If your child says "whatever"

[Anonymous]

My 6 1/2 yr old has started saying, "whatever" when I ask him to do something. He'll do what I asked but says "whatever" as he's doing it.

It's bugging me- I find it rude and disrespectful but I know it's normal pushback behavior. He's a good kid an a rule follower.

Do I ignore it? Warn him that if he does it again he looses a privilege?

[Anonymous]

I would say: "Excuse me! What did you just say?" That is what I do with my 3y old and it is always replied with "nothing." She doesn't need to like whatever I asked her to do, but I don't allow her to be disrespectful.

[Anonymous]

If you think it is rude why would you ignore it?

I would tell my dc that it is rude to answer a request with that. He needs to know - if he does it at school for example when the teacher asks him to complete a task, that would be quite rude. Explain that you do not want to hear him responding in that way anymore. If he continues to do it then give a consequence for not following your directions.

[Anonymous]

Six is pretty young for that kind of adolescent attitude. Better to nip it now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Six is pretty young for that kind of adolescent attitude. Better to nip it now.

+1

[Anonymous]

He's probably just repeating language/behavior from school and he needs you to help him understand that it doesn't fit with what you expect and who he is. It's not too young to teach values and it's a perfect age for him to get tangible examples of how what we say expresses or contradicts a particular value. So, if you have a value of loving and respecting each other in your home, then saying "whatever" doesn't fit with that value and is not allowed. Give him replacement words that are acceptable for when he wants to express displeasure.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would say: "Excuse me! What did you just say?" That is what I do with my 3y old and it is always replied with "nothing." She doesn't need to like whatever I asked her to do, but I don't allow her to be disrespectful.

+ 1

I would throw in a warning as well. I would also say "If you reply like this to me one more time, you will be punished. You will be (insert the punishment). Consider yourself warned. This is the only warning you will get"

[Anonymous]

I'd point out the stupidity of saying "whatever" which is dismissive of what someone's just said when acting upon what they just told you to do.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'd point out the stupidity of saying "whatever" which is dismissive of what someone's just said when acting upon what they just told you to do.

Wouldn't this just escalate the attitude - pointing out the stupidity of what DS just said? Seems like DS needs an appropriate alternative for voicing his opposition to the task. He's still doing what mom asked, he just wants to make it known he didn't want to do it. He needs to learn how to say that without attitude.

[Anonymous]

I usually say, "Let's try this again. This time, you will answer me respectfully." Then, I tell him to do ________, he will say, "Okay" while looking at me. And then I will say, "Much better this time." And then move on. I did have to explain to my son why "whatever" is rude since so many people talk that way these days.

[Anonymous]

My 6-y-o went through a phase of "whatever" about a year ago. We laughed about it & mostly ignored it. (I think I bought her a t-shirt that said WHATEVERWHATEVERWHATEVER.) She doesn't do it anymore, I'm not sure how long it took for her to give it up.