Typical for a preteen girl to be a know-it-all?

[Anonymous]

My daughter is driving us nuts with this. I don't know if she does this with her friends, but I can't take it! Is this developmentally normal and expected for girls at this age??

[Anonymous]

Yes, it's normal...good luck--it's an annoying phase and I know I was that way for a number of years.

[Anonymous]

My DIL is like that. I hate her.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My DIL is like that. I hate her.

But she's probably not 12. The question refers to a preteen. And aren't you a peach?

[Anonymous]

Is it for the sake of precision, like getting history dates correct? I would not mind that too much, except to remind her that it is rude to correct other people repeatedly. People with Asperger's often do this, and I live with some of them

Or is it more of a one-upmanship contest? In that case, not cool. Perhaps some friends in her circle are doing it and she feels she has to keep up. I would explain that it makes everyone around her feel inferior, uncomfortable and resentful of her, and to stop unless she's ready for consequences.

[Anonymous]

Example, OP?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
Is it for the sake of precision, like getting history dates correct? I would not mind that too much, except to remind her that it is rude to correct other people repeatedly. People with Asperger's often do this, and I live with some of them

Or is it more of a one-upmanship contest? In that case, not cool. Perhaps some friends in her circle are doing it and she feels she has to keep up. I would explain that it makes everyone around her feel inferior, uncomfortable and resentful of her, and to stop unless she's ready for consequences.

I was going to ask OP if DD has autism. Or is she a bully? Or is she being bullied?

[Anonymous]

Has she been told she's so smart a bit too often?

[Anonymous]

Yeah, duh!

[Anonymous]

It is apparently, though some kids seem grab on to it with both hands. I found this interview on the Diane Rehm show useful. I am thinking of getting the book

Daniel Siegel: "Brainstorm: The Power And Purpose Of The Teenage Brain"


http://thedianerehmshow.org/shows/2014-01-06/daniel-siegel-brainstorm-power-and-purpose-teenage-brain

[Anonymous]

I'm OP: no "disorders" of any kind. She's healthy and does well in school. Just wondering if this is a phase or is she on her way to being impossible.

[Anonymous]

Prepare for this to continue until she's about 25, living on her own, drowning in student loans, and eating ramen. Then she'll realize she knows nothing.

[Anonymous]

Hi OP,

My DD is 11 and suddenly rolling her eyes every time I open my mouth. And talking to me in a way that implies I'm an idiot. And if I mention something, e.g. "The rolls are in the oven," I get the "I KNOW, mom!"

It's been going on for about a month. I want to throttle her. She knows better to do it in public because I WILL correct her in front of her friends and make her apologize which would embarrass her no end. But in private, it's a constant battle because I won't ignore this bad behavior.

For what it's worth, it appears to be only with me and her sibling (and probably her dad, but he was traveling so I haven't had a chance to see yet).

And also, teachers, friends' parents, coaches, etc. all say she's very polite and respectful and easy to have around. (I know, Jekyll and Hyde)

I find it very difficult. Since DH was traveling, I felt like every minute with her was me being beaten down. At one point she said something snarky and I whipped around and smacked her (not hard) and started yelling. Ugh, that's not what I want to be teaching my kid.

I am not big on sleepovers but she was asked to go on one by a classmate yesterday and I said yes for the wrong reason: Because I just couldn't take being around her anymore!

So just to give you an idea: Friday DD tells me that classmate wanted her over for a sleepover and classmate's mom would call me, and she wanted to go.

Saturday the phone rings and it's the mom. I can't get ahold of DD because wtf she's taking a shower in my bathroom, without my permission, and got two doors to that bathroom locked and I can't get her to hear me. Well she had told me she wanted to go anyways, so I said yes.

I tell DD and I get the "I don't want to go. You didn't ask me. Thanks for selling me out, mom!" Then a moping session followed by a crying session…

Of course now she's gone and I see she messed up my bathroom floor (toppled bottles that leaked out) so I'm waiting for her to come home so I can make her clean it.

Not looking forward to the teenage years!

[Anonymous]

Is the sky blue?

Seriously, stop and think hard about how you were at this age.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Is the sky blue?

Seriously, stop and think hard about how you were at this age.

See that's the thing: I was okay at this age. I didn't get attitudinal until about 16.