weird fears as you age/hit peri-menopause

[Anonymous]

so on another thread I noticed two people mentioned that they had become terrified of driving over the bay bridge. This sort of fear happened to me around 40, as well. I always thought it was just me, I live in the District, don't drive much, have bad eyesight, maybe I just suddenly developed a bad case of vertigo Now I'm realizing it's probably hormonal/aging!

Other things like this? I have to say, driving on the highway also freaks me out a bit. It seems like a dangerous system, allowing everyone to drive in vehicles that weigh thousands of pounds at 70 miles an hour and painting a few lines on the ground and saying--OK, guys, just follow these, you'll be fine.

Desire to make remarks out loud during boring speeches?

Anyone else or am I just turning into a crazy old bat?

[Anonymous]

I could have written your post! Since around age 45 (I'm 52 now) I drive along imagining every possible sudden move that the other drivers around me will make. I think everyone is going to suddenly change lanes and hit me. I especially don't like driving on one particular road in my town that has a speed limit of 50 and only a double yellow line separating opposing traffic. With everyone texting while driving these days...yikes. Bridges...since age 25-ish I have a fear of driving over any bridge. I think these things get worse as we age due to hormone changes which increase anxiety in general.

[Anonymous]

My anxiety level has definitely increased - but not out of nowhere. Meaning, what was alway there at manageable levels is exacerbated.

[Anonymous]

Hmmm, I am fearful that my skin will start looking much wrinklier. I have acne again -- and not thrilled about that. But, at 49, I just got my motorcycle license -- so I can't say that driving really scares me.

[Anonymous]

me too re the highway driving! Although in my case it's not so much general anxiety as feeling like other people are total idiots, all talking on their cell phones and not paying attention, they shouldn't be allowed to operate machines that can kill other people.

[Anonymous]

I am having trouble driving over bridges now. Never liked it, but now I freak out while doing it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:me too re the highway driving! Although in my case it's not so much general anxiety as feeling like other people are total idiots, all talking on their cell phones and not paying attention, they shouldn't be allowed to operate machines that can kill other people.

+1 Actually I've felt this way for a while now - ever since I became a mom. I've seen just too many instances of inattentive people running red lights, swerving in and out of their own lane while texting. Speeders, tail gaiters, aggressive drivers are also a worry.

I DREAD teaching my kids how to drive in this area.

[Anonymous]

I am much more anxious about driving. Scared every time I get behind the wheel. Was in Philly this weekend and saw two terrible accidents, so bad there must have been serious injuries. But in Philly people drive so fast it's mind boggling. Much faster than they do here, on much more dangerous roads.

I wish I lived in NYC and walked everywhere. But when I lived there, I was always afraid of getting hit by a cab running a red light (saw this constantly, running a light, not hitting pedestrians).

I love to travel but am getting agoraphobic, a bit. My dream is just sitting at home, in my safe little bedroom, like now, with my computer, a cup of tea. Alone.

Never used to be like this. God, I hate menopause.

[Anonymous]

I absolutely dread merging onto the beltway. I am starting to worry that I'll lose my nerve in the middle of trying to do it, even though I know that would be a complete disaster!

[Anonymous]

PPs, were you always fearful of driving, a bit? Or were you already an anxious person prior to menopause?
I haven't hit menopause and I already hate driving - hate to think it's only going to get worse!

[Anonymous]

I went through surgical menopause at 47, 3 years ago. I am less fearful and anxious now than before! I had cancer, so I had to come to terms with my mortality, I guess.

[Anonymous]

Definitely more anxious now than when younger. I used to love long trips in the car alone. In my 20s, I used to spend occasional weekends in CT with a relative. I had to drive over the Throgs Neck Bridge to get there (huge bridge in NYC). That was my favorite part of the whole trip. The view, being up high was a thrill. If I got stuck in bumper to bumper traffic on the bridge it was even better because then I got to sit there and enjoy the view longer, radio blasting, etc. Then....something happened, lol. Can't do bridges anymore. The higher they are, the worse it is. I even have nightmares now sometimes about having to drive over insanely high bridges.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Definitely more anxious now than when younger. I used to love long trips in the car alone. In my 20s, I used to spend occasional weekends in CT with a relative. I had to drive over the Throgs Neck Bridge to get there (huge bridge in NYC). That was my favorite part of the whole trip. The view, being up high was a thrill. If I got stuck in bumper to bumper traffic on the bridge it was even better because then I got to sit there and enjoy the view longer, radio blasting, etc. Then....something happened, lol. Can't do bridges anymore. The higher they are, the worse it is. I even have nightmares now sometimes about having to drive over insanely high bridges.

age 48 here and can't do bridges anymore. The Chesapeake Bay Bridge is the worst. I can't even look over when DH drives on it. I also hate the bridges on 95 heading toward Philadelphia/ NJ turnpike. I feel so pathetic.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:PPs, were you always fearful of driving, a bit? Or were you already an anxious person prior to menopause?
I haven't hit menopause and I already hate driving - hate to think it's only going to get worse!

I absolutely loved driving when I was younger - did 10 hour trips by myself, very speedy, no fear at all. I'm post menopausal now, but about 5 years ago started having anxiety driving and bridges.

[Anonymous]

OP here--wow, thanks! This actually makes me feel better, I thought I was crazy. I wonder if, like PMS, now that I realize it might be hormonal, I can control the fear a little more…thanks for being honest everyone.