Pre-K Programs -- Traditional Independent School or "Special" School?

[Anonymous]

Hello,
I am so confused by the school search so I'm turning to you for advice. My daughter attends a traditional preschool right now, but has to move on next year. She has no formal diagnosis but has some OT issues -- fine and gross motor, and social delays -- she doesn't often initiate play with other children -- she may also have some auditory processing. That being said she does really well in the classroom. She is reading at age 4, she participates in class -- she's verbal but does some parroting. They've suggested I look at small private schools where she will get the attention she needs, but I'm wonder whether I should include schools like Maddux in my search. Are there children at Maddux who have autism or is it more mild delays? And which traditional independent schools do well with special needs?

[Anonymous]

I don't know about specific schools but you may need to have an actual formal evaluation and diagnosis to gain access to any special programs in public or private schools. If she does have sensory issues and is seeking treatment w/ an OT, she should have documentation of it. Otherwise the schools are going to say "What is her diagnosis?" W/o one, they won't know where to start.

[Anonymous]

I would caution you about being so open about your child's possible special needs when applying to traditional independent schools. These schools do their best to avoid children they think might have learning issues that the school is either not equipped to handle or would prefer not to handle. The issues your child exhibits sound quite mild and she does sound like an excellent candidate for a warm, nurturing school with small class sizes -- perhaps one of the progressive independent schools who have a "whole child" approach. Please understand that once such children are admitted and issues become known, the schools will work very hard to help your child learn and thrive. Best wishes.

[Anonymous]

Lowell could be a great place for your child.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would caution you about being so open about your child's possible special needs when applying to traditional independent schools. These schools do their best to avoid children they think might have learning issues that the school is either not equipped to handle or would prefer not to handle. The issues your child exhibits sound quite mild and she does sound like an excellent candidate for a warm, nurturing school with small class sizes -- perhaps one of the progressive independent schools who have a "whole child" approach. Please understand that once such children are admitted and issues become known, the schools will work very hard to help your child learn and thrive. Best wishes.

Just to argue the other side... I don't know your child, so don't know the severity of her issues, but I think it is sometimes a set-up for a parent to be less than open about their child's needs when applying. Sure, the school is likely to work with your child once she is there, but if she really has needs they cannot handle, she may feel like a failure/miss out on crucial opportunities for development. Better to be honest and see what the school says; they know what they can/can't handle.

It might be different if these were issues she had entirely overcome, but you describe them as ongoing.

[Anonymous]

If you were to not tell the schools about your child's issues, what is going to happen once they see them for themselves? That is why they have testing and playdates to try to weed out the kids who have problems (b/c most of these schools don't employ lots of people to handle them). If you daughter receives OT, she is obviously in need of special help. I agree w/ the PP about being honest. Do you want your daughter to go to a school that can't help her? They will eventually ask her to leave.

[Anonymous]

9:57 again. I guess I was not suggesting that the family out-right lie, but the child's teacher recommendations, WPPSIII testing results, and the school's admission play date should provide the school with a full description of the child's situation. I am just saying that if the child seems to be functioning well in preschool now and has what currently appear to be mild issues, there's no need to go in to a school and say "Can you accomodate my SPECIAL NEEDS child?" Fine and gross motor skills and social skills delays can be largely overcome and it sounds like the child is on that path already.

What I was suggesting was less emphasis on the child's issues. Instead focus on whether a school has a warm, nurturing atmosphere, has small class sizes, has on-site speech therapist (for extra fee, unfortunately!), and so forth.

[Anonymous]

OP here. You've all hit on the crux of the issue. Its difficult for children and parents with mild issues. You want to be upfront and make sure the school is a good fit but you don't want to scare of schools with the "special needs" label -- which seems to span a broad section of children.

[Anonymous]

Try to get a full evaluation, to rule about possible PDD/autism spectrum. Some of what you describe indicate possible mildly 'on the spectrum'. Do this with a pediatric psychologist and/or developmental pediatrician. Don't know if she is in private OT & SLT, but have a thorough eval done. After you gather all this info, then you can begin to consider school options. In the mean time, do visit some of the smaller, more accommodates independent schools (as one person suggested, Lowell. Also, Green Acres, Burgundy Farm) Don't remember/know where you live, but I named a school in each metro area.