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Ds is 9 yrs old, has severe ADHD combined and sensory processing disorder. He also has some speech issues.
We were discussing sadness with my other child and realized that we could not think of a single instance of my 9 yr old ever getting sad. He does get angry sometimes, occasionally upset for a fleeting moment but then he just goes right back to being him. Even as a baby he hardly ever cried. When he got vaxes, he would get a look of shock on his face and then close his eyes and sleep. He has never been attached to anything enough to be sad over losing it. Ditto for events he would want to go to. Loves to play with his friends, but doesn't really care if he hasn't seen them in a long time. It's usually other parents that contact us for play dates. He's a pretty happy kid and very social, which is GREAT! But I still feel like it's odd he doesn't get sad. Anyone else have a child like this? Am I missing any red flags here or am I reading too much into this and should let it go? |
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Who diagnosed him with ADHD and sensory issues? How long ago was it and do you think they missed something in the diagnosis?
He may not cry but he may feel sad inwardly and just not be able to express it. |
| He may feel sad on the inside and on the outside, it looks like anger. |
ADHD via neuropsych report when he was almost 8 yrs old. SPD-by OT eval age 6 years old. He does have problems with expressive language, I've just never seen him even upset enough to be holding onto any sadness. He does get upset or mad but it really only lasts a few minutes and then he's back to his normal carefree self. I do think that it's a great trait that he can let things just roll off his back so easily, I just want to make sure that's all it is. |
I get this because this is what happens with me. But I will be obviously upset for a while, it's not easy for me to forget quickly. He goes right back to normal. |
If you really want to pursue it, you might take him to a therapist for a few sessions. It might be just the way he is though. It sounds like he expresses a breadth of emotions. I would be more worried if he were showing signs of internalizing emotions--like teeth grinding, upset stomachs, etc. |
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One of my young adult DC's is like this.
Content, optimistic, almost all the time. Very resilient. It has been a gift. |
OP here, thank you. This is what I'm really hoping it is. He's not optimistic, but is happy and willing to try new things. |
| Don't wan to be a downer, but my insecure attachment adult never cried, ever and has severe map-adaptment issues. Can't hold a job, girlfriend, etc. Lack of sadness is not an issue per we, but lack of attachment is an issue. |
| My DD has moderate ADHD and is also pretty quick to get over sad and angry moments. She remembers being yelled at though and brings it up so I know she thinks about it and she does have friend attachments I think but is not focused hard on one of them. But she is also only 7. I think difficulty with expression is part of it and talking about feelings helps get more out of what she's thinking. |
| With ADD, it's hard to form emotional attachments. |
| I was that kid. ADHD and never sad. On the outside. Inside I would be tearing up. When my Dad, I didn't make a sound at the funeral. To this day some of the relatives keep complaining, "and she didn't even shed a tear." What they didnt know was that I spent a zillion $ for therapy years later. |