when's too early for a newborn to sleep alone?

[Anonymous]

I am due with my first in two weeks. We're planning to have the newborn in a bassinet in our room for 6 weeks or so before transitioning to the crib, which is in the nursery.
Is that too early for the baby to be on its own?

[Anonymous]

Totally depends on your comfort level. Some sleep in their own room from day one. Be prepared to feel differently after you have the baby, though. We planned to have ours in our room for 1 month, which turned into 4 and a half. That maternal instinct can do crazy things!

[Anonymous]

It's actually recommended that the baby stay in the parents room for a few months (around 4, but ideally up to 6) to prevent SIDS. Sleeping in the parents' room is a proven SIDS reducer.

[Anonymous]

My DD slept in her crib from day 1. With the bumpers in and with a swaddling blanket. She is a thriving 8 mos. old. There are others out there with thriving children who co-slept or who slept in bassinet in parents' room

This is purely what is your comfort level.

[Anonymous]

the baby can sleep on its own from the beginning but most people find it easier esp. if you plan to breastfeed to keep him/her nearby. Also, you are so tired that it is easier than getting up and getting him/her every couple of hours. But there is no medical reason to not let him "slepp alone".

[Anonymous]

I would appreciate if the PP that mentioned the risk of SIDS would post some evidence of the validity of that statement.

[Anonymous]

I'm not the PP, but the American SIDS Institute does recommend keeping the infant in the mother's room until at least 6 months of age. The specific recommendation says: "Keep your baby’s crib in the parents’ room until the infant is at least 6 months of age. Studies clearly show that infants are safest when their beds are close to their mothers."

This and other prevention information is available on their website:

http://www.sids.org/nprevent.htm

[Anonymous]

Here's one recent review (it mentions room sharing, but in the abstract, doesn't say until when)

http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/17980736?ordinalpos=7&itool=EntrezSystem2.PEntrez.Pubmed.Pubmed_ResultsPanel.Pubmed_RVDocSum


Some others:

http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/8531589?ordinalpos=17&itool=EntrezSystem2.PEntrez.Pubmed.Pubmed_ResultsPanel.Pubmed_RVDocSum

http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/9487964?ordinalpos=16&itool=EntrezSystem2.PEntrez.Pubmed.Pubmed_ResultsPanel.Pubmed_RVDocSum

[Anonymous]

I'm not the original poster about the SIDS recommendation but I know I read that somewhere when I was pregnant with my first. We ended up keeping our in his pac and play in our room for the first six months and then moved him to his crib. I completely agree with the PP's who say it is really up to your comfort level. The way our condo was designed the 2 bedrooms are on completely opposite ends of the unit. Without the baby monitor there is no way I would have been able to here him. Even after we moved him I would still get up at least once a night to make sure he was breathing. At that point he was sleeping through the night.

I also breast fed so it was much easier to have him right there for those night time feedings. I have friends all over the spectrum. Still co-sleeping at 2+ and in the crib in the room next door from day 1. Just wait and see what works for you once the baby is born. Good luck with your delivery.

[Anonymous]

Thanks, everyone. OP here and my concern has to do with SIDS of course, but following that, I also wonder if having the baby in the same room after a certain point..say, 3-4 months might create a so-called unhealthy attachment where the child then refuses to sleep in another room. My cousin's baby is 10 months old and sleeps in the same room as the parents. The result has been that she couldn't handle daycare and had to be pulled out and won't go to anyone other than the parents and the nanny.

Has anyone encountered any such issues? Would you know of any scientific studies that discuss this? Thanks!

[Anonymous]

Sounds like your cousin's baby is going through separation anxiety - which is quite normal and very common. I don't think it has to do with whether the baby slept in the parent's room or not. It tends to mean that the baby has formed strong and healthy attachments to his/her primary caregivers.

[Anonymous]

The 15:48 poster is right. There is no way to logically draw the inference that this situation is due to the infant sleeping in the parents' room. As far as your second question, I know of no studies that suggest such a link. I certainly don't know of any reputable research suggesting that this could cause an "unhealthy attachment." If you are at all familiar with the attachment literature, you will surely see the fallacy here.

I don't think I would worry about this, OP. I personally would follow the recommendations of SIDS experts and keep the infant in the room with me for at least the first 6 months. I would also say that you will have to wait until your baby arrives and see what he or she is like in terms of temperament, as well as how things work out for you with nursing and other early infancy issues. In other words, I wouldn't worry about creating dependence (which is essentially impossible in the first 12 months anyway), and I wouldn't try to decide right now how long you will have your baby in the room with you.

[Anonymous]

My baby slept on his own in his crib in his room next door from day one. We simply could not sleep in the same room with him - both my husband and I would wake up for every movement, sound, whimper, etc. BOTH of us would have been extremely sleep deprived. With him in the next room, we could easily hear him when he cried and only one of us had to be awake to attend to him. It worked really well for us and our baby is a great sleeper, but it may not work for everyone or for every baby. You have to do what is right for you and your family.

[Anonymous]

our son slept in our room in a bassinet/co-sleeper for the first 8 mos of life and i'll do the same with this baby who is due in 6 weeks (may even let this baby sleep in our room longer) my 3yo also co-slept with us for about 8 mos this past year but is now in his big boy bed and he loves it...i love the research from dr james mckenna from the maternal infant sleep center:

http://www.nd.edu/~jmckenn1/lab/articles.html

also, an infant who protests while being away from his mother doesnt have an "unhealthy attachment", quite the opposite, it means they are securely attached and expecting them to immediately assimilate to strangers is not a biologically indicated survival mechanism...you will slowly learn there are many different beliefs, styles, philosophies out there on infant care and mothering, you will choose what is best for you...i found the book "our babies ourselves" to be a wonderful cross cultural look at how most mothers around the globe co=sleep, nurse and wear their babies more and we are a very low touch society here in the US=even with our infants, ironically, we have a much higher rate of "crib death" than many countries that co=sleep (referenced from ourbabies ourselves, Small and Dr. James Mckenna, Dr. Sears, etc)

best of luck to you but please dont think that having a nursing baby by your side at night while they are totally dependent on you for their survival and nutrition is in anyway a bad habit, quite the contrary, if you meet your child's early dependency needs, they will evolve to the next stage of development in a very capable way!

[Anonymous]

My DS is 15 months and sleeps in a crib in our room. It wasn't exactly planned, but at first it was easier b/c I was nursing. Then, we were doing renovations (just ended) and our bedroom was the only bedroom not affected. Anyway, our DS started daycare at 6 months without any issues. He's comfortable with a number of different caregivers and although prefers his Dad or I when we are around, will happily go to new people. So, I don't think there is a tie between havign the baby sleep in your room and them being overly attached to parents.

Now, the sleep books do say that sleeping attachments form around month 3. So, if you are sure you do not want to share your room long term (and your mind might change!) I think around 3 months or before would be good to make the transition.

My sister and I both sleep in cribs in our own rooms from day 1 and weren't damaged by that either...so, I think it is what you feel comfortable with.