WWYD, ex can't take the kids....
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Anonymous
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If your MIL agreed to take the kids because your ex can't take his custodial time, and you know she LOVES your kids, and would never be mean to them, but she hates babysitting, and dislikes you, would you send them over there anyway? I have plans that I will have to cancel because he can't take his time, unless I allow the babysitting arrangement. MIL doesn't like me, but loves the kids. I would have to drop them off with her. WWYD? |
Anonymous
| I don't understand how she loves the kids but hates babysitting them. ? |
Anonymous
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Why isn't this up to your ex to solve.. or is this his solution?
She loves the kids and you know they are well treated. Drop them off. (Why does it matter that she dislikes you? You're just dropping them off.) |
Anonymous
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If she loves the kids and is safe with them, then yes send them over. Your ex should actually the one arranging this. He could arrange his mom to take them seeing as he can't this time. It is his time. Why are you allowing / not allowing time with grandparents unless there is a restriction about where kids need to be during time the ex?
Same as if you decided to have your parents babysit some day while the kids are with you - you don't need your ex to okay or arrange that. You would just do it. He should too. |
Anonymous
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How old are the kids? Has she babysat for them before with any regularity? Will you be able to enjoy your planned events, or will you worry so much about how things are going with MIL that you might as well not be there? Do the kids love her?
Just some thoughts to consider. It sounds like a no, and that you should develop some babysitting leads for instances like this. |
Anonymous
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This is his solution.
I could probably get a babysitter but it's his responsibility. But I would have to pay her because he provided a reasonable care alternative. I do think it's possible to love the kids but not want to babysit them. The relative in this case is not actually MIL. I am changing identities. Yes they will be safe and no I will not be worried. I hate that he is basically making me impose on his relative when I know they don't like babysitting. They don't like me either, and now I have to take my kids over there. They will act like they are doing *me* a favor when it's his time. Argh. |
Anonymous
| Let them go to the MILs. Be gracious and open to this arrangement, which offers care for the kids and lets you keep your plans. Perhaps the relative will surprise you. |
Anonymous
| Its about the kids, not you. Your choice. |
Anonymous
| Why not just make ex take them over to the relative himself? That way, you're not put in the position of "imposing." |
Anonymous
Hire a babysitter. Less drama is good for everyone.
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Anonymous
| Get a babysitter. If you have to pay the relative then I would rather pay a sitter and not deal with the drama. |
Anonymous
| Find other arrangements. |
Anonymous
+1 |
Anonymous
| OOOooooo! This is a tough one. If the kids will have a good time, I say let them go because it really is about them and about your ex's responsibility, not about you. It will at last allow your ex's side of the family to maintain a relationship with them. I understand why you hate thte idea of those people thinking they're doing you a favor but, believe me, they know it's your ex they're doing they favor for. They wouldn't do it for you but they will do it for him. Fuck 'em. Don't waste your money on babysitting. Accept the arrangment your ex has made with civility and restraint. |
Anonymous
| Get a babysitter. Don't feed the drama. |