BTDT MS and HS parents: Please tell us about the rules you made with your kids about cell phone use

[Anonymous]

This is a spinoff of another thread, where some parents were saying that they made good rules/boundaries/contracts with their MS or HS kid before getting them a phone.

My MS kid has no phone, but next year may transfer to a school that is tech-heavy and I can see a phone will be needed. I want to get these boundaries right on the first try, if I can, so I'd love to hear some of the rules or terms you put in any deals you had with your kid regarding phone use. So I guess stuff like, does the phone go in the bedroom, do you have phone hours (like not after 9pm), rules on texting, Instagram, what apps are yes and what are no, etc. And consequences for breaking rules. And anything else!

I recognize that some parents will be more strict than others and that each family is different, so I'd like to encourage a wide variety of responses, from super-strict to super-lax.

Thanks!

[Anonymous]

Big one: The phone gets left downstairs at bed time.

We have an app on the phone to try to block the most horrific sites. That doesn't stop any of the friends from accessing things on their phones, of course.

Social media is limited.

We let him know that at any time, we may pick up the phone and look at whatever's on it if we have a concern, as we are responsible for his safety while he's a minor. That said, we don't look into his phone.