If you had one piece of advice to give to YOUR middle school girl...

[Anonymous]

If you had one piece of advice to give to a middle school girl... what would it be?

I'm helping a friend pull together a leadership conference for middle school girls for this fall, and want to see what the women on this board feel like they would have needed to hear at that age?

[Anonymous]

I wish someone had told me this when I was in 7th grade.

Don't concern yourself with where your group of friends sit in the cafeteria (there was a popular/unpopular side) and just sit with the people who will be there for you even after you ditch them for the more popular kids because a popular boy "likes" you. Your true friends will be there for you when those kids no longer want to be friends with you once that boy stops liking you.

[Anonymous]

My one piece of advice is "Be Yourself." It is so easy to follow the crowd in middle school. Most kids are afraid to stand out from their friends, even in good ways. I'd tell my daughter that being her own person may not make her cool in middle school but it will pay dividends in a few years when she has things about her that are unique and interesting. I'd tell her not to be afraid of being herself, for this is the only way to be truly happy.

[Anonymous]

Don't put all your friendship eggs in one basket. Friendships shift and shuffle in middle school. Best to have a few different groups of friends so if one friendship blows up, you are not winding up friendless.

[Anonymous]

The only way to be happy is to be honest about who you are and what you like. If you can embrace that, you'll not only be happy with yourself, you'll attract other genuine people without even trying.

[Anonymous]

I wish someone had told me that it is a nearly universal truth that middle school sucks. I'd probably have spent less time wondering what was wrong with me.

[Anonymous]

middle school and high school are but mere blips on the radar of a long and fruitful life. so many adventures await you; don't get caught up in the here of middle school emotional hardships. study hard, treat people well, emulate empathy and kindness. know that a whole world of possibilities and people await you in the future.

[Anonymous]

That middle school is tough for everyone. Try to spread kindness and compassion. You will not ever feel better about yourself by being unkind, catty, or downright mean to others, or by clinging tightly to your little clique. Demonstrating kindness, compassion, and being open to new friendships will increase your own happiness and will pay dividends later on.

[Anonymous]

(1) Everyone struggles with something in middle school, it's a difficult time for everyone, whether other students show it or not. You're not alone.

(2) Above all, be kind to yourself and your peers.

(3) Be bold, learn new skills, meet new people and don't be afraid to leave the security of known friends and activites to try something new.

[Anonymous]

Be nice to everyone, and stand up and say something when your group of friends (or any group of people) decides to pick on someone [because this will happen in middle school].

My best friend throughout middle school was a girl that our group of friends inexplicably decided to ostracize. We weren't that close, but I felt awful that everyone decided to shun her (stop sitting with her etc), so I would go sit with her by myself. We ended up being really close. We drifted after h/s but recently got back in touch. And my m/s experience was so much better having one really close friend instead of a group of girls so willing to drop someone for no reason whatsoever.

[Anonymous]

I was very SHY and AKWARD. I had low self esteem and thought I was not interesting. My family had moved a lot so I had trouble making friends in middle school bc I moved in the middle do the school year and it was tough.

I would tell myself not to worry, that I would come to find confidence and eventually meet people who would help me on that journey. From HS onwards my personality started to blossom. I finally made bonds. I didn't have a hundred friends but I made 3 strong friendships. I was around 14, and today at 34, two of those women are still my very best girls.

I wish I didn't worry about being judged. Spoke what I was thinking without worrying I was not cool. I wish others were nicer. I wish I realized looks don't matter at all and once you get older you find yourself and you realize you are beautiful. Acceptance if oneself is hard at that age, but as we all know somewhere along the path as we grow, and grow up we do find it and appreciate ourselves and wouldn't change our experiences for anything.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Don't put all your friendship eggs in one basket. Friendships shift and shuffle in middle school. Best to have a few different groups of friends so if one friendship blows up, you are not winding up friendless.

I think this is the only practical and real advice that a middle school girl would understand and be able to use that has been presented thus far.

The rest of the advice is adult advice that middle school girls are not going to be able to embrace. It's not practical. It's too abstract and theoretical. Even the "Be Yourself" because middle school girls and even into high school are trying to figure out who they are.

[Anonymous]

Stay involved in a sport/activity/hobby that you really like and try and do your best and excel.

[Anonymous]

The song "Video" by India Arie is everything I want my 7th grader to understand about herself.

[Anonymous]

Your best sexual partner is yourself and that's okay!