Problems with executor of estate

[Anonymous]

I am receiving a small inheritance from the death of a close relative. The executor is a close family member as well. The estate consists of trusts (family and administrative), and bank accounts. It has been 18 months since my loved one passed away. I have received some distributions (brokerage accounts, bank accounts) but am getting so frustrated by lack of continuity from the executor. He just seems to be dragging his feet. The estate is being distributed in bits and pieces. He will say that he is arranging a distribution the next week, and then we hear nothing. When we send emails, he will say "sorry, I got sick, will respond soon". Then a few more weeks will go by and we will email him again. This time he will promise an update "soon".
It is beyond frustrating.
We had a meeting in the fall to address these issues and he promised to send updates every two weeks to keep us apprised of any updates/actions, but sadly hasn't followed through.

We have wondered if he is overwhelmed and offers have been made to help with administrative details. He made a comment to me "X keeps offering to help. She must really need the money. She's already gotten X amount so I don't understand what the problem is." This is a deterrent for me to offer help to him! The fact that he will twist it around in such a way has caused everyone to back off.

I don't think he is being dishonest or stealing money, but just can't get his act together. And yes, he tends to be a very touchy individual in general.


It is beyond frustrating. Do you have any suggestions? Since it is family, we have to tread very lightly.

[Anonymous]

When the next time he makes that comment you should respond "Maybe X is just tired of this thing dragging on forever and wants to put it to rest. I can relate to that, I have a lot of other things going on in my life and I wish this was squared away so I can cross it off my list."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:When the next time he makes that comment you should respond "Maybe X is just tired of this thing dragging on forever and wants to put it to rest. I can relate to that, I have a lot of other things going on in my life and I wish this was squared away so I can cross it off my list."

+1 on this. It isn't fair to anyone that the executor seems to needlessly be dragging this process out.

[Anonymous]

18 months isn't really that long of a time in dealing with an estate. But it sounds like the executor isn't 100 percent on the ball either. Maybe you all can ask for an update of what yet needs to be done, and what kind of time frame you are looking at?

[Anonymous]

Just finished administering aunt's estate in Florida. Took just under a year, start to finish, but the only assets were the home and a car. The home took a while because of back condo fees and a pending foreclosure (and because Bank of America is the worst bank in the world for every single purpose you can imagine), the car went to CarMax within a week. But I write because in Florida the executor has to explain to the court if the estate will be open more than a year.

Also, while I'm on the subject, Bank of America sucks.

[Anonymous]

I'd push the executor to commit to a specific date of next distribution. Then you have something to follow up with.

[Anonymous]

Bank of America is the worst bank in the world for every single purpose you can imagine.

This cannot be said enough.

OP, is there an attorney involved or just the executor?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Bank of America is the worst bank in the world for every single purpose you can imagine.

This cannot be said enough.

Saying it again. And again. And again. And again.

No idea why anyone would do business with them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Bank of America is the worst bank in the world for every single purpose you can imagine.

This cannot be said enough.

Saying it again. And again. And again. And again.

No idea why anyone would do business with them.

Not like you get much of a choice on who services your home loan.

[Anonymous]

Thanks everyone for the feedback! There was an attorney initially, but now he is just available as needed for consultation. It was the executor's choice to do this on his own.

It would be so much easier if we got periodic updates, but that is just not happening. It's good to know that 18 months is not considered an outlandish amount of time. But if the executor continues at this snail's pace, it's going to be much longer...

One specific distribution was promised a month ago. I did get an update recently, but it didn't even mention that distribution, but was about another aspect of the estate. I will continue to be direct in asking for updates, guess there's not much else I can do.

I didn't realize all the hate for Bank of America, but they screwed up here as well! They titled an account incorrectly meaning more taxes need to be paid.

[Anonymous]

I would consult the attorney at this point.

[Anonymous]

The Executor may be entitled to a cut of the estate depending on the laws in the state, etc.

[Anonymous]

He should have filed a Plan of Distribution with the court stating that all taxes, administrative expenses, and debts have been paid (BEFORE making any distribution to the heirs) and stating the schedule of distribution.

Ask to see that plan! The heirs NEED to see it in case they have any objections to it.

If he is giving you (the heirs) money before he has filed that plan, that is a big problem.

Also note that the law requires him to make distributions PROMPTLY unless one of the heirs has objected to the proposed distribution.

[Anonymous]

Former executor here ~ it' a big pain the the @ss job. Be very grateful that someone else is doing it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:He should have filed a Plan of Distribution with the court stating that all taxes, administrative expenses, and debts have been paid (BEFORE making any distribution to the heirs) and stating the schedule of distribution.

Ask to see that plan! The heirs NEED to see it in case they have any objections to it.

If he is giving you (the heirs) money before he has filed that plan, that is a big problem.

Also note that the law requires him to make distributions PROMPTLY unless one of the heirs has objected to the proposed distribution.

Thanks this is helpful, I will ask whether a Plan of Distribution was filed with the court. Is there anyway I could check that on my own ? ( in the interest of not making the executor defensive )