Sibling with BPD -- what kind of job how to self support. Starbucks
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Anonymous
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So I have a sibling with serious depression and borderling personality disorder/dependency issues. Cannot self-motivate, but will do excellent work if directed or managed closely (got through law school but to a large part b/c of our mother giving her coaching and encouragement 24/7; smart but feels empty and about everything, i think the lack of sense of self of bpd).
Lost current job, looking for another, thinking of moving back hometown and just working at starbucks (we think they have ok medical insurance?). Any insight on that kind of job? How flexible are they with scheduling, or do they tend to dictate shifts (I kind of expect this but don't know). We can't afford to support sibling, so if no job, there is no one else to care for them or for them to go. I guess they end up on medicaire, and ss disability, maybe staying in section 8 housing? |
Anonymous
| Yes they dictate shifts and use computerized scheduling. At most stores there will be a few employees who work a set full time schedule, but new people tend to work variable schedule with a variable number of hours. Customer service is hard-you have to smile through a lot of negativity from customers. A low level admin job might be a better environment. |
Anonymous
I agree, but those jobs are fairly competitive and actually do require problem solving and self motivation (admins do a lot of work generally now when they are hired). |
Anonymous
| Honestly your best bet may be McDonald's... They have health insurance (they will have it deducted from paycheck) and they work around most schedules |
Anonymous
| If she has a law degree, I would try her out on document review projects as a temp. She can make enough money doing that to afford insurance, if her agency doesn't offer it. (Most do.) |
Anonymous
OP, first, kudos for trying to figure out how to help your sib. That's good. Second, depending on your hometown/state will determine your sib's access to Medicare, SS disability, Section 8, etc. First, Medicare is only available for seniors. Not clear that your sib's condition would qualify for Medicaid. One has to demonstrate profound disability for that. Mental health is considered, but, alas, folks not sympathetic to depression. Very tough to get SS disability - and bureaucrats, backed by Congress, believe most unemployed folks are lazy as opposed to having physical and mental challenges that may preclude ability to work (in addition to there not being enough jobs for the able-bodied). Section 8 waitlists are super long and nearly impossible to ever get off on in major urban areas. Not saying this to discourage you, but to be realistic in that your sib's best bet may be a position w/o a lot of flexibility in beginning. |
Anonymous
how does borderline personality disorder manifest? |
Anonymous
Black/white thinking, self-hatred, binging, multiple suicide attempts. Dependent personality disorder symptoms too Also, wanting to sleep all day and always looking for someone to make their decisions for them and do things for them. sib callled mom 2-3 times a day to grouse about the day and get advice on what to do. Looking to find someone else to fill that roll. How does document review temps work? |
Anonymous
Wait, she has to pass the bar to be a document review attorney right, that is not going to happen I'm afraid. |
Anonymous
Some doc review jobs only require a JD. |
Anonymous
Cool, how do we track these down, indeed.com? |
Anonymous
Preference would be for jobs in Maine, maybe Boston |
Anonymous
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Keep her as high-functioning as possible. I wouldn't fall back into Starbucks/McDonald's work unless she absolutely failed at everything else. What insurance does she have now? Can you help her find a therapist who is willing to play the part your mother has up until now? My brother had a very pushy therapist when he was a teen. Even now I think how almost unprofessional it was, the way he made demands of my brother instead of the sort of gentle prodding I've received in therapy. But it worked! It worked like a charm, and my brother was diagnosed as with BPD at the time as well. Can you hire a pushy housekeeper? A weekly life coach? Basically, by settling for the Starbucks/McDonald's track, aren't you simply asking the managers there to play the role of constantly motivating and directing your sister? I don't see how that's their job or how it would be sustainable. How able is she? Truly? Could she function in a low stress environment, so not law, but maybe as a case worker (more simple paper pushing than you would think)? We live up to or down to the expectations set before us, OP. Keep her aiming high for as long as you can. She may drop from wherever you place her, so make sure you work towards her maximum capacity. |
Anonymous
Boston will have more options re: doc review. Look at the various vendors that staff document review projects such as Kelly, Hudson, ect. Once your sister's resume is on file, the agencies will assist placing her. |
Anonymous
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Look into vocational rehabilitation in the state or county where she lives. They might be able to help with supportive work, job coaching, and aptitude testing.
If she flames out, it could help bolster an application for disability benefits (which could eventually lead to Medicaid and/or Medicare). But it's not that easy for people to get benefits, especially if they are young and well-educated. |