comfortable living alone?

[Anonymous]

I suck at being single ..... I suck even more at it since I have a baby to be responsible for

Im paranoid something is going to happen

someone will break it or I dunno I fall and break a leg and no one will find us for WEEKS

how do you live alone and feel safe?

[Anonymous]

I dunno. It's 12:12 a.m., and I'm not sleeping either.

[Anonymous]

thing is Im not productive either though when Im up at night...

and my son at 1 still is waking up atleast once an hour so by the itme i get my self settled

bam hes awake

[Anonymous]

I know how you feel. I smacked my head against the bedroom doorframe in the middle of the night after putting the baby down a few months ago, and thought "Please don't let me die in the night with these two kids here...." I put the phone by my bed.

Do you have pets? I got a dog, already had one cat and now have two. It helps me feel protected. (But it is extra work to do all the dog walking, which I dutifully did for the first year. I just couldn't take it anymore. I secured our backyard fence so the dog can't get out, and now he spends time out there instead of being walked. It's not ideal for him but our house is full of love and fun so he gets compensated in other ways.)

All that said, I do feel like I am in my cozy home, just lonely.

[Anonymous]

actually, yes, I am comfortable living alone. It helps to have an alarm system (perhaps this lends only a false sense of security) and terrific neighbors. If you don't have friends down the street or down the hall or around the corner, try to make some. I know all of my neighbors, they all fawn over my child, and we all look out for one another.

[Anonymous]

I too am comfortable living alone with my son. That said, he is now 4. When he was younger (particulary an infant), I was terrified that something was going to happen to me and no one would know/find him. So, I set up a system of checks - if I didn't show up at work by a certain time, my co-workers knew to check on me. My mother calls me everyday to check in. I have neighbors I can count on to check on us if they suspect something is wrong. Now that my son is 4, I have taught him how to call 911, to go to the neighbors if there is a problem, etc.

[Anonymous]

well Im glad to know that I may reach the point of comfort ...

I think part of it stems from never having lived alone

[zumbamama]

Even though I'm a cat person, if I had to live alone, I'd get a dog. I would also learn some basic self defense (a good idea no matter your living situation).

[Anonymous]

If you are at all a pet person, do consider getting a dog. Even a small dog will deter people from breaking into your house. I feel much more comfortable at home alone with a dog because I know the dog will bark if anything were to happen (she will then hide, but the burglers don't know that). So if I start to freak out that I heard a noise, I can just tell myself "well, the dog is fine, so everything must be fine."

As far as the "hitting your head and dieing" thing. Do you have anyone that could call or you could call on a regular basis, so that they will know if you suddenly aren't responding? It may make you feel better just knowing that someone will notice if you drop off the face of the earth.

If you are really freaked out, you could get some panic buttons - like older people have. I don't know how they work, but they summon help. You'd have to be sure to keep them out of reach of the children.

[Anonymous]

well unfortuantly even though i like animals it comes down to money a dog costs to own and I cant afford one by the time you add it up

buy the dog, pay extra rent, feed the dog, vet bills, other dog needs, etc

[Anonymous]

Yeah the idea of a dog sounds nice, but realistically can't handle one right now.

Gosh, I thought I was alone on this one. I actually was thinking about this the other. When we go up to visit family this Thanksgiving I'm gonna ask my family members to help me with a check in system. Once I get the courage to tell the folks at my job about my separation, then I'll establish one here too. As for neighbors, I don't think it's gonna happen. Most that I've run into seem snobbish and in their own world.