How to get out of debt!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have about $55K of credit card debt and $27K of auto loan. Overall, my minimum monthly payments are about $2700-2800 when my take home per month is about $4500 as a nurse making $60-65K/year. On top of debt, I still have to pay rent, utilities, groceries, gas, etc. I stay very depressed that I would never be able to get out of this. I want to go back to school to get advance nursing degree(paid by hospital) but have to adjust on my hours.

I am 42F and single.

The Internet is filled with so many useful information about Debra Evans Flyte. She'll definitely help.

Her stuff is ok. I wasn't impressed by it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ditto for always working two jobs. I waitress a few night every week after teaching all day. I also tutor and I’ve worked as a summer nanny for years. My kid is in college now and most of what I’ve earned over the years in these jobs is what is now paying for his college. Single moms don’t have a lot of choices so you do what you have to do. I have a rare day off today and it feels luxurious.

I’ve been in the OP’s shoes and paid off upwards of $30k in debt. Not easy but doable. I transferred everything to zero interest cards which helped a lot. I negotiated the medical debt down as much as possible.

How old are you and how long you have been doing two jobs? Kuddos to you for sending your kid to college through your second job, It is not easy but we know what we do for our kids.

I’ve been tutoring from home since my kids were old enough to occupy themselves for an hour at a time. They were probably 7 and 9 at the time. Maybe 6 and 8. The waitress job started when I could leave them home alone so maybe when they were both in MS. I’m 50 now. I’ll keep waitressing for a few more years to help them get on their feet after college. By now my teaching salary isn’t as low so I’ll be able to afford not working other jobs (although I always work in the summer).

That's amazing. Not everyone has the commitment to continuously do it and support their families.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have about $55K of credit card debt and $27K of auto loan. Overall, my minimum monthly payments are about $2700-2800 when my take home per month is about $4500 as a nurse making $60-65K/year. On top of debt, I still have to pay rent, utilities, groceries, gas, etc. I stay very depressed that I would never be able to get out of this. I want to go back to school to get advance nursing degree(paid by hospital) but have to adjust on my hours.

I am 42F and single.

Pick up more hours or pick up a PRN position. I'm an RN with a FT position and 3 casual plus a CNA teaching gig in the works. The world is my oyster

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have about $55K of credit card debt and $27K of auto loan. Overall, my minimum monthly payments are about $2700-2800 when my take home per month is about $4500 as a nurse making $60-65K/year. On top of debt, I still have to pay rent, utilities, groceries, gas, etc. I stay very depressed that I would never be able to get out of this. I want to go back to school to get advance nursing degree(paid by hospital) but have to adjust on my hours.

I am 42F and single.

Pick up more hours or pick up a PRN position. I'm an RN with a FT position and 3 casual plus a CNA teaching gig in the works. The world is my oyster

I think OP is an LPN and going for an RN degree. You do get paid more as an RN. She is already working enough hours as that + school. she is stretched as much as possible with all her time and bare bone expenses. It is a tough spot.

[Anonymous]

OP, have you thought about starting an onlyfans or working as an escort? Fortunately for you, there are still a lot of stupid and desperate men willing to voluntarily hand over their hard money for excitement via pixels or meaningless sex in person.

Take advantage of this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, have you thought about starting an onlyfans or working as an escort? Fortunately for you, there are still a lot of stupid and desperate men willing to voluntarily hand over their hard money for excitement via pixels or meaningless sex in person.

Take advantage of this.

are you serious? not everyone is ok in selling their body and some people want to do it on their own. Also, OP mentioned that she is overweight with some medical issues so not sure how attractive she looks.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, have you thought about starting an onlyfans or working as an escort? Fortunately for you, there are still a lot of stupid and desperate men willing to voluntarily hand over their hard money for excitement via pixels or meaningless sex in person.

Take advantage of this.

are you serious? not everyone is ok in selling their body and some people want to do it on their own. Also, OP mentioned that she is overweight with some medical issues so not sure how attractive she looks.

Hey some people like them fat. Desperate men will run through anything and pay $$$$ to do it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, have you thought about starting an onlyfans or working as an escort? Fortunately for you, there are still a lot of stupid and desperate men willing to voluntarily hand over their hard money for excitement via pixels or meaningless sex in person.

Take advantage of this.

are you serious? not everyone is ok in selling their body and some people want to do it on their own. Also, OP mentioned that she is overweight with some medical issues so not sure how attractive she looks.

Hey some people like them fat. Desperate men will run through anything and pay $$$$ to do it.

Not everyone gets paid on OF otherwise there would be no broke women. lol

[Anonymous]

With the numbers in that thread, the big issue isn’t “motivation,” it’s math: $4,500 take-home with $2,700–$2,800 minimums leaves ~$1,700 for all living costs. That’s why it feels impossible — the current payment structure is basically designed to keep you stuck.

Here’s a practical, step-by-step way out that people in this situation actually use.

1) Stabilize cash flow first (so you stop going negative)

Priority order for payments:
1. Rent + utilities + food + basic transportation + insurance + meds
2. Car payment (only if you truly need the car to keep working)
3. Credit cards (because they’re unsecured, and you need breathing room)

If you’re going negative some months, you need a payment reset on the cards — not just “spend less.”

