Has anyone sent their kid off to AAP without telling the kid what they're in?

[Anonymous]

If my son gets into AAP, I have considered not really telling him anything about it. He tends to be oblivious to these things, so I think he wouldn't notice for quite some time. Even if I send him to a Center, I might just tell him he's switching schools.

Has anyone done this? Any drawbacks? How did it work out?

We haven't talked to him at all about the screening process, and I don't want him to feel different-- either better or worse -- for being in AAP or not.

[Anonymous]

Our base school is a center school. I was amazed and thankful that even by second grade my daughter didn't know about the AAP center at her school. When she got in, we did NOT tell her what she was entering though I knew in time she would find out.
Unfortunately, before the end of the school year a classmate who had also gotten in bragged about how it was "only for the smartest kids.". I told my daughter that her friend was wrong but it made my daughter confused.

[Anonymous]

We explained that DS was going there because they teach in a way that is best for the way he learns. it was for naught, though, because he immediately said, "Oh, so I'm smart." The kids all know and all talk about it no matter how you sidestep it (which we did because we believe in praising effort not talent).

[Anonymous]

We talked about it -what might be different, what would be the same. Wouldn't it be a strange feeling to walk into school and suddenly it moves faster and the students are different? I think it would be jarring to go from being at the top math group to maybe not getting through math as easily. I err on the side of my kids hearing it from me, rather than classmates.

[Anonymous]

Our base school is a center school. I was amazed and thankful that even by second grade my daughter didn't know about the AAP center at her school. When she got in, we did NOT tell her what she was entering though I knew in time she would find out.
Unfortunately, before the end of the school year a classmate who had also gotten in bragged about how it was "only for the smartest kids.". I told my daughter that her friend was wrong but it made my daughter confused.

Weird. Well actually, more like creepy.

So mom, why am I in "Division A" in swimming? Is it because I am a good swimmer. Mom - No. No, absolutely not.

So mom, why am I in AAP? Is it because my teachers think that I am good student and a fast learner. Mom - No. No that is wrong.

Mom, I am so confused...

[Anonymous]

"the school decides to place some kids in AAP classes because they are able to learn quickly."

Don't say smarter
Don't say "...than other kids..."
Don't make a big deal out of it.

Some kids need special Ed, some need general Ed, and some need AAP. No one is destined for a life as a barista, the future is wide open for all of them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Our base school is a center school. I was amazed and thankful that even by second grade my daughter didn't know about the AAP center at her school. When she got in, we did NOT tell her what she was entering though I knew in time she would find out.
Unfortunately, before the end of the school year a classmate who had also gotten in bragged about how it was "only for the smartest kids.". I told my daughter that her friend was wrong but it made my daughter confused.

Weird. Well actually, more like creepy.

So mom, why am I in "Division A" in swimming? Is it because I am a good swimmer. Mom - No. No, absolutely not.

So mom, why am I in AAP? Is it because my teachers think that I am good student and a fast learner. Mom - No. No that is wrong.

Mom, I am so confused...

I agree with the premise of this post (though would not have phrased it that way). I do think being upfront about what is happening is important. I also agree on not going overboard and saying it's because DC is so smart or whatever. I would prefer to avoid labeling. It puts more pressure on the kid plus if it just doesn't work for the child, then they would feel like a failure.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Our base school is a center school. I was amazed and thankful that even by second grade my daughter didn't know about the AAP center at her school. When she got in, we did NOT tell her what she was entering though I knew in time she would find out.
Unfortunately, before the end of the school year a classmate who had also gotten in bragged about how it was "only for the smartest kids.". I told my daughter that her friend was wrong but it made my daughter confused.

Why did you lie to your child?

[Anonymous]

I'm trying hard to understand the point in not telling them...

[Anonymous]

We moved here after AAP had started, so we didn't have to go through the selection process. I explained that the schools used the testing information to decide which class would be the best fit for my child, which is true.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:"the school decides to place some kids in AAP classes because they are able to learn quickly."

Don't say smarter
Don't say "...than other kids..."
Don't make a big deal out of it.

Some kids need special Ed, some need general Ed, and some need AAP. No one is destined for a life as a barista, the future is wide open for all of them.

...Some kids need special ed AND AAP.

[Anonymous]

Kids are not dumb. Just tell them the facts and truth.
At the same time, do your good parenting thing.

[Anonymous]

Also repeatedly saying smart may have negative affect on the kid, but like once in a year? won't hurt.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm trying hard to understand the point in not telling them...

Because there are studies that show that children perform better academically when they are praised for effort, not intelligence. If you tell them they are smart, they don't feel they have to work as hard. In the end, though, they're smart kids and they figure it out.

Also, there is a whole thread on AAP'ers bullying Gen Ed'ers. ALthough I'm not sure I believe the thread, I would want to avoid the possibility of that situation.

[Anonymous]

My kids are smart enough to be in AAP.
I can talk to them. They understand it, and are cool about it. Just don't praise them that they are smart often.