Did you ramp up at work once the kids were older/gone?

Anonymous
I am considering a move at work that will definitely mommy-track me. While this is desireable in the short-term (or maybe even long term), I don't see me being happy for the rest of my working life (I'm upper 30s now) with such a reduced area of responsibility. Does anyone have stories to share about how they were able to recharge their career after being on the mommy track for a long time? I worry that if I pull back for 5 to 10 years now, that I will face age discrimination when I'm ready to be more dedicated to my career.
Anonymous
I will be 55 when my last child leaves the nest. I have zero interest in ramping up at that time - I will have worked for 30 years straight at that point! Good luck figuring out what you want.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:I will be 55 when my last child leaves the nest. I have zero interest in ramping up at that time - I will have worked for 30 years straight at that point! Good luck figuring out what you want.


I'm right there with you. I'm 42 now with 2 elem kids. There is a rumor going around at work that we're going to be bought. If it happens and my job is no longer an option, I think I'm going to become a SAHM. I just don't have the energy to prove myself again.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:I am considering a move at work that will definitely mommy-track me. While this is desireable in the short-term (or maybe even long term), I don't see me being happy for the rest of my working life (I'm upper 30s now) with such a reduced area of responsibility. Does anyone have stories to share about how they were able to recharge their career after being on the mommy track for a long time? I worry that if I pull back for 5 to 10 years now, that I will face age discrimination when I'm ready to be more dedicated to my career.


I am in mid 50s. I cannot imagine wanting to "ramp up" now that kids are gone. I am struggling to keep a job and not get let go. Constant stress and conflict. Many people fired and let go, mostly older, expensive workers.

I am really curious as to what type of work/careers one would have that they would want to work more hours when they are in their 50's. I don't know of anyone in our circle that is enjoying their work. It is like an urban legend around northern virginia.
Anonymous
We are both 58. DH has had some very exciting opportunities lately. But the end goal is out, not more work. He is very excited about what he is doing, but he does not have the stamina to keep working many hours. I think in the next year or so, he will retire, or work part time. It has been 36 years.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:I am considering a move at work that will definitely mommy-track me. While this is desireable in the short-term (or maybe even long term), I don't see me being happy for the rest of my working life (I'm upper 30s now) with such a reduced area of responsibility. Does anyone have stories to share about how they were able to recharge their career after being on the mommy track for a long time? I worry that if I pull back for 5 to 10 years now, that I will face age discrimination when I'm ready to be more dedicated to my career.


OP Your 40s are make or break time. You can't really wait until you are 50. (Unless you are the very unusual one) GL.
Anonymous
I actually ramped up after my son turned 3, took a less intensive job ages 7-11. Jumped up again after that. The last 4 years have been great and I will be turning 55. This has been a great time for my career in so many ways and my son's independence has helped so much. I think you have to also look at what is your definition of success. I am just on my game and loving how it is all working. But I am not in Big Law which I think is very hard for parents.
Anonymous
And yes, there is age discrimination, subtle but strong. I have had to prove myself this go round in ways I have not had to do before. But it did take me by surprise, especially since I was getting compared to people 15 years younger than I am. But hey, I have the talent and now also the experience, so it has worked out for me. Not sure if I could have done it with 2 kids.
Anonymous
I'm mid 40s and took on increased work when youngest was in middle school. My workload balanced well with her increasing need for independence.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I am considering a move at work that will definitely mommy-track me. While this is desireable in the short-term (or maybe even long term), I don't see me being happy for the rest of my working life (I'm upper 30s now) with such a reduced area of responsibility. Does anyone have stories to share about how they were able to recharge their career after being on the mommy track for a long time? I worry that if I pull back for 5 to 10 years now, that I will face age discrimination when I'm ready to be more dedicated to my career.


OP Your 40s are make or break time. You can't really wait until you are 50. (Unless you are the very unusual one) GL.


I agree. That's why having a good career while you are raising teens is so difficult.
Anonymous
No way! I just turned 50 and am looking to retire as soon as I can. I cut back to part-time after my son was born, in my early 40s, and haven't ramped back up - I have too much fun at his games and activities to want to work more.
Anonymous
After struggling with the kid/work balance for 20+ years and enduring the subtle and not so subtle discrimination against working women, I am now at 57 at a point where I have the time to focus and totally enjoy my work, and I do. But I look around and see my peers retiring and wonder if I am missing something? This is the most fun I have had at work since the kids were born, I am no longer torn all the time with work home issues, and I have to make up for that pay differential I was denied all those years. So until I win the lottery or I die, here I stay and I dont mind a bit!
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:I'm mid 40s and took on increased work when youngest was in middle school. My workload balanced well with her increasing need for independence.


Oh well that's different. I've worked 40+ hours a week other than maternity leaves since my children were born. No need to ramp up once the kids got older/go to college.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:After struggling with the kid/work balance for 20+ years and enduring the subtle and not so subtle discrimination against working women, I am now at 57 at a point where I have the time to focus and totally enjoy my work, and I do. But I look around and see my peers retiring and wonder if I am missing something? This is the most fun I have had at work since the kids were born, I am no longer torn all the time with work home issues, and I have to make up for that pay differential I was denied all those years. So until I win the lottery or I die, here I stay and I dont mind a bit!


I feel burned out already, and I'm only 50. Then again, my retirement is almost taken care of, so I don't need to work for the money any more.
Anonymous
OP, you have doubts so I wouldn't do it. People who scale back, if it's their choice, have a feeling of joy and relief.

It sounds like you're conflicted. I wouldn't then.
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