12 yo cutting self

[Anonymous]

I noticed cuts along my daughters arm. She cut herself. Very superficial cuts. She swears she was just trying it because she heard about it from a friend. I'm heartbroken. Yes. I've taken her to therapist and immediately to the pediatrician.

[Anonymous]

So sorry to hear this. I don't have any advice to offer but it looks like you have taken immediate action. I hope everything works out. You are being a proactive parent. Your daughter is very lucky to have you as her mom. Hang in there.

[Anonymous]

As someone who cut, I think you're going overboard. If she was "trying it out" (which happens A LOT), she most likely won't be doing it again. I would keep an open eye, but dragging her to a therapist and the pediatrician? If this is a real thing for her she will start hiding it. She will lie up and down to you, the therapist, and the doctor. You need to be open minded, willing to talk if she wants to, and don't threaten her with therapists, hospitals, or other things that make her feel like she's out of control of herself.

[Anonymous]

I disagree with the pp. I also cut as an adolescent and I think you should get her to a therapist. I wouldn't have lied to my parents, but I needed more help than I was getting.

[Anonymous]

I didn't drag her to therapist. She wanted to go. I agreed not to tell therapist about cutting. She could tell if she wanted. I took her to ped to let her know it was serious and I was concerned and that adults are here to help her if needed. We actually have a really good relationship. I'm just sad she's in pain.and don't understand.

[Anonymous]

My DD cut. A therapist is good idea. Lying to the therapist is a bad idea.

I'm not sure what a pediatrician is going to do about; a therapist familiar with adolescent issues is good.

My DD did it for several years. The therapist has been a god send.

[Anonymous]

Not lying. Just letting dd tell rather than me.

[Anonymous]

Unfortunately, cutting is becoming very popular among middle school and teen girls. I heard from an ER nurse she sees these patients frequently.

Cutters get the same endorphin release that you get when you exercise. It is a much quicker release. It's a terrible coping strategy and a sign your daughter is struggling with something. There probably have been other signs you may have missed.

Take it seriously.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Not lying. Just letting dd tell rather than me.

At 12, you are still her parent. Her therapist needs to know even if the therapist doesn't mention it to your DD.

Still curious as to what the pediatrician did.

[Anonymous]

You should take her to a therapist AND tell the therapist about the cutting. No, you DD won't like it, but it's important to take these things seriously, even if they are a one-time experimental thing (many kids will say this re: drugs/sex/etc but it's not necessarily true). Good luck.

[Anonymous]

Pediatrician told me to tell her to think happy thoughts.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Pediatrician told me to tell her to think happy thoughts.

Is this a joke?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Pediatrician told me to tell her to think happy thoughts.

Is this a joke?

Nope.

[Anonymous]

Agree with other posters about seeing a therapist that has experience with self harm. Both of my daughters are cutters, they also suffer from depression and anxiety. Cutting has lead to other risky behaviors. I'm so sorry you have to deal with this. This book helped me understand what my daughters are going through: http://www.goodreads.com/book/show/486902.Inside_a_Cutter_s_Mind

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:As someone who cut, I think you're going overboard. If she was "trying it out" (which happens A LOT), she most likely won't be doing it again. I would keep an open eye, but dragging her to a therapist and the pediatrician? If this is a real thing for her she will start hiding it. She will lie up and down to you, the therapist, and the doctor. You need to be open minded, willing to talk if she wants to, and don't threaten her with therapists, hospitals, or other things that make her feel like she's out of control of herself.

The OP is trying to be a good parent. Besides, parent needs to document with pediatrician that those wounds are self inflicted so that no charges are brought against her (could happen if someone didn't understand the situation.)

OP is absolutely right to take steps, not ignore the problem. When I taught, I had several kids cut themselves (a group of friends). One was baker acted and the others were not because they just did it for attention/to support their friend.

How do you know she was just "trying it out"? Might be too embarrassed to admit it. Better safe than sorry.