restaurant thoughts for someone with agoraphobic tendencies

[Anonymous]

I have a friend who is coming to town. She is prone to anxiety attacks, particularly in crowds. I know, I too wish she could visit me in Wyoming... but alas I live here in Northern Virginia.

Are there any restaurants anyone can recommend that are quiet, staid, sleepy? We will obviously try to cook in as much as possible, but I want her to get out a teeny bit too. We're in Arlington so bonus points if I don't have to drive far.

TIA

[Anonymous]

How about a picnic somewhere instead of a restaurant? I don't know if you can bring food to the Mall, but I'm sure there are plenty of smaller places along the Potomac to go people watching.

Also, if you're looking for things to do - check out Wolf Trap's schedule. you can get lawn seats, have dinner and a show, and be able to bail if she gets nervous (although getting out of the crowded parking lot at the end of the show may be another issue,,,)

[Anonymous]

http://www.mccormickandschmicks.com/locations/washington-dc/arlington-virginia/crystaldrive.aspx

The restaurants in the surrounding strip are usually quiet on weekends. I think those restaurants make their money off the business people during the week.

[Anonymous]

Go early to eat, before the main dinner rush. Restaurants are usually open for dinner by 4:00 ish and pretty empty for the first 60-90 minutes. Plan your day to have a brunch and early dinner.

[Anonymous]

Is her ideal restaurant small and windowless? I'm not sure what an agoraphobic would want

[Anonymous]

I feel like you could go almost anywhere if you go at an off time. For a weekend dinner -- if you show up at 5:30-6, most places are empty as they don't start to fill up until after 7-8 pm.

Or as the PP suggested, go to places that are popular for business lunches; those places naturally do less business on the weekends.

[Anonymous]

It's about more than the restaurant.

My advice is to make it seamless. Go to a restaurant where you park in front of the restaurant (lot). Walk in. No wait. No huge crowd. Bathroom easy to find. Hop in car. Leave.

The fewer logistics the fewer issues.

[Anonymous]

Agree with avoiding dinner hours. Either go early bird special, or eat like a salad around 5 and then go out to dinner at 9pm.

But also be her real friend. Support her by giving her what she needs, which is no crowds. Don't decide you're going to push her out of her comfort zone by forcing her to go to restaurants if that's not what she wants.

[Anonymous]

http://www.washingtonpost.com/gog/restaurants/rabieng,794662.html

http://www.washingtonpost.com/gog/best-bets/quiet-restaurants,77889.html

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's about more than the restaurant.

My advice is to make it seamless. Go to a restaurant where you park in front of the restaurant (lot). Walk in. No wait. No huge crowd. Bathroom easy to find. Hop in car. Leave.

The fewer logistics the fewer issues.

This. All of it.

Find this restaurant and if you have the time, drive past it before the meal or at the very least, tell your friend about how simple and comforting you think this restaurant will be - it will be reassuring to know this. Emphasize an "out" - agoraphobics need an escape route and often just having some semblance of control goes a long way in making the situation comfortable and tolerable. It would help if you say, "if at any time you want to step outside..." or, "don't forget...my car's right there."

You're a good friend. I still struggle with agoraphobia and panic in crowded environments and/or situations that I imagine are hard to escape (formal, seated events, crowded movie theatres and concerts, enduring a crowded metro train) and had to take a Xanax before dining out with a group of friends last night. Sometimes keeping your fears hidden (and coming up with an excuse to bail or escaping mid meal or making last minute changes to an event like arriving late) exacerbates the agoraphobia.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's about more than the restaurant.

My advice is to make it seamless. Go to a restaurant where you park in front of the restaurant (lot). Walk in. No wait. No huge crowd. Bathroom easy to find. Hop in car. Leave.

The fewer logistics the fewer issues.

This. All of it.

Find this restaurant and if you have the time, drive past it before the meal or at the very least, tell your friend about how simple and comforting you think this restaurant will be - it will be reassuring to know this. Emphasize an "out" - agoraphobics need an escape route and often just having some semblance of control goes a long way in making the situation comfortable and tolerable. It would help if you say, "if at any time you want to step outside..." or, "don't forget...my car's right there."

You're a good friend. I still struggle with agoraphobia and panic in crowded environments and/or situations that I imagine are hard to escape (formal, seated events, crowded movie theatres and concerts, enduring a crowded metro train) and had to take a Xanax before dining out with a group of friends last night. Sometimes keeping your fears hidden (and coming up with an excuse to bail or escaping mid meal or making last minute changes to an event like arriving late) exacerbates the agoraphobia.

That's all very helpful. TY! I can easily do those things, so I appreciate the advice.

[Anonymous]

What restaurants have a few tables off in isolated nooks? I remember a few such tables at [now closed] Kinkead's, but can't think of any others...

[Anonymous]

Water & Wall feels pretty open - the tables are not crowded, lots of windows.

If you go early then you could easily get street parking right in front on Fairfax Dr.

Is it this weekend? It should be a pretty quiet time as long as you stay away from the Metro and downtown.

[Anonymous]

A PP mentioned Rabieng. They have really good Thai food.

[Anonymous]

McCormicks and Schmicks in Tysons has some tables that are in their own cubby type space with a curtain that closes to the main dining area. I am not describing it well but I also have anxiety issues and love them!