OKay so I'm not a complete delicate flower who can't look at the news, but the constant barrage of shock and horror topics circulating through general parenting and OT are getting old. Mom kills newborn, dad rapes little kids, little boy rapes grandmother, etc.
This is the stuff that my 90 year old grandmother likes to discuss at the beauty salon because they get a little frisson of pleasure out of gawking at someone else's supreme, grotesque tragedy. I think we are all demeaned by participating. I'ts one thing to need a conversation, but is it so hard to put a "I was really disturbed by this horrible tragedy and want to talk about it" on the title, so bystanders don't have to get the horrible story itself thrown in their faces via the thread title? If people can't self police in this area, I suggest a shock topic forum wasteland where people can go to rubberneck and trade horror stories. Then if you go there, you can read horror stories to your hearts content. |
Wholeheartedly support this.
It's easy to say "don't click on it", but the awful story is in my head simply by reading down the list of threads when OPs post the details in the subject line. |
I don't like the threads, but there is no point in this. Many, many of us enter DCUm from Recent Topics, so it will be there anyway.
Maybe just guidelines about more appropriate titles. |
Where is the line between a legitimate news story that belongs in one of the current forums and a "horror" story that would need to be posted in a new forum?
|
Baby flushed down sewer pipe dad rapes children grandson rapes grandmother pedophilia is a growing problem in our society Growing trend of child abuse Which of these are shock topics? Well, you can tell by the prurient nature of the headline. I know 'em when i see them and I'd be really surprised if others can't recognize them either. Yes, there may be nuances "I can't get the images of those Cleveland women's injuries out of my head" etc that there could be some gray areas. But there's a difference between the first three topics I listed and the last two. Two are legitimate conversations and the others are SHOCK fodder. Many of your long-time users are getting sickened from the steady stream of horror and shock posts we've been seeing lately. It's very clear, Jeff, that people are trying to manipulate the emotions of others by forcing them to read this stuff. Again, if people can self police, and put a warning in their titles, or at least use some common sense so that the people using this forum (many of them new moms who are biologically prone to anxiety) can avoid them, then it's not an issue. But the issue is people are doing it intentionally to shock and upset the rest of us. I find myself getting inured to the posts now, just looking past them. But many people can't separate themselves, and in the right (or wrong) frame of mind, it can get in your head and wreck your day. I have posted before about something I was upset about - Syria, namely, and said I was really struggling to get the atrocieities out of my mind. But I didn't write "babies being ripped limb from limb" in my title. Yes, it's good that people know what is really happening so we can put pressure on officials to take action, but most of these posts aren't posted for that reason, they are posted to shock us and just make us feel anxious and helpless. It is absolutely, positively a form of trolling. Repugnant. So let them have their horror forum. It really would not be that hard. |
Guidelines, or just keep it off of recent topics, like the explicit forum. |
Yeah I could see a "horror" forum. |
tell that to cnn.com homepage |
If people can self police the sexually explicit stuff from the other relationship stuff then I think they can self police this.
|
I think this illustrates the problem here. I don't see "Baby flushed down sewer pipe" as being in the "horror" category at all. The baby lived and the father claimed it was an accident. It's more of a "News of the Weird" type of story. At least two people mentioned the story to me in real life. What about the grandmother that threw her grandchild off the walkway at Tysons? Is that a horror story or a news story since it happened where many of our posters shop? I think this is very much an "eye of the beholder" situation. It is different than the distinction between "explicit" and "non-explicit" topics because we have all socialized rules for making that distinction. That distinction exists throughout American culture. I can see this being one big argument about what should go where. And, that doesn't address the "Recent Topics" issue. If I create a horror forum and leave it out of "Recent Topics" I expect there will be resistance to using it. We can try to get users to be more sensitive about the topics they choose. I doubt it will have much effect, but we can try. But, here is where you can help. I need one line to go in the subject of a sticky post. Can you suggest language for that line? |
I'll tell you one thing. I'm a very longtime frequent user of DCUM. I am sure many people make empty threats like this all of the time but increasingly, OT has become a repository for just those types of threads. Yes, the tysons story stayed with me for a long time. And WHY exactly is it relevant to me, just because I shop there I want to hear about some terrible, horrible thing that has nothing to do with me? I avoid the news because I think it is disgusting half the time. I do NOT visit CNN for my news because of all of the prurient threads and graphic pictures. it's one thing to put them there with a warning (warning: graphic photos or graphic materials), and it's another thing altogether to put it in someone's face The sticky could read "do not post graphic or "shock" material - including news stories - in thread titles. But I agree it won't do much. To the extent that this forum does become a repository for lots of these stories, this long time user will truly be out. I avoid talking to family members or acquaintances who trade in this kind of gossip, and I'll avoid these forums if it continues to be a problem. And I am NOT saying this as an empty threat; I'm sure you won't miss me as one user, but I guarantee others feel similarly. You see the growing backlash. Maybe not all of the complainers will vote with their feet, but do you really want the forums to be turning into places where really sick people go to get off on sick stories about hurting kids? Because that's DEFINITELY a part of this. It's prurient. And like I said, most of us know it when we see it. ![]() |
But pp,there are many people who also read normal newa stories (such that you'd find on the news or CNN) who are also disturbed by some of these threads. I don't think it is realistic to expect NO news to be posted here because a select few who can't handle news of any type.
So. It is back to the same problem about how Jeff polices the posts that are "too much" |
NP here -I wish we could get these stories filtered in the media as a whole. while i know these stories are not new and have been happening since the beginning of time, it seems like the blatant disrespect for the victims and for privacy is more rampant than ever. |
Does someone need to be held while surfing DCUM? awwww. |
I totally agree. The difference between prurient horror story and something with news value will be a little subjective, but that shouldn't stop you, Jeff. News value = a story that goes farther than just the horrible tragedy itself, or involves people/ events that are in the public eye. So a story about bombing kids in Syria is news. But a story about one egregious incident of child abuse is not news. If there is a trial then the incident might become news, because it is now a public event (the trial). A story that actually helped educate people would be ok too - so a story that sought to explain how the system failed a particular abuse victim would be ok, but just dwelling on the horrible abuse, not ok. |