How to thank our parents for a year of help?

[Anonymous]

We had preemie twins last year, with a toddler at home already. The twins are approaching their first birthday, and, thank goodness, everyone is healthy and doing well. But I really don't know how we would have done it without my parents and in-laws, especially in the beginning. They all live in the area, and they provided amazing amounts of logistical and emotional support. They babysat, cooked for us, cleaned our house, everything. Even now they're a huge help. Yes, we know how lucky we are!

So, we would like to thank them for all of their amazing support. But we are pretty stretched financially right now with three in childcare. Our parents are financially comfortable (more so than us at the moment) and there's nothing we could afford to buy them that they can't just buy themselves. Plus I know they wouldn't want us to spend a lot of money on them, when it could go to the grandkids' college fund. And to be honest, we don't have a lot of time to spare right now either, though we're willing to devote whatever spare time we can manage to this for the next couple of weeks.

Any suggestions of something we could get them, or do for them, given those limitations?

[Anonymous]

I'm sure anything with your kid's pictures on them with the words "thank you" and a nice card with your written thanks is enough. You should do something simple and sincere. It will mean a lot

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm sure anything with your kid's pictures on them with the words "thank you" and a nice card with your written thanks is enough. You should do something simple and sincere. It will mean a lot

This

[Anonymous]

Aw! Maybe a speech at their first birthday party?

[Anonymous]

A framed photo of your family.

[Anonymous]

It's just so nice to hear a genuine voice on this list-serve. Thank you for not being an entitled person. I know of people who speak of the help they get from family and say "their gift is getting to spend time with our children." As if these people don't have lives and friends and jobs and places they want to visit. Thank you for being so kind and thoughtful.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:A framed photo of your family.

And, depending on how the grandparents feel about photographs, making an effort (maybe even a professional photographer) to get a picture of the grandparents with the grandchildren.

[Anonymous]

I agree that the first birthday is a great occasion to do something. Get a photo done with all three kids, frame it and include a lovely card for each of them individully telling them exactly what their support has meant to you. Maybe include something from the kids like handprints. Just letting them know that their hard work has had the intended effect--to forever cement them in the hearts of their kids and grandkids--is enough.

[Anonymous]

Why not have both sets of parents over for a nice dinner and just say thanks

[Anonymous]

OP, I'm sure others will have some great ideas, but I just wanted to say how thoughtful I found your post. I was someone who put in a similar effort when my nephew was born, but it went unappreciated. When I stopped giving my time, I was called names and ignored, rather than gratitude.

I think it's important to never, ever underestimate telling people you not only appreciate them, but you acknowledge that it's not an expected given. You're very lucky to have had their support - tell them that. Reiterate it.

[Anonymous]

I agree with the other suggestions. Nice photo and heartfelt note plus afafamily dinner at your house. You can cook or do semi homemade stuff like Costco or Trader Joe's frozen food.

[Anonymous]

maybe a photo slideshow? its more than a framed photo and always sentimental. you could invite them over for a dinner or a dessert and then share it with them. also, hand or foot print art from the kids.

[Anonymous]

I would frame a picture of the kids with each set of grandparents and attach a thank you note to the back.

[Anonymous]

OP here. Thanks for the suggestions! I like the idea of a sincere note and a homemade (or homemade-ish) dinner. You're all probably right that simple is better. The photo idea is nice too, except that my mother-in-law is a very good amateur photographer and enjoys taking photos of the kids and printing out her favorites. Not only do they already have tons of photos in their house, but most of the photos we (and my parents) have are also from her. But maybe something like a photo mug, or travel mug, or calendar? Like one of these things: http://www.shutterfly.com/photo-gifts. Has anyone gotten anything particularly nice along those lines?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Thanks for the suggestions! I like the idea of a sincere note and a homemade (or homemade-ish) dinner. You're all probably right that simple is better. The photo idea is nice too, except that my mother-in-law is a very good amateur photographer and enjoys taking photos of the kids and printing out her favorites. Not only do they already have tons of photos in their house, but most of the photos we (and my parents) have are also from her. But maybe something like a photo mug, or travel mug, or calendar? Like one of these things: http://www.shutterfly.com/photo-gifts. Has anyone gotten anything particularly nice along those lines?

We've done photo gifts from Shutterfly for the grandparents. On the one hand it's kind of like, who needs another coffee mug. BUT it's my mom's favorite coffee mug, so I consider it money well spent. The other two "hits" were a photo Christmas tree ornament and a desk calendar. Yeah, they're kind of tchotchkes, but in our case the grandparents loved them. I made sure to use photos they hadn't seen.