Teacher thinks DS has ODD

[Anonymous]

Preschool teacher pulled me aside today at school and casually mentions she thinks 3 year old DS might have ODD. I didn't even know what that was. Now that I'm reading about it, I can see some similarities. DS doesn't have other special needs that we know of, but has always been extra sensitive and more negative than his peers. Gets explosively angry and is often disagreeable. Hates any sort of directions or rules. I've seen other parents offer choices or make gentle suggestions when in conflict with their kid. That doesn't work with mine at all, he gets angrier. Will yell, "no" and rude comments at us "I won't. Stop!" Will deliberately annoy his friends, grab their chair and shake it, grab their toy and run, those kinds of things. And he finds their reactions amusing. I thought these behaviors were typical for age 3, almost 4, but maybe no? What worries me most is that most people find him annoying, especially other kids his age. He hasn't been able to connect with peers at school. How do you get ODD diagnosed? Is there anything to do about it?

[Anonymous]

Please read "The Way of Boys" before you get caught up in diagnosing ODD at such an early age. As the author puts it you are probably experiencing the "storm before the calm" where negative behaviors flourish right before developmental breakthroughs.

[Anonymous]

Visit a developmental pediatrician. IMO, your preschool teacher was out of line by offering a diagnosis. Still, there are enough red flags to see someone and to get help.

[Anonymous]

^^^ This!

[Anonymous]

take Dr.Shapiro's parenting class, or see if you can get a consult. "ODD" could be ADHD poorly managed, could be not finding the right way to connect with your kid. Labeling a 3 year old as having a conduct disorder is not that helpful, and its worrisome that preschool is doing this. Both you and preschool need better strategies for addressing and understanding the behavior at the very least.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Visit a developmental pediatrician. IMO, your preschool teacher was out of line by offering a diagnosis. Still, there are enough red flags to see someone and to get help.

Is the preschool teacher a doctor? I totally agree that the teacher is out of line.

My husband and I still joke that while we were meeting with a preschool for my DS to discuss our son as we were diagnosing developmentally delays, the preschool had the print out for autism, ADHD copied and sitting on the table. We are in second grade now and doing fine. No autism diagnose, no ADHD - just speech, gross & fine motor skills delays. Although preschool teachers can tell when a kid is different from the norm, they are not doctors.

[Anonymous]

Totally out of line for a teacher to suggest any sort diagnosis, but I would take her comments seriously. Sounds like she is suggesting some sort of evaluation. Teachers are often good at spotting differences and challenges... preschool is often where problems arise.

[Anonymous]

Honestly, he just sounds like a brat. Do you have a routine at home? Is the preschool routine and structured? Are you disciplining him for his behavior with peers? What about at school?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Honestly, he just sounds like a brat. Do you have a routine at home? Is the preschool routine and structured? Are you disciplining him for his behavior with peers? What about at school?

Yikes, did you wander over from general parenting? You don't know what you are talking about.

[Anonymous]

Altho the PP was somewhat rude, it is worth asking how you discipline your DS. If giving him choices, what do you do? What is your response when he yells, is rude or inappropriate? Have you taken any discipline classes such as Positive Discipline? Have your read up on discipline? If your DS is only 3 and is annoying his peers (and adults) to the point they don't want to be around him, that's problematic. Before getting evaluations, you typically look at your interactions with him and discipline techniques.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Visit a developmental pediatrician. IMO, your preschool teacher was out of line by offering a diagnosis. Still, there are enough red flags to see someone and to get help.

Red flags for your kid, but I would have a serious talk with the director regarding the teacher. We were at a preschool where the teacher was handing out diagnoses left and right everything from autism to speech delay. ODD is a very specific diagnosis, but this behavior could be the result of several things.

If you see a developmental pediatrician, do not repeat this. Describe the behaviors that you see and let them make an assessment.

BTW, this book was written based on behavior research with kids with ODD, but the methods can be used on all kinds of kids: http://www.amazon.com/Kazdin-Method-Parenting-Defiant-Child/dp/0547085826/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1382481825&sr=1-1&keywords=kazdin+method+for+parenting+the+defiant+child

[Anonymous]

Preschool teachers are not properly educated enough to diagnosis disorders (unless the teacher is also a doctor or similar). I agree on going to a developmental ped and also taking Dr. Shapiro's class.

[Anonymous]

Every 3 year old sounds like they have ODD, also every teenager.

[Anonymous]

A preschool teacher offers a diagnosis for a child? A trip to the administrator's office -- immediately -- to report this nonsense. Because think of what she's saying and doing about the children who DO have a diagnosis.

[Anonymous]

I'm a child psychologist. Teacher has no credentials/education to offer a dx for your child. Behaviors you mention could relate to many different things and I would never be so quick to label a child with a conduct disorder. Visit your doctor and or a therapist. And talk to the teacher/director. I hate when people label children.