negativity surrounding school from parents

[Anonymous]

I have two little boys who are not school age yet (4 and 1) and I'm so sick of hearing negative things about the schools around here. It seems that all I hear from my colleagues and my kids' daycare teachers (these are all parents with school-age children who live in DC, Maryland, and Virginia) are negative experiences. Things like: expectations are too high, teachers are sub-par, parents are too involved, parents are not involved enough, all they do is take tests, teachers are great but administrators are terrible, too much pressure, the curriculum doesn't make sense, etc. I'm trying very hard to keep a positive attitude about sending my boys to school, but it's getting difficult.

Can people share some positive experiences? We are in FFX county, but since I've heard negative from all school districts, positive stories from anywhere would be great!

[Anonymous]

We're in MoCo, and with Common Core (or 2.0 here), there's negativity galore. But, I don't stress. Maybe it's because I'm not originally from this area. Parents around here seem to constantly complain about every aspect of the schools.

If you look at the different rankings of best school districts, you will find that MD is usually at the top, probably VA, too. So compared to the rest of the country, it's not so bad here. I think some people don't realize this. Not saying we shouldn't strive to make schools better, but all that negativity can't be good for the kids.

My one DC is in HGC, and quite happy there. DC#2 is in 2nd and quite happy at the home school, too, and so far, doing really well, academically, socially, and emotionally at school.

But again, we're not originally from here, and we haven't drunk the ivy league kool-aid (which is IMO part of the problem around here with all the criticism). And we realize this is public education, and my DCs are not special snowflakes (they are but, only to our family).

Don't stress about it, especially, since they are only 1 and 4.

[Anonymous]

OP, it will almost certainly be ok. Really! I'm also in Montgomery County, and I've been very satisfied with the education my children have received so far. One is in elementary school, and one is in middle school. Are things perfect? No, but I don't expect perfection. And, as the PP points out, even with our problems, we're still much better off than most of the rest of the country.

[Anonymous]

It gives everyone something to talk about. Motherhood isn't for sissys (sissies, spelling?)

[Anonymous]

I think it's because there's a lot of status anxiety around here. It translates into the irrational fear that something about the teacher or the curriculum is going to hold back your kid and then he won't achieve his full potential and get into Harvard, so he'll just be a big fat failure, or something. Plus, the internet is full of unhappy stories but not too many happy ones. It's a very different environment than when I was a kid. I can't even imagine my parents looking up the average scores at our elementary school before we moved there, or the number of kids on free lunch, or the matriculation rates to Ivy League schools. And yet somehow we got educated and built good careers and had good lives. If you hear complaints, first consider the source. If it's someone who seems to have this kind of status anxiety about other things, that's probably it.

For us: average rated public elementary school in Montgomery County, very warm community and kids who are happy to go to school, reading at a high level, developing a lot of interests and asking important questions. It's all good. I do get annoyed with common core math homework, though. It's not how I was taught so I don't know how to help them with it.

[Anonymous]

Why is someone with no ES age kids even posting this? What a waste of time. Post back when you have some actual experience of your own. Real life just might surprise you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why is someone with no ES age kids even posting this? What a waste of time. Post back when you have some actual experience of your own. Real life just might surprise you.

Pp, you're a jerk, YOU go away.

OP,
I'm in fcps. My son is in third grade. I love his teacher and I think his school is pretty good. He went there in second grade too, and his second grade teacher was awesome too. His first school was in md and I hated that school, so we moved. Dh and I researched to find a home in a neighborhood with a school we liked. I also spoke to the office about what expectations I had for my son and the kind of teacher that I think will be a best fit for him, and this does make a difference. His teacher this year is a very laid back teacher. I was really impressed by her at btsn. I was worried because third grade is when the sols begin. At btsn a parent asked about the sols and she said "don't worry about it, that's my job" she told her they would learn everything they need to know in the classroom. She REALLY made an effort to make the parents feel relaxed about it. She also said she doesn't assign unnecessary homework, but if it doesn't get done in class, it will come home. My son has come home with minimal homework so far, and he comes home happy everyday telling me how nice his teacher is. Fwiw, my son generally hates school and would rather be home playing and hanging out with me or his friends. He also isn't the best at math and reading, but he seems to be doing great with this teacher and the teacher he had last year.

