen would be through the same door. I just don't see how serving that many people off kitchen counters works in many houses.

We do grace before the first person goes through the buffet. If a person has mobility issues an able bodied person fills the mobility issues person’s plate for them and then goes back to fill their own plate. Parents tend to help the younger ones too.

Yep this is how it goes. Parents of young children eat last and hope there is enough to go around. It reminds me of that line in A Christmas Story "my mother hasn't had a hot meal for herself in 15 years". After you get everyone what they want, cut their food, and get them settled then you can fill your own plate if others aren't already making their way for seconds.

You guys have some paltry gatherings, and some unhelpful guests. I have two kids, and DH and I each make a plate for them and then go through the line. It doesn’t take that long to go through the line, even if there are 18 people or so. I’ve never NOT had a full, hot plate of food (and seconds) even when I was breastfeeding, and even when I was breastfeeding AND hosting. Those who ate earliest are willing to help do small things like hold a baby, refill a 5yo’s milk cup or whatever else a kid may need so that the parents can eat.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here,

We aren't going to get past the grace thing on one of the holiest days of the year with some of our elderly family members. We just aren't.

I don't think we have enough counter space for that, and the logistics would mean the line going into and out of the kitchen would be through the same door. I just don't see how serving that many people off kitchen counters works in many houses.

We do grace before the first person goes through the buffet. If a person has mobility issues an able bodied person fills the mobility issues person’s plate for them and then goes back to fill their own plate. Parents tend to help the younger ones too.

Yep this is how it goes. Parents of young children eat last and hope there is enough to go around. It reminds me of that line in A Christmas Story "my mother hasn't had a hot meal for herself in 15 years". After you get everyone what they want, cut their food, and get them settled then you can fill your own plate if others aren't already making their way for seconds.

You guys have some paltry gatherings, and some unhelpful guests. I have two kids, and DH and I each make a plate for them and then go through the line. It doesn’t take that long to go through the line, even if there are 18 people or so. I’ve never NOT had a full, hot plate of food (and seconds) even when I was breastfeeding, and even when I was breastfeeding AND hosting. Those who ate earliest are willing to help do small things like hold a baby, refill a 5yo’s milk cup or whatever else a kid may need so that the parents can eat.

Big family with a lot of kids, some have 3, others up to 5. It's different for other people. 18 is a small gathering.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here,

We aren't going to get past the grace thing on one of the holiest days of the year with some of our elderly family members. We just aren't.

I don't think we have enough counter space for that, and the logistics would mean the line going into and out of the kitchen would be through the same door. I just don't see how serving that many people off kitchen counters works in many houses.

We do grace before the first person goes through the buffet. If a person has mobility issues an able bodied person fills the mobility issues person’s plate for them and then goes back to fill their own plate. Parents tend to help the younger ones too.

Yep this is how it goes. Parents of young children eat last and hope there is enough to go around. It reminds me of that line in A Christmas Story "my mother hasn't had a hot meal for herself in 15 years". After you get everyone what they want, cut their food, and get them settled then you can fill your own plate if others aren't already making their way for seconds.

You guys have some paltry gatherings, and some unhelpful guests. I have two kids, and DH and I each make a plate for them and then go through the line. It doesn’t take that long to go through the line, even if there are 18 people or so. I’ve never NOT had a full, hot plate of food (and seconds) even when I was breastfeeding, and even when I was breastfeeding AND hosting. Those who ate earliest are willing to help do small things like hold a baby, refill a 5yo’s milk cup or whatever else a kid may need so that the parents can eat.

Big family with a lot of kids, some have 3, others up to 5. It's different for other people. 18 is a small gathering.

Even weirder that with so many kids, parents aren’t helping other parents, grandparents and aunts/uncles aren’t pitching in, etc. With so many kids, what, no tweens and teens to lend a hand? Odd.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here,

We aren't going to get past the grace thing on one of the holiest days of the year with some of our elderly family members. We just aren't.

I don't think we have enough counter space for that, and the logistics would mean the line going into and out of the kitchen would be through the same door. I just don't see how serving that many people off kitchen counters works in many houses.

