Help me decide - which house?

[Anonymous]

I'm a former DC resident, now living in a market that is not quite as hot as the DC market (but warming quickly). There are two houses we're considering (or third option - build). Help me think through this rationally, please! (Options below listed in order of discovery, not preference or ranking.) We have four kids ages 6 and under, and one parent occasionally works from home. Younger kids are home with nanny during the day.

House 1:
Pros: shortest commute to work, closest to grandparents, and elementary school would be closest to my office; house has option to have enough bedrooms (5) on one floor for each family member (kids are young so it is important to me that all are on same floor). New construction so presumably low maintenance. Nice layout generally. Full of high tech stuff everywhere - speakers, iPod jacks, home networks, etc.
Cons: the worst lot ever. It backs up to a wetland, and there is literally no back yard space other than a then strip of grass and then a drop off into a swamp (what we used to call wetlands, remember?). Tiny tiny side/front yard space. Nearest park is a half mile away. Also, kitchen has a layout I don't love - the center island has a gas range in the middle, so if anyone is seated at the counter they are essentially sitting 14 inches from the gas range. Most expensive house in the neighborhood by a significant amount.

House 2:
Pros: two year old home of a builder so "fully loaded" in terms of finishes and upgrades, presumably low maintenance. Four bedrooms upstairs, one in basement; home office space on main level; walkout basement, nice yard; neighboring houses are equal or higher in price. Nice area close to interesting stuff. Extra bathroom upstairs (one in master, one jack and Jill, one in a kid bedroom).
Cons: longer commute to work; longer distance from my office to elementary; longer distance to helpful grandparents. No apparent option to have 5th BR upstairs so 2 kids would definitely share room. "Used" rather than new so at least a little wear and tear, though I don't see this as a significant "con".

Third option: build.
Pros: get the house we want; pretty lots with access to nice neighborhood stuff.
Cons: time; same commute issues as house 2; possibility of needing to move twice; possibility of murdering my husband during the construction process due to marital discord.

Opinions wanted! (Except for opinions about how awful new construction is; yes, I know, but after living in 80-90 year old houses for the past ten years, and realizing that my husband will never do home maintenance on a house like that, it's time to embrace new.)

[Anonymous]

House 2.

Young kids actually love sharing rooms with their siblings.

By the time having their own room really matters, at least one of your kids will be old enough (young teens) to move to the basement.

[Anonymous]

Depends on how important it is to be outside for your family. No 1 would not even be in the running for us. Good luck

[Anonymous]

How much further are option 2 and 3? 10 min? 30 min?

From what I've read so far, I'd probably go with house #2 if it wasn't too too much further away (10-15 min).

[Anonymous]

I would go with house #2 unless the distances were more than 30 minutes more.

[Anonymous]

OP here. House 1 is a 10-15 minute commute. House 2 is 25-30 minutes.

[Anonymous]

so 15 more minutes from grandparents, etc? I'd go for #2 or #3 if you think you can survive the construction.

I think it's great when kids share a room!

[Anonymous]

House 3. get exactly what you want. (minus the commute.)

[Anonymous]

Keep looking!

[Anonymous]

1

[Anonymous]

House 2!

[Anonymous]

2

[Anonymous]

House 2

[Anonymous]

OP here. Thanks for the opinions. For anyone willing to comment further - what would you weight most heavily in these choices? I see lots of "house 2" responses but I'm wondering what's behind everyone's choices. (And thanks to those who have already provided their rationale.)

[Anonymous]

Could you sit tight during construction or would you have to move to a short term rental? That might drive me batty.

And I totally hear you on new construction - we recently moved from a 2000s built house to one built in the '60s. New neighborhood and jobs are great, house has cool features. But, I kinda miss the modern wiring, properly insulated windows, working basement sump pump, etc I definitely spend more time on maintenance now.