I am content to be average at my job

[Anonymous]

I wish I was a career driven person but am just not, but am wondering if I can somehow get my ambition back. I was a National Merit Scholar, went to a top 5 university, have a joint JD and master's degree, but have somehow lost my ambition and am no longer career driven. I used to be, but after a series of career-related rejections I just stopped trying and caring. Now I guess that feel like the safer route is not to achieve, in order to not get rejected again. Work and excelling no longer interests me the way my mundane hobbies do. I enjoy my field (I am in the master's field of my joint degree), but really could take or leave working. I am content to be average in my job, and I don't really go above and beyond at work because I just don't have the ambition.

Can I become career driven again? I've become so apathetic. I find that I have more motivation to take care of my house (clean, organize) than excel in my job.

[Anonymous]

Most people don't really have the skills to manage a home, so kudos to you, OP.

[Anonymous]

If you are on the older side, I think a lot of people just don't give a F about being #1 as far as their careers go after a certain age. They probably have seen that their job is not their identity and there are other things they try to excel at.

[Anonymous]

I'm the same, OP, although no joint degree. But since I had my child I'm quite content to do B work at work and focus much more energy on family. I guess I didn't lean in.

[Anonymous]

How old are you? woman? Menopause? I'm in same situation. too much effort to go downtown and find a work. And often when I apply I am rejected for being "overqualified" (top of the line resume). Beginning to think it's not worth it. 3 children. One in college. Two in high school. Beginning to think it's best to focus on them and give up on career.

[Anonymous]

OP here. Why does age matter regarding this topic? I'm a 33 year old woman. I used to be ambitious, until age 28. Now I am content to be a "C student" at work. I wish I could get my ambition back, but I'm not sure I can because I'm so apathetic about working.

[Anonymous]

Do you feel a sting when you see other people excel around you that you think are less qualified/talented/intelligent than you?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Why does age matter regarding this topic? I'm a 33 year old woman. I used to be ambitious, until age 28. Now I am content to be a "C student" at work. I wish I could get my ambition back, but I'm not sure I can because I'm so apathetic about working.

Well, off the top of my head I could give you at least 15 reasons why age is relevant but since you are so snarky when I'm trying to help, I'm going bye-bye.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Why does age matter regarding this topic? I'm a 33 year old woman. I used to be ambitious, until age 28. Now I am content to be a "C student" at work. I wish I could get my ambition back, but I'm not sure I can because I'm so apathetic about working.

Well, off the top of my head I could give you at least 15 reasons why age is relevant but since you are so snarky when I'm trying to help, I'm going bye-bye.

NP here. I don't think OP's response was snarky. She just asked. Reread it and you'll see there's no snark at all.

I am also 33 and lost all ambition after having my kid. Also content to do C-level work at work. Frankly, I don't know that I'll ever care as much about work as I used to before I had my kid -- I'm not saying I'm some amazing mom and now I see my purpose in life or anything, just that I don't give a tinker's damn if I blow my boss's socks off anymore. I mean, who cares? I'd rather save my energy and be "on" with my kid at the end of the day. 1 hour of playing hide-and-seek and catching fireflies without stressing about checking my email is worth more than some meaningless departmental recognition or a marginal raise in salary.

[Anonymous]

Age matters bc at leAst in fed govt, the older people are often less motivated than the younger ones.

I am less motivated bc I realize I am prob not going to reach the goals I set for myself when I was younger. Due to the economy, I also had some periods of underemployment during which time I had to accept major ego hits and developed an attitude that I should not tie my self worth to my job.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Why does age matter regarding this topic? I'm a 33 year old woman. I used to be ambitious, until age 28. Now I am content to be a "C student" at work. I wish I could get my ambition back, but I'm not sure I can because I'm so apathetic about working.

Well, off the top of my head I could give you at least 15 reasons why age is relevant but since you are so snarky when I'm trying to help, I'm going bye-bye.

NP here. I don't think OP's response was snarky. She just asked. Reread it and you'll see there's no snark at all.

I am also 33 and lost all ambition after having my kid. Also content to do C-level work at work. Frankly, I don't know that I'll ever care as much about work as I used to before I had my kid -- I'm not saying I'm some amazing mom and now I see my purpose in life or anything, just that I don't give a tinker's damn if I blow my boss's socks off anymore. I mean, who cares? I'd rather save my energy and be "on" with my kid at the end of the day. 1 hour of playing hide-and-seek and catching fireflies without stressing about checking my email is worth more than some meaningless departmental recognition or a marginal raise in salary.

This X 100 (but I'm 34 with 2 kids).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Do you feel a sting when you see other people excel around you that you think are less qualified/talented/intelligent than you?

OP here. Sometimes. But I also think to myself, why can't I have their motivation? Where did my motivation go?

[Anonymous]

Everything has a season--that's how I see my work. I am not as motivated as I used to be, but I have an infant at home and a young elementary school child. I figure that I'm in my career for the long haul, so these few years I'm going to do my work but not really push above and beyond. When the kids are older and a bit more independent, then I assume that I'll give more energy into my career.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Everything has a season--that's how I see my work. I am not as motivated as I used to be, but I have an infant at home and a young elementary school child. I figure that I'm in my career for the long haul, so these few years I'm going to do my work but not really push above and beyond. When the kids are older and a bit more independent, then I assume that I'll give more energy into my career.

This was certainly true for me. I felt like I was sleepwalking through my thirties. From my late forties onward (I'm in my fifties now) work started to be more fun and more of a priority for me. I'm sure it's not coincidental that this happened as my kids matured and needed me less.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Why does age matter regarding this topic? I'm a 33 year old woman. I used to be ambitious, until age 28. Now I am content to be a "C student" at work. I wish I could get my ambition back, but I'm not sure I can because I'm so apathetic about working.

Well, off the top of my head I could give you at least 15 reasons why age is relevant but since you are so snarky when I'm trying to help, I'm going bye-bye.

NP here. I don't think OP's response was snarky. She just asked. Reread it and you'll see there's no snark at all.

I am also 33 and lost all ambition after having my kid. Also content to do C-level work at work. Frankly, I don't know that I'll ever care as much about work as I used to before I had my kid -- I'm not saying I'm some amazing mom and now I see my purpose in life or anything, just that I don't give a tinker's damn if I blow my boss's socks off anymore. I mean, who cares? I'd rather save my energy and be "on" with my kid at the end of the day. 1 hour of playing hide-and-seek and catching fireflies without stressing about checking my email is worth more than some meaningless departmental recognition or a marginal raise in salary.

This X 100 (but I'm 34 with 2 kids).

Me too to an extent. I'm 29 with a baby at home. I wouldn't say that I'm content to do C-level work, but I care a lot less about office politics and going the extra mile than I used to. I said to my husband at one point that I grew a human being and brought a life into the world; the office bullshit just doesn't seem very meaningful anymore.

I like my job in general, though, and my boss is fine with my part-time schedule. If I never get my former "ambition" back, I don't care that much. My DS is my focus now and as long as my boss is happy with my performance, I'm not planning to "lean in" any time soon.