Babysitter doesn't like my child

[Anonymous]

DD goes to a babysitter three days a week before afternoon preschool so I can work outside the home. We've only been in this arrangement since September but my mom-spidey-sense is tingling. The babysitter doesn't seem to take any joy in my daughter whatsoever -- no smiles, cute stories from the day, or happy stories from my daughter (age 4) about what they did during the day. The babysitter has a rather flat affect -- not much interaction, sort of weird! I did check her out beforehand with references and communicated at length via email but that person and this person don't really seem to be the same one. DD doesn't want to go, but has no specific complaints, which until now, I have just chalked up to the normal protests about leaving mommy. I asked DD's teacher for any feedback and she just said that the babysitter comes in and out, doesn't interact, and does seem flat.

I'm looking for other babysitters because although I have no hint that anything really bad is going on, it makes me so sad that DD would be with someone who is joyless. Not everyone has to like her, but I certainly don't want that person to be a primary caregiver. Any thoughts from anyone? I don't want to overreact, but.....

[Anonymous]

you instinct is right-I posted and ad on craigslist and got tons of great responses and a very loving woman who is watching my child in my basement right now. Get someone else right away-There are tons of people who love kids who will be excited to see her each time and tell you all about her when you get her!!

[Anonymous]

Go with your gut and replace her... your child deserves to be "loved" by her care giver and there are lots of pople out there that can

[zumbamama]

I don't think you are overreacting. I would find a replacement asap.

I hired someone that came with good recommendations and references. But after several surprise visits, I observed there was hardly any interaction. Kids were glued to the tv while no one wiped the snot from their noses. That sitter lasted 2 weeks and then I found a GREAT one with smiles and energy.

[Anonymous]

Agree with others, time for a new arrangement.

This is one of the things I like about group daycare - if your child doesn't hit it off with one caregiver, there are always others. Also, there are multiple people around monitoring teacher/child interactions....

Good luck.

[Anonymous]

Just chiming in to say go with your gut. There are lots of great caregivers out there if you look. You don't have to settle.

[Anonymous]

I agree with the others.

Even an awesome caregiver may be a bad match with your child. As you said, not everyone likes each other. Sometimes it's the caregiver who doesn't bond with the child as much, other times it's the child with the caregiver. Not either person's fault generally, just the way it goes.

There's someone out there who will be a better match for her and enjoy her more!

[Anonymous]

Please find someone else to care for your child as soon as possible! If your DD does not want to be with her sitter it is a huge red flag! Good luck and All the best!

[Anonymous]

Switch sitters.

[Anonymous]

Ditto. Don't feel bad. None of this is easy, but sounds like you know what's good, so do some research, get a new sitter who will contribute to the village it takes to raise our kids.