facial hair at work - what is acceptable?

[Anonymous]

I recently started to work in a semi-conservative place and dress quite well...tailored shirts, pants, tasteful shoes, etc. I stay in shape and I am hygienic.

However I have extremely sensitive facial skin so I only shave once a week or once in two weeks.

I've had a couple people at work (not my direct boss) and HR make a comment regarding my facial hair. At first I didn't say anything but when HR told me they've received a couple of comments, I explained that I have sensitive skin and can't shave often.

I'm of indian descent (not sikh) so there is no religious reason why i don't shave, its just not comfortable to do it more than once a week.

Do i need to get a note from a dermatologist to have them get off my back? I mean, this place isn't a tony white shoe place like cravath or brown brothers harriman. Nor is it the New York Yankees where they have a facial hair policy in print.

I have seen no HR literature that has spelled out facial hair guidelines/requirements.

How much of an issue is this at places where you guys work at and how would you suggest I resolve this issue? To be honest, It kind of irritates me because if they think it is an 'image issue' there are a lot of people who could stand to lose quite a bit of weight or dress with better fitting clothing.

[Anonymous]

Just wondering - are you a man or woman?

[Anonymous]

Could you grow and keep a neatly trimmed beard? No one should harrass you about that, but I'm guessing the first few days after a shave look more like 'rough night last night?' I completely agree with you that it is irritating, but I doubt you want to take on your new employer, and anyway why fight city hall...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Could you grow and keep a neatly trimmed beard? No one should harrass you about that, but I'm guessing the first few days after a shave look more like 'rough night last night?' I completely agree with you that it is irritating, but I doubt you want to take on your new employer, and anyway why fight city hall...

+1. I think a neatly-trimmed beard would look better than either a five-o-clock shadow thing or a very irritated clean-shaven face.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Could you grow and keep a neatly trimmed beard? No one should harrass you about that, but I'm guessing the first few days after a shave look more like 'rough night last night?' I completely agree with you that it is irritating, but I doubt you want to take on your new employer, and anyway why fight city hall...

I would if i could....the longest i've ever grown out is 3 weeks and it gets very itchy so i clean shave every monday morning.

I mean I could I guess trim it short enough for that fashion 'perma stubble' style.

Day's 3-4 are when it looks 'rough last night'. by day 5 its decently thick and even all over.

my facial hair comes in evenly and thick so it isn't a uneven/patchy pattern like some of my white colleagues.

I'm from originally out west where 'anything goes' so this was a bit of a shock. I mean i've heard stories at places like wall street banks that make you shave in the bathroom if you come in with stubble/facial hair that isn't at the bernanke-beard stage.

I just found it utterly crazy. I mean, not wearing a suit and shirt 2-3 sizes too big is something you can control. Facial sensitivity isn't.

[Anonymous]

Have you considered electrolysis or laser hair removal?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Have you considered electrolysis or laser hair removal?

no.

that would be like me suggesting to a slightly overweight person to get a liposuction or lap band put in.

[Anonymous]

I would think that if you get a doctor's note and present it as a disability they would get off your back.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How much of an issue is this at places where you guys work at and how would you suggest I resolve this issue? To be honest, It kind of irritates me because if they think it is an 'image issue' there are a lot of people who could stand to lose quite a bit of weight or dress with better fitting clothing.

Private firms can have any rules in place they want, even if it isn't spelled out in a policy somewhere. The real question is, do you want to work in a place that obsesses over your facial hair? If you present it as a disability, they may feel like they have to deal with it, but they probably won't like it. Why do you want to deal with all that kind of tension?

[Anonymous]

Can you use an electric razor? I know they aren't great, but it'll probably trim your hair close enough to lessen the comments but not irritate your skin so much.

Or, really, beards are awesome.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How much of an issue is this at places where you guys work at and how would you suggest I resolve this issue? To be honest, It kind of irritates me because if they think it is an 'image issue' there are a lot of people who could stand to lose quite a bit of weight or dress with better fitting clothing.

Private firms can have any rules in place they want, even if it isn't spelled out in a policy somewhere. The real question is, do you want to work in a place that obsesses over your facial hair? If you present it as a disability, they may feel like they have to deal with it, but they probably won't like it. Why do you want to deal with all that kind of tension?

No, Ideally I'd work at place like where my sister works where you can pretty much show up looking like you are a hobo and no one gives a shit.

i spoke to my direct manager and he said not to worry about it but I am going to get a note from a dermatologist friend of mine and keep it just incase.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How much of an issue is this at places where you guys work at and how would you suggest I resolve this issue? To be honest, It kind of irritates me because if they think it is an 'image issue' there are a lot of people who could stand to lose quite a bit of weight or dress with better fitting clothing.

Private firms can have any rules in place they want, even if it isn't spelled out in a policy somewhere. The real question is, do you want to work in a place that obsesses over your facial hair? If you present it as a disability, they may feel like they have to deal with it, but they probably won't like it. Why do you want to deal with all that kind of tension?

No, Ideally I'd work at place like where my sister works where you can pretty much show up looking like you are a hobo and no one gives a shit.

i spoke to my direct manager and he said not to worry about it but I am going to get a note from a dermatologist friend of mine and keep it just incase.

I know someplace like that. The funny thing is that when people dress like they have a job that pays, co-workers wonder why.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How much of an issue is this at places where you guys work at and how would you suggest I resolve this issue? To be honest, It kind of irritates me because if they think it is an 'image issue' there are a lot of people who could stand to lose quite a bit of weight or dress with better fitting clothing.

Private firms can have any rules in place they want, even if it isn't spelled out in a policy somewhere. The real question is, do you want to work in a place that obsesses over your facial hair? If you present it as a disability, they may feel like they have to deal with it, but they probably won't like it. Why do you want to deal with all that kind of tension?

No, Ideally I'd work at place like where my sister works where you can pretty much show up looking like you are a hobo and no one gives a shit.

i spoke to my direct manager and he said not to worry about it but I am going to get a note from a dermatologist friend of mine and keep it just incase.

I know someplace like that. The funny thing is that when people dress like they have a job that pays, co-workers wonder why.

Heh, the comment at my sister's place when someone wears slacks and a sport coat or a suit to work is if they have an afternoon interview somewhere else.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would think that if you get a doctor's note and present it as a disability they would get off your back.

Omg do NOT be that guy. Please. It may get you what you want in the short term but it will not serve you well to have made a stink about this early in your tenure.

And stop whining about how other people dress and look. It's not relevant and it makes you sound petty and small.