Do you find yourself longing for your youth?

[Anonymous]

I am a 36YO mother of two. When I see twenty-somethings with their smooth skin and cute clothes, athletic bodies, etc. I feel sad that I am no longer that young. My hair is almost completely gray, my teeth are yellowing, my skin has lots of age spots, etc. My body isn't as flexible as it used to be, I don't have the athletic stamina that I used to...just 10 years ago, I was playing six or seven 90-minute soccer games a week -- a typical weekend would include three (and sometimes four) soccer games. I also find myself looking at my children, and their perfect little bodies, and I inwardly sigh at how perfect and young they are, and how old I am (and continue to get). I don't think that I will be one of those people who embraces the aging process...I think I will always look longingly on my earlier years. When I am 50, I'll probably look back to now and say "What the heck was I complaining about at 36?!"
Does anyone else experience this?

[Anonymous]

You can color your hair and whiten your teeth. Seems like you're just giving up

[Anonymous]

Fug that! I don't look back to my 20s, I look forward to fulfilling the promise of my 40s (and beyond). Every decade a woman embraces seems to improve her. Elegance, confidence, knowledge. The giant can of Don't Give a $%^& I plan on opening up on my 70th birthday is going to be a mind blower!

Make the most of what you have. Don't waste the time ahead.

[Anonymous]

Couldn't pay me enough money to go back to my 20s. My body may have been in better shape but my life certainly wasn't. That being said, I would kill for a good nap like I was able to take before kids. It's only 2 more hours until bedtime....

[Anonymous]

I do not look back fondly on my 20s. I do not miss my youth. In fact, you couldn't pay me enough to relive 18-30.

Ask me in 10 years, I may miss my 30s.

[Anonymous]

I agree in that I'm not the super toned young thing that I was at 25 (I'm 39 now). I also miss the carefree days and the ability to quite literally travel, pursue my hobbies, and socialize to my heart's content without having to be responsible to anyone else. That said, there are things you can do about most of the issues you mentioned.

- I use Crest whitestrips and for $29 actually saw a dramatic difference in my teeth. My dentist does teeth whitening for $500 so that's always an option too.

- I dye my hair every 3 - 4 weeks. I've started using e-salon and love it. The quality of the hair color is great.

- I splurged and got a personal trainer for six months (2 x a week). One of the best things I've done. My workouts are really productive and I better understand what works best for my body and how to get the results I want. Have lost 15 pounds and 2 sizes. Yes, it's hard to workout (I wake up at 5 AM and do a full hour before DDs wake up), but after a year of doing workouts 3 - 4 days a week and seeing results, I'm hooked. Best shape I've been in since I was in college (as much endurance, stamina, etc).

From your post it sounds like you're in a rut. The things you mention are largely physical and about your appearance, but I wonder if you might be a little depressed too. One thing I also did several years ago was go to therapy to address feelings I had of deep regret and a sense of hopelessness. It helped immensely. Something to consider.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am a 36YO mother of two. When I see twenty-somethings with their smooth skin and cute clothes, athletic bodies, etc. I feel sad that I am no longer that young. My hair is almost completely gray, my teeth are yellowing, my skin has lots of age spots, etc. My body isn't as flexible as it used to be, I don't have the athletic stamina that I used to...just 10 years ago, I was playing six or seven 90-minute soccer games a week -- a typical weekend would include three (and sometimes four) soccer games. I also find myself looking at my children, and their perfect little bodies, and I inwardly sigh at how perfect and young they are, and how old I am (and continue to get). I don't think that I will be one of those people who embraces the aging process...I think I will always look longingly on my earlier years. When I am 50, I'll probably look back to now and say "What the heck was I complaining about at 36?!"
Does anyone else experience this?

Yup. i just flipped through an old album today and cried. Most of it has to do with th fact the my parents are no longer alive, but also, that I am so far from being that teen ina loving embrace of my mom, yet it feels like it was yesterday...And that was a part od life hat supposedly goes by slowly. And yeah I don't look so hot now either.

[Anonymous]

Nope. I'll be 38 this year and I definitely am looking older. I have a ton of gray that I'm not going to color, I've gained a bunch of weight, and have a few wrinkles. I don't obsess about it because I'm too focused on other, more important things.

[Anonymous]

I understand OP. I went through that a few years ago. I longed for the days when I didn't have so many commitments.

But now at 46, I look better and am more fit than when I was in my 20s. I ran a marathon at 43 and am toned because I'm at the gym lifting weights. I feel sexier and more confident than ever. Yeah, I have more gray hair and my once perfect eyes started to struggle with the small print just before my birthday this past winter. Oh well. Those are things that some hair color and some funky reading glasses can cure.

[Anonymous]

30's were hard for me because you are just starting to age and your body changes after kids. Now I am in my 40's and I accept aging and don't feel so hung up on how I look. I do try and take care of myself but mostly because I would like to be around to see my future grandchildren and great-grandchildren. I think everyone goes through different stages of adapting to aging. I will tell you that time seems to speed up with every decade. You start to loose people you love and you realize you just need to make the most of it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I agree in that I'm not the super toned young thing that I was at 25 (I'm 39 now). I also miss the carefree days and the ability to quite literally travel, pursue my hobbies, and socialize to my heart's content without having to be responsible to anyone else. That said, there are things you can do about most of the issues you mentioned.

- I use Crest whitestrips and for $29 actually saw a dramatic difference in my teeth. My dentist does teeth whitening for $500 so that's always an option too.

- I dye my hair every 3 - 4 weeks. I've started using e-salon and love it. The quality of the hair color is great.

- I splurged and got a personal trainer for six months (2 x a week). One of the best things I've done. My workouts are really productive and I better understand what works best for my body and how to get the results I want. Have lost 15 pounds and 2 sizes. Yes, it's hard to workout (I wake up at 5 AM and do a full hour before DDs wake up), but after a year of doing workouts 3 - 4 days a week and seeing results, I'm hooked. Best shape I've been in since I was in college (as much endurance, stamina, etc).

From your post it sounds like you're in a rut. The things you mention are largely physical and about your appearance, but I wonder if you might be a little depressed too. One thing I also did several years ago was go to therapy to address feelings I had of deep regret and a sense of hopelessness. It helped immensely. Something to consider.

Hi PP, OP here. I guess I should have clarified that I do color my hair (but it's gray...that's why I have to color it! )

I have tried teeth-whitening products but my teeth are too sensitive for the hydrogen peroxide. I also tried the UV treatment at the dentist's office but it didn't really make a difference.

I'd love to get a personal trainer! I do work out, but a trainer would be awesome.

[Anonymous]

Once in awhile I remember what it was like to be very young. It is a different feeling for certain. Does not have so much to do with appearance. It is a feeling from inside.

[Anonymous]

What feeling are you talking about?

[Anonymous]

I miss parts of being young. Mostly the freedom and the sense of possibility. But there are so many things I don't miss - feeling insecure about just about everything at some point, worrying about what guys thought of me when dating and looking to date, and feeling lonely. Now that I have my husband, kids, a career I love, and life-long friends who made it through the years with me, I feel happy, lucky, and confident. Bring it on old age! But I was always a person who craved stability. I don't like extreme highs and lows and I feel like that sort of defines being young.

[Anonymous]

I find myself yearning for my college years sometimes. I was over the moon happy to have freedom and be surrounded by peers and partying a lot. I am glad I had that carefree phase because I don't feel like I missed out, but as someone said I miss the feeling of endless possibility and frankly I miss the hot bod I had back then, the metabolism and the youthful skin and hair.