Potty training-- stop or keep going?
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Anonymous
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We are on Day 3 of naked potty training with our 2.5 year old, and there has been no progress. The only time he has peed in the potty instead of the floor is when we make him sit until he pees. I know it's early, but I am ready to scrap the whole damn thing and try again in a month or two. We don't have any real time pressure to get PTing done. Daycare doesn't care, and in fact, will work on PTing him themselves while he's there. Another reason to wait is that his grandmother is coming to stay with him for a few days while we take a trip without him in about 2.5 weeks, and there's no way I'm going to ask her to deal with sitting him on the potty every thirty minutes or cleaning up accidents if he's not self-initiating by then.
It is entirely possible that I am looking for an excuse to quit because this process sucks and I'm tired of hanging out in my house staring at my naked toddler to see if he's about to pee. Are there alternatives to the naked PTing boot camp that actually work? I have never heard of people doing this any other way than just taking away the diapers and trying to catch the pee/regularly prompting to go potty, but if there's a lazier way, I'd love to hear it, even if it takes longer. Any and all advice is welcome, even if the advice is to stop being so lazy and suck it up and keep going. TIA! |
Anonymous
| Your heart isn't in it. You have to be committed and confident to make it work. If that's not now, wait until you feel you can do it. Otherwise the kid picks up on this and the process fails. |
Anonymous
| The lazy way is to wait until the kid is three and you can just buy him a present and tell him to start using he toilet. People on here love late training, so you will get a lot of advice to wait, and some will even at wait a whole year. |
Anonymous
| He is simply not ready and you are not either. Just wait a few months and put the pressure on the back burner. |
Anonymous
Call it lazy but to me this was far better. We waited until just turned 3, took away the diapers and there was a grand total of two accidents. One the first day and one the third day. No regrets here. |
Anonymous
| Has anybody regretted waiting until later? The potty training book I read said if you don't get it done by 2.5, it's much, much harder. |
Anonymous
People on this board like to wait until 3.5 or 4 and say they have no regrets. I have yet to encounter anyone like this in real life and assume waiting is embarrassing and humiliating for their children and that an anonymous forum is the only place they can feel normal. |
Anonymous
OP here. Yes, this is what I'm worried about. I know people who waited for a signal that their kid was ready and have four-year-old who still pees his pants. |
Anonymous
| When DS turned 2.5 I gave birth to his twin sisters. No way was I going to start potty training while dealing with two newborns. I was ready when he turned 3 years 3 months. I don't think he was embarrassed - who else cared that he was in diapers besides me? Was he ready? I don't know. I switched to underwear and he peed in them for two days. But then, on the 3rd day, something clicked. He peed in the potty from then on. Poop probably took another week before he was accident-free. And it was probably another year before he was consistently dry at night. Waiting worked for us! Good luck! |
Anonymous
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OP, I found the naked or stay home for 3 days in underwear options entirely stressful and not some magic bullet that people claim it is. My son is 2 yrs 11 months, and about 2 weekends ago we tried it - horrible couple days, never went on the actual potty once (would sit him every 20-30 minutes and he would still pee his pants in between). Then we set him to daycare in pullups for a few days and did underwear at night, again seemed to have little progress except maybe once or twice he timed it into the potty, then again the following weekend did some underwear -- some chunk of time in the morning one day, then pullups for out of the house bc we had something etc. So did most of a weekend but not as aggressively, and not obsessed with trying to get him to drink a ton which the 3 day methods suggest (and I found to be stressful in itself). Then that following monday sent him to daycare in underwear for the full week. Good amount of accidents but went with his friends on the potty and made some progress, following weekend in underwear and so on - so been a couple of weeks now and he's had many days at school with no accidents and can actually make it to the potty when he as to go. Definitely still in the potty check mode before and after every activity -- in and outside, before and after dinner, before a short tv show or 20-30 minutes of playing with toys etc. But he has gotten the hang of it so far.
So I guess my advice is probably to stop with the pressure on yourself until after your trip b.c. I don't think it is fair to leave the inlaws in the middle of this process, but still sit him on the potty frequently until then, and then start again after, except a lot of accidents and then just be consistent. At daycare and at home we're still doing pullups for nap, by the way. |
Anonymous
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You could do a half-assed approach, like we did. It suits the parents and kids who aren't in any particular rush, but think it's good to get things started.
Starting at around age 1.5 to 2, we start to put tot on the potty in the morning after wakeup, and at night before sleeping. Lots of excitement when a pee comes out! At around age 2 to 2.5, when tot starts telling you in some what that potty has just happened or is about to happen, add going to the potty at regular intervals during the day, and whisking off when he tells you he has to go right now. You know, when you can.  As in Saturday I have time, so we'll go potty every hour. Tuesday, I'm busy, so no deal: it's a diaper day! Let the child wear underpants after successfully going to the potty.
Around age 2.5 to almost 3, start training in earnest. Naked butt or underpants, only. Ask every hour if tot has to go potty, but don't put him on there "just because." Clean up messes without anger, just silently. Kid can help you clean up, too, if you're a soap-and-water family. Pullups only at night OR if you're going out and doing a cleanup is a major PITA. So that taaaaakes, wow, a year. |
Anonymous
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Anonymous
| We waited until DS was 3 yr 2 mos. Trained in 2 days. Ni regrets. |
Anonymous
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If naked potty training isn't working you could try the timed method. Make a big deal of buying him big boy underpants and let him pick them out. He wears the underwear and you put him on the potty every 1hr to 90 mins during the day. The only exceptions are pullups for naps and night sleeping. Explain he should tell you guys if he has to pee or poo and also read more kiddie books on using the potty to him during this phase.
Praise when he goes and gently remind him to tell you guys he needs to go when he has accidents. Eventually the timing between mandatory potty time gets longer as he controls his bladder and becomes more self sufficient. Wean off sleeping pull ups when he has several dry stretches. The day time training only takes a month (expect a few setbacks when kiddo gets sick, is really engrossed in play, etc...). Sleep potty training takes longer, but will happen eventually. |
Anonymous
| Why would you want to keep a child in diapers until they are 2.5 or 3? Unless the child has a medical reason for late potty training or they are special needs just do it. Believe me your daycare providers will thank you. |