Even more beach house drama

[Anonymous]

The other threads seem to have died.

I SAH with twin 3yos. My husband travels for work about a week every month. He is on calls all the rest of the time and a lot of stuff simply falls on me. That's fine. But why on earth would I want to spend a week with his family? He will be on calls and working and leave me with the kids AND the in-laws. If it was free babysitting and I could go off too, well yeah. But it will be me trying to babyproof, stressing about what to feed them, their sleep, all away from home, with his parents, who have their own needy issues. No thanks. I'd rather stay home.

[Anonymous]

Do what you want. You're busy enough with 3 yo twin boys that you can call the shots.

No explanations necessary. Just "No, thanks".

[Anonymous]

We are currently at the beach with my parents. No drama, but I totally get the need to baby proof. We are staying in a colleagues house with a 3 year old and 1 year old. I am quickly learning these trips are not vacations, just relocations. The place is not baby proof and I feel like every other sentence is "don't touch that". On the plus side, my girls love the beach and pool. I can't wait for my ladies only beach trip in a few weeks, where I can actually sit on the beach in peace!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
Do what you want. You're busy enough with 3 yo twin boys that you can call the shots.

No explanations necessary. Just "No, thanks".

+1

You also need to tell him you need time w him. He needs to put away the ph or laptop.

[Anonymous]

Why are they inviting their DIL and grandkids to come to the beach with them if they didn't want to spend time with them? (especially the kids).

I can see sort of resenting your dh for not being there to run interference for you. I can see how the idea of spending a week caring for two 3 year olds AND trying to keep them safe and out of other people's hair...could be daunting.

But...and this is a big But because you know them... The in-laws might wind up being a being a much bigger help than you think they will be. Maybe they remember a thing or two about baby proofing and keeping the little ones entertained on a beach trip. Who knows? You might have a great time. Good luck.

[Anonymous]

I'm not getting why you would go to see the in-laws without your husband. Do they have a nice beach house? Or are they renting?

If it's their house, you could ask your DH to ask them to babyproof it. If it's a rental, you could beg off because it's tough to babyproof a rental you've never seen.

We almost rented a beach house with an upstairs gallery with only a handrail -- a disaster waiting to happen! Fortunately we saw it before renting. Perfect location, but we rented a smaller, safer house.

If DH is not going with you, I'd just say no thanks, I'll wait until DH can come too. End of story.

[Anonymous]

OP, I hear you. There should be a beach house for DIL's to visit when they are put through this hell called "vacation". Why do MIL's think they are doing anyone any favors? There is nothing pleasant about it, Lord knows I have tried to find something, anything to like about it

Don't go without DH if you don't want to. There is really no reason to, especially if the "grandparents" are not helpful; like my MIL, who just wants bragging rights about who attended and who didn't. Here we go again.

Sorry to hear, OP. You are not alone.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, I hear you. There should be a beach house for DIL's to visit when they are put through this hell called "vacation". Why do MIL's think they are doing anyone any favors? There is nothing pleasant about it, Lord knows I have tried to find something, anything to like about it

Don't go without DH if you don't want to. There is really no reason to, especially if the "grandparents" are not helpful; like my MIL, who just wants bragging rights about who attended and who didn't. Here we go again.

Sorry to hear, OP. You are not alone.

Yes! +1 million!

[Anonymous]

That sounds like torture. It is hard enough watching 3 year olds. Add in a non-baby proofed house and an absentee spouse AND your inlaws? NO THANK YOU.

[Anonymous]

Why not just spend the day at the beach and out of the house? That is why you ate going, right, to go play in the sand and water?

If ILs want to go to the water with you, fine. If not, fine. Just tell them you and the kids will be there till noon and you'll be back got lunch and nap/quiet time.

Stop at the grocery store/bring your own stuff for food so you have control over what the twins eat.

Not sure what the big deal is. Why do you feel the need to entertain or meet the ILs' needs just bc you are sharing a beach house?

[Anonymous]

OP, the IL of our IL's join under the condition that the filled cooler accompanies them!! Take note, there is a valid reason for that. Hint: it's NOT because they are impressed with the IL's company

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why not just spend the day at the beach and out of the house? That is why you ate going, right, to go play in the sand and water?

If ILs want to go to the water with you, fine. If not, fine. Just tell them you and the kids will be there till noon and you'll be back got lunch and nap/quiet time.

Stop at the grocery store/bring your own stuff for food so you have control over what the twins eat.

Not sure what the big deal is. Why do you feel the need to entertain or meet the ILs' needs just bc you are sharing a beach house?

So... you're suggesting that OP watches two three year olds at a strange beach by herself for multiple hours in order to avoid her inlaws. Sounds like fun. And sunburn.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why not just spend the day at the beach and out of the house? That is why you ate going, right, to go play in the sand and water?

If ILs want to go to the water with you, fine. If not, fine. Just tell them you and the kids will be there till noon and you'll be back got lunch and nap/quiet time.

Stop at the grocery store/bring your own stuff for food so you have control over what the twins eat.

Not sure what the big deal is. Why do you feel the need to entertain or meet the ILs' needs just bc you are sharing a beach house?

So... you're suggesting that OP watches two three year olds at a strange beach by herself for multiple hours in order to avoid her inlaws. Sounds like fun. And sunburn.

Why wouldn't OP be capable of watching her twins at the beach, alone or with DH? She is their mother, correct? Avoid sunburn with sunscreen and going in the AM or late afternoon.

[Anonymous]

What will the in laws be doing? Don't they want to hang out at the beach wither grandkids? Not necessarily babysit per se, but there for added company?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What will the in laws be doing? Don't they want to hang out at the beach wither grandkids? Not necessarily babysit per se, but there for added company?

Unfortunately, there are some grandparents, like my MIL, who would rather do crosswords than actually have memorable conversations with their grandchildren. Sad, but true.