My sons school is rated a 9 on great schools. It's a big school, so there are lots of teachers for each grade. The class sizes are about 25 - 26 in his second and third grade classes. There are 5 or 6 teachers each for second and third grade, so for me, it was worth it to speak to the office about my child's educational needs to get the right teacher. I told them he needed a patient, nurturing type of teacher as opposed to a strict, firm teacher and that's what they assigned my son to. Find a good school, be involved in your childrens education, and don't be afraid to speak up to get what you want. Good luck OP, it's not easy, but you can do it.

[Anonymous]

Here's a FCPS story. I was genuinely surprised to find some really outstanding teachers. Overall we are pleased even though yes, there have been duds too.

[Anonymous]

We are in DC, at a charter that we absolutely afore. It is our fourth year, and I have no big complaints. Of course there have been little hiccups at times, but nothing that wasn't resolved very quickly. I couldn't be happier.

[Anonymous]

OP, it gives them something to talk about. What is most important is what you are doing with your kid AT HOME. This will give them an edge that they cannot receive in any school.

[Anonymous]

1. People bond when critiquing a common experience. Have you noticed that?

2. There are real limitations to education that you should be aware of. I say this as a foreigner who has experienced different European and Asian school systems. Schools here, public and private, have low standards in elementary school, and the curriculum lacks rigor to an incredible degree, thereby putting the onus on individual teachers to teach it well, or not. As my 4th grader's teacher says - the MCPS 2.0 curriculum is all edu-speak!

3. Comparing standards here to the rest of the country is dangerously misleading, given the low rank of the US compared to other countries in terms of education. Don't forget the marketplace is increasingly global, and our adult children will compete with highly educated and high-achieving young people from all over the world.

So, yes, inform yourself, and parent your children well at home.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why is someone with no ES age kids even posting this? What a waste of time. Post back when you have some actual experience of your own. Real life just might surprise you.

NP here. We live in Alexandria (FFX) and have stressed for 2+ years about the poor Alexandria schools. We live on the FFX County side and FFX is supposedly one of the best school districts in the country. My child started kindergarten two weeks ago and I could not be more pleased. My child and I love the school, the teachers and the community. I wish I did not listen to all the negative chatter.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
1. People bond when critiquing a common experience. Have you noticed that?

2. There are real limitations to education that you should be aware of. I say this as a foreigner who has experienced different European and Asian school systems. Schools here, public and private, have low standards in elementary school, and the curriculum lacks rigor to an incredible degree, thereby putting the onus on individual teachers to teach it well, or not. As my 4th grader's teacher says - the MCPS 2.0 curriculum is all edu-speak!

3. Comparing standards here to the rest of the country is dangerously misleading, given the low rank of the US compared to other countries in terms of education. Don't forget the marketplace is increasingly global, and our adult children will compete with highly educated and high-achieving young people from all over the world.

So, yes, inform yourself, and parent your children well at home.

Good advice. And look at private schools.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
1. People bond when critiquing a common experience. Have you noticed that?

2. There are real limitations to education that you should be aware of. I say this as a foreigner who has experienced different European and Asian school systems. Schools here, public and private, have low standards in elementary school, and the curriculum lacks rigor to an incredible degree, thereby putting the onus on individual teachers to teach it well, or not. As my 4th grader's teacher says - the MCPS 2.0 curriculum is all edu-speak!

3. Comparing standards here to the rest of the country is dangerously misleading, given the low rank of the US compared to other countries in terms of education. Don't forget the marketplace is increasingly global, and our adult children will compete with highly educated and high-achieving young people from all over the world.

So, yes, inform yourself, and parent your children well at home.

+1000

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

1. People bond when critiquing a common experience. Have you noticed that?

2. There are real limitations to education that you should be aware of. I say this as a foreigner who has experienced different European and Asian school systems. Schools here, public and private, have low standards in elementary school, and the curriculum lacks rigor to an incredible degree, thereby putting the onus on individual teachers to teach it well, or not. As my 4th grader's teacher says - the MCPS 2.0 curriculum is all edu-speak!

3. Comparing standards here to the rest of the country is dangerously misleading, given the low rank of the US compared to other countries in terms of education. Don't forget the marketplace is increasingly global, and our adult children will compete with highly educated and high-achieving young people from all over the world.

So, yes, inform yourself, and parent your children well at home.

Good advice. And look at private schools.

Yes, go do that. I'm sure you'll find the untrained teachers there to be worth the tuition.