We do grace before the first person goes through the buffet. If a person has mobility issues an able bodied person fills the mobility issues person’s plate for them and then goes back to fill their own plate. Parents tend to help the younger ones too.

Yep this is how it goes. Parents of young children eat last and hope there is enough to go around. It reminds me of that line in A Christmas Story "my mother hasn't had a hot meal for herself in 15 years". After you get everyone what they want, cut their food, and get them settled then you can fill your own plate if others aren't already making their way for seconds.

You guys have some paltry gatherings, and some unhelpful guests. I have two kids, and DH and I each make a plate for them and then go through the line. It doesn’t take that long to go through the line, even if there are 18 people or so. I’ve never NOT had a full, hot plate of food (and seconds) even when I was breastfeeding, and even when I was breastfeeding AND hosting. Those who ate earliest are willing to help do small things like hold a baby, refill a 5yo’s milk cup or whatever else a kid may need so that the parents can eat.

Big family with a lot of kids, some have 3, others up to 5. It's different for other people. 18 is a small gathering.

What’s your excuse for not making/buying enough food? After one such meal you would think that people would pitch in and bring, like, a Honeybaked ham.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here,

We aren't going to get past the grace thing on one of the holiest days of the year with some of our elderly family members. We just aren't.

I don't think we have enough counter space for that, and the logistics would mean the line going into and out of the kitchen would be through the same door. I just don't see how serving that many people off kitchen counters works in many houses.

We do grace before the first person goes through the buffet. If a person has mobility issues an able bodied person fills the mobility issues person’s plate for them and then goes back to fill their own plate. Parents tend to help the younger ones too.

Yep this is how it goes. Parents of young children eat last and hope there is enough to go around. It reminds me of that line in A Christmas Story "my mother hasn't had a hot meal for herself in 15 years". After you get everyone what they want, cut their food, and get them settled then you can fill your own plate if others aren't already making their way for seconds.

You guys have some paltry gatherings, and some unhelpful guests. I have two kids, and DH and I each make a plate for them and then go through the line. It doesn’t take that long to go through the line, even if there are 18 people or so. I’ve never NOT had a full, hot plate of food (and seconds) even when I was breastfeeding, and even when I was breastfeeding AND hosting. Those who ate earliest are willing to help do small things like hold a baby, refill a 5yo’s milk cup or whatever else a kid may need so that the parents can eat.

Big family with a lot of kids, some have 3, others up to 5. It's different for other people. 18 is a small gathering.

What’s your excuse for not making/buying enough food? After one such meal you would think that people would pitch in and bring, like, a Honeybaked ham.

What do you want to fight about it? Lighten up, Francis.

[Anonymous]

When I’ve done fancy buffets for 20-50 people (I host a lot of showers) I put the food on my huge island in my kitchen. People go around both sides and then I have tables in my dining and living room. I normally put desserts on my dining room buffet. I still have rolls, salt and pepper and butter spaced out on the tables. Plus great centerpieces.

For smaller buffets I use my buffet in my dining room. I can fit about 5 dishes on there and the turkey/ham in the middle of the table.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:When I’ve done fancy buffets for 20-50 people (I host a lot of showers) I put the food on my huge island in my kitchen. People go around both sides and then I have tables in my dining and living room. I normally put desserts on my dining room buffet. I still have rolls, salt and pepper and butter spaced out on the tables. Plus great centerpieces.

For smaller buffets I use my buffet in my dining room. I can fit about 5 dishes on there and the turkey/ham in the middle of the table.

My island is 9’ long and 4’ wide. Seems pretty standard in nice kitchens in the suburbs. And regarding food staying warm, buy food warmers and sternos

We say grace before people get food and that’s how I’ve always seen it done. You aren’t supposed to plate your food before grace.

