Math-challenged parents- how to best support our kids?
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Anonymous
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My husband and I are practically math-illiterate; it's sad and pathetic, but it is what it is at the moment. We both have grad degrees, but in social science disciplines. I did well in quite a few graduate-level statistics courses for my field, but grad school was a long time ago and any math ability has been completely lost. DH's two brothers are engineers but DH's talents lie elsewhere!
Our kids are in elementary school and while I may be getting ahead of myself, I forsee a time when neither of us will be able to help with their math homework. I remember sitting with my dad trying to go over math homework; I didn't understand it, he got frustrated and yelled, and I cried. I don't want that same experience for my own kids, but realize that DH and I have real limitations. Obviously we don't want to give them any preconceived notions about how difficult math is, even if that's true for ourselves. What is the best way to support our kids when it comes to the dreaded math? |
Anonymous
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Don't try to teach them. Tell them to ask their teacher for help with anything they don't understand. I'm an ex-math teacher and I saw so many kids get confused by others (parents, tutors, friends, etc.). If they're having a particularly hard time, ask the teacher to put some time aside for them or give them a good book they can use on their own. The teacher is your best resource.
In the meantime, play a lot of card games with them. And logic puzzles/games, etc. We can't all be good at everything! |
Anonymous
| For starters, don't act like it's "dreaded math." I was better than my parents at math starting in about the 4th grade. It's not a big deal. Your kids will get a few wrong or ask a teacher for help if needed. Some people will hire tutors--but I save that til high school. |
Anonymous
| I agree, don't try to teach them and do t try to help. Let the teacher know when your kids are having difficulty. When your kids get to HS, schools offer free tutors. |
Anonymous
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OP here. Don't worry- we won't be trying to teach them. I don't want to and even if I did, I couldn't.
I just meant- if and when our kids ask for her and we can't, what do we do? Btw, I would never call it the dreaded math to my kids- that's just how I think about it to myself. |
Anonymous
| You relearn it with them. It's not difficult. |
Anonymous
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The good news is that there are so many online programs (e.g. Khan Academy, Brainpop, etc.) and apps that can do most of the explaining. There are tutoring centers and some good explanations in workbooks.
Here's a big don't (courtesy of my mother!)-- don't imply that you are not "good" at math. Double-don't imply that your child is not "good" at math. A big "do"- emphasize that math competency and mastery takes patience and hard work. For everyone. Even the math majors I saw in college and grad school did not breeze through higher order math without a lot of hard work. |
Anonymous
THIS! If we have kids who struggle with reading, no one thinks to tell the kid "oh, don't worry, I wasn't good at reading either". We tell them to keep practicing. We ensure they have access to books all the time. We give them aps and websites and library cards to surround them in literacy. You do the same with math. Stress that it takes hard work to get good at it, and lots of practice, and then buy apps or books or whatever to allow the kid to practice. You don't need to teach your child reading - you just emphasize how important it is and surround them with reading. Do the same for math. Let the teacher teach. You point out how you need to make change at the grocery store, how you need to adjust the measurements in a recipe, how you figure out a batting average. |
Anonymous
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It's a whole new world now with youtube.
Whenever your kid gets a homework assignment in math that he needs help with, and you can't help or figure it out or figure out how to teach preteach it -- just look it up. Google "Youtube tutorial mean median mode" or "Youtube tutorial finding the least common denominator" for example, and have your kid watch a few of the tutorials. Or you watch a few, first, and relearn the concept. Then you will be in a better position to help your child. |
Anonymous
+ 1 Start with getting good text books (maybe even Teacher's edition), 2nd hand from Amazon.com... Trust me - you actually are more in tune to understand Math now than when you were a kid. 
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Anonymous
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don't borrow trouble.
you learned it once, you can learn it again. or hire a tutor. or maybe your kid won't have these struggles.... just don't project your worry. the truth is this: nothing taught in high school is really all that advanced or hard. calculus included. you have a phd, so you have the skills to handle this. |
Anonymous
Oh yes it is, too. I'm very good at some things but have zero aptitude for Math. None. I couldn't even read the questions on my SAT all those years ago. Went to Art School. Some of us just do not have the aptitude, and never will. |
Anonymous
| I just pay for tutors and math camp. Wouldn't you know that the younger one loves math. In two more years, she will have surpassed my comfort level. |
Anonymous
OP here. I don't have a Ph.D, just an MA., and I almost failed calculus in college. I was failing going into the final exam and crammed all night with my sister to claw my way up to a C-. At my college, you had to take calc, otherwise I wouldn't have gone near it with a ten foot pole! I won't even tell you what I got on my SAT/GRE math portion; let's just say it's a good thing I did well on the other sections. But, point taken. My kids actually seem quite good at math and probably have already surpassed DH's and my ability! Tutors and outside help it will be, if necessary! |
Anonymous
That's just it. It's not really an aptitude. It's a learned skill. It takes a lot of practice. |