Feeling bad for MIL on Thanksgiving

[Anonymous]

My FIL is flying to our house for Thanksgiving, and SIL is most likely going to spend it with her fiance's family. She just moved into her own place, so she may not see MIL at all on Thanksgiving. MIL and FIL have been married for almost 40 years, and I just feel bad for MIL that she is going to be all alone. From my perspective, their marriage is more out of duty and doesn't seem to have a lot of love. My MIL is very kind to me and we have a good relationship. I am upset that FIL decided he can come to our house for Thanksgiving and leave his wife alone. It's going to be me, him, DH, and baby DD, and we're going to go to a restaurant instead of worrying about cooking any food for just 3 adults, and FIL is staying in a hotel (his choice) so hosting him will not be a burden. FIL is nice as well, and generous, so I'm really just ranting here and realizing that my sweet and kind MIL is probably really sad right now thinking about how she'll be alone on Thanksgiving. I would be livid if my nest were empty and DH decided to go somewhere without me!

[Anonymous]

Why didn't she come?

[Anonymous]

Why didn't she come as well? That's really strange.

[Anonymous]

Why didn't she come? How could your husband be okay with this arrangement? I would def lose respect for DH if he allowed this to happen.

[Anonymous]

She might be looking forward to having some alone time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:She might be looking forward to having some alone time.

+1. I would looove that.

[Anonymous]

Did you ask her to come?

[Anonymous]

Um, you shouldn't feel bad. Your FIL is the one who is ditching her. Why didn't she come too?

[Anonymous]

Don't project your feelings on someone else.

Did you fail to invite? She is a grown woman and can make her own plans/decisions.

[Anonymous]

OP here, forgot to mention that by the time FIL decided to come, MIL wasn't able to take time off work. He could have just as well decided to stay with her.

[Anonymous]

Can you send her some flowers? Some sort of "thinking of you" delivery? The situation is certainly weird, though honestly these days being alone sounds delicious, but I have a couple of little ones who don't even let me pee by myself.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Can you send her some flowers? Some sort of "thinking of you" delivery? The situation is certainly weird, though honestly these days being alone sounds delicious, but I have a couple of little ones who don't even let me pee by myself.

Good idea.

Also try to call/skype with grandkids or something that day, so she can feel part of the holiday.

[Anonymous]

She is probably dancing naked around the house!!!

[Anonymous]

Bring out the cabana boys!

[Anonymous]

As PP said, you need to stop projecting. She may enjoy having some time to herself - I would. You also shouldn't be angry/upset/bothered by you FIL. Their marriage isn't your business.