[Anonymous]

Very religious Southerner here

We bless the food standing in the kitchen/room where the food is and then everyone makes their plates and goes to sit. Food has been blessed so you eat when you sit and don’t need to wait til everyone else is seated

[Anonymous]

I didn’t read your original thread, op - I can’t even imagine why it would be “mean” to serve foods “kids don’t like” (don’t different kids like different foods, and can’t everyone kid or adult just not take the foods they don’t like?). But, my family has always had an adults table and a kids table (which is littles through college aged). The kids table gets platters/bowls of all the same foods as the adults table, but I suppose you could leave off whatever foods are considered mean to serve to kids (ha). Anyway, this eliminates the need for a buffet, which I think it very annoying with a large crowd because some people sit around waiting for everyone to serve themselves and return to the table.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you don’t have a kitchen island, borrow two card tables from the neighbors. Bam: a kitchen island.

Most people who don’t have kitchens big enough for islands don’t have kitchens big enough to set up card tables in. Are you really that isolated from the middle class?

I don't understand the "lack of space" problem. The alternative to buffet style is that the host essentially walks through the kitchen as though it is a buffet making plates for people, right?

So just leave the food exactly where it would be for that to happen.

No we just put the food on the tables and pass things around.

No one is making plates for other people, unless you are adding a food to the plate of a small child or elder next to you at their request.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, we host a lot throughout the year and we have large number of people invited to any event. And we also do a lot of organized potluck meals. We almost always serve buffet style.

We mainly use chafing dishes to set food on islands or tables before the party starts so that we don't have to reheat. Refills are warmed in the oven and kept on a simmer. Appetizers are served in one area, entrees in another, desserts and drinks in yet another area - this keeps people from congregating in the same place. Elderly and kids go first and are served by able bodied adults. You can certainly have seperate seating areas for the comfort of kids and elderly when they are eating.

(In our social circle, it is common for a few moms to serve and feed all kids, in one place, at one time - before everyone else get to eat. Feeding children and elderly first is a community responsibility lol.) _

Another tip is that since we usually have a huge amount of extra food, there is never any danger of food running out. Which means that no one is jumping the line to get to food. We also keep a lot of tupperware (or disposable plastic containers) handy to pack leftovers. People who are interested in taking food home after the event can just pick up the disposable containers filled with food. This prevents the host from being stuck with lots of leftovers. It also gives most people a break from cooking the next day. Everything is taken care of.

Why moms? Are dads not invited? I thought it was a “community” responsibility, and the way you’ve painted it is women’s work.

Try and pull that stick out from your butt. Everything is not a gender war. What kind of community and family do you belong to?

Yes, it is usually the moms of younger kids who will herd the kids together and make sure they all eat. Dads usually get the heavier job of setting up the chairs and tables, filling the coolers with ice and drinks and taking out the trash/recycling. They also organizing outdoor games and man the grill most times. Happy?

There is always a poster who has a shitty life and they are looking to find faults with everything. I pity them and feel glad that I do not live their angry lives.

[Anonymous]

We used to have 40 people at Thanksgiving. Food was set up on the kitchen island, people dished up and then sat at the dining table or the ancillary card tables. It works fine.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you don’t have a kitchen island, borrow two card tables from the neighbors. Bam: a kitchen island.

Most people who don’t have kitchens big enough for islands don’t have kitchens big enough to set up card tables in. Are you really that isolated from the middle class?

Hi, literal minded, unresourceful one: how about two card tables set up in the living room, or even a long hallway, pushed against a wall? Honestly, do you ever try to be creative or resourceful?

Right? We used to have card tables all over the house for Thanksgiving (3-4 dozen people, decidedly working- and middle-class). Food served from the kitchen counters. Middle-class people have kitchen islands, or sideboards/buffet tables, and more than one room in the house.

[Anonymous]

Page 4 and we've moved into the responders who haven't read OP's post. Small galley kitchen - no island. Smallish house, with tables set up in multiple rooms for dining. Using your 9' long huge kitchen island isn't an option, nor is using the large buffet in the formal dining room.

It sounds like we're dealing with grandparents' 1960s era home hosting all their extended family. OP, you can do this! Agree that you loosely gather for grace and then figure out the buffet line. Parents help little kids. Chances are one or two of the main cooks hang in the kitchen to assist with plating, at least in my experience.

If the family generally gets along you'll all be talking anyway whether you're seated and passing serving dishes, or jostling past one another. It works.