I thought she would call me if she needed me…if she was in trouble…

[Anonymous]

The Great Wave of Kanagawa:

Your mother, who is not old–who is not that old–if you heard her age spoken aloud, without context, you might think of it as old,

but in the context of your mother is not that old, because she is very active and looks ten years younger than she is and sometimes doesn’t

return your calls for a few days because she doesn’t want to be one of those overbearing mothers–your mother who is not that old

dies in her own house during a heat wave the summer you turn 45, which is truly ridiculous.

You have air conditioning in your house. She could have

come over to your house, if you had known, if you had driven over to get her.

You didn’t even know how hot it was that week, not even when

you read about the record-setting temperatures, not even when you heard about the fifteen elderly people who died from the heat in

Chicago because your mother was not an elderly person and she would have called you, she absolutely would have called you, if she needed

you, if she had been in trouble.

Mallory Ortberg

No mom, no. No mom, mom, mom, no.

[Anonymous]

Pretty heavy for a post about "what your college posters say about you", eh?

[Anonymous]

Are these lyrics?

[Anonymous]

what

[Anonymous]

This is what OP is referencing: http://the-toast.net/2013/07/18/posters-to-run-away-from/

Why she is referencing it is another matter.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is what OP is referencing: http://the-toast.net/2013/07/18/posters-to-run-away-from/

Why she is referencing it is another matter.

Thank you for providing this reference. Yes, I'm a bit confused as to why this was posted. I did, though, read the blog post where it was lift, and the blog post was somewhat amusing.

[Anonymous]

“Nighthawks”: You were generally a B student in college. Your favorite book is The Catcher In The Rye. You have specific opinions about whiskey; whenever a woman orders clear liquor, you make some comment about it. Even if she already knows what you think of vodka, you want to make sure you remind her.

John Lennon wearing a white tank top and folding his arms: You find it physically painful to keep yourself from correcting someone else’s mistake, no matter how small or inconsequential, no matter whether you know them or not. Even if you’re not sure, exactly, that you’re right–really right, 100% right–you correct them so loftily, and with such certainty, that their entire recollection of your interaction is that of humiliation. Almost no one asks you what you’re up to on the weekend. This bothers you, but you cannot say exactly why.

Pretty funny. True?

[Anonymous]

Welcome to DCUM -- the Vicodin edition.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Welcome to DCUM -- the Vicodin edition.

Lulz.

[Anonymous]

OP here. I saw it and it really is a fear I have of my mom dying this way. I tell myself that she would call me if she needed help. But I know she won't.

[Anonymous]

OP, I get it.