2) Reduce the credit card payment dramatically (this is the lever)

Best “middle path” for many people: a nonprofit Debt Management Plan (DMP)

This is run by nonprofit credit counseling agencies (not a settlement company). They:
• negotiate lower interest rates (often a lot lower),
• roll cards into one monthly payment,
• aim for payoff in 3–5 years.

For $55k, a 5-year payoff at reduced interest might land around ~$1,050–$1,200/month (ballpark). That’s often way less than typical minimums on $55k.

What it costs: usually a small monthly fee. Downsides: cards are typically closed while on the plan (which is often a good thing when you’re trying to stop the bleeding).

What I’d avoid unless your credit is strong
• Personal loan consolidation: can be fine if you qualify for a meaningfully lower rate and don’t run cards back up.
• 0% balance transfers: usually unrealistic at this debt level unless credit is excellent and you have a plan to pay aggressively before promo ends.
• Debt settlement: can cause missed payments, collections, taxes on “forgiven” debt, and credit damage.

3) Fix the car situation (a $700 payment is crushing you)

A $700/month car payment on this income is a major constraint.

Options in order of “least disruptive” to “most”:
• Refinance the auto loan (if credit allows) to cut payment.
• Extend term (not ideal long-term, but sometimes necessary short-term).
• Sell and replace with a cheaper reliable car (often the biggest monthly relief).

Even dropping from $700 → $350 frees $4,200/year — that’s real progress.

4) Cut expenses, but focus on the big 2–3 items

People get stuck obsessing over coffee while rent and cars eat the budget.

Big wins usually come from:
• Housing: roommate, cheaper unit, negotiate renewal, relocate closer to work.
• Car: as above.
• Insurance/phone/subscriptions: quick trim.
• Medical bills: ask providers for financial assistance, income-based discounts, or interest-free payment plans.

5) Increase income in a way you can actually sustain

You don’t need to “hustle nonstop.” You need consistent, tolerable extra margin.

For nursing schedules, what often works is:
• One extra shift every 2 weeks (or per month), not every week.
• PRN/per-diem at one place (higher hourly, you choose shifts).
• If your facility offers shift differentials, pick the highest-paid shifts you can tolerate.

Even $400–$600 extra/month makes a big difference once your card payment is reduced via DMP/hardship.

6) School: pause or proceed depending on the cash-flow impact

If an advanced degree is fully paid by the hospital and realistically raises income, it can be part of the solution — but not if it reduces hours and makes you miss payments.

A good rule:
• If school will reduce income before you’ve restructured payments, delay.
• If school increases income without tanking cash flow (or after DMP lowers payments), proceed.

7) Bankruptcy isn’t “evil,” but it’s not step one either

The “live it up, buy resale items, then file” advice is… genuinely bad.

A consultation with a bankruptcy attorney can be smart if:
• you can’t get a workable DMP/hardship plan,
• you’re behind or about to be behind,
• the payment math doesn’t work even after big cuts.

Chapter 7/13 are complex and location-dependent, so it’s worth a real consult if you’re considering it — but many people at this debt/income level first try DMP + car/housing changes because it preserves more options.

A simple “next 7 days” action list
1. Make a bare-bones budget: rent, utilities, food, gas, insurance, meds.
2. Call every credit card and ask for the hardship program (rate reduction / payment reduction).
3. Contact a nonprofit credit counseling agency and ask for a DMP quote (monthly payment + total fees + timeline).
4. Get refinance quotes for the car (or check what selling would net).
5. Freeze/lock cards so you can’t add debt while restructuring.
6. If depression is heavy: use your hospital’s EAP (it’s exactly for this) — debt stress is brutal and you deserve support while you tackle it.

If you want, paste a quick breakdown of rent + car interest rate/term + credit card APR range, and I’ll show what a realistic monthly plan could look like (including what needs to change to make the math work).

[Anonymous]

Yes that was ChatGPT 5.2 but it’s good advice all around.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:With the numbers in that thread, the big issue isn’t “motivation,” it’s math: $4,500 take-home with $2,700–$2,800 minimums leaves ~$1,700 for all living costs. That’s why it feels impossible — the current payment structure is basically designed to keep you stuck.

Here’s a practical, step-by-step way out that people in this situation actually use.

1) Stabilize cash flow first (so you stop going negative)

Priority order for payments:
1. Rent + utilities + food + basic transportation + insurance + meds
2. Car payment (only if you truly need the car to keep working)
3. Credit cards (because they’re unsecured, and you need breathing room)

If you’re going negative some months, you need a payment reset on the cards — not just “spend less.”

2) Reduce the credit card payment dramatically (this is the lever)

Best “middle path” for many people: a nonprofit Debt Management Plan (DMP)

This is run by nonprofit credit counseling agencies (not a settlement company). They:
• negotiate lower interest rates (often a lot lower),
• roll cards into one monthly payment,
• aim for payoff in 3–5 years.

For $55k, a 5-year payoff at reduced interest might land around ~$1,050–$1,200/month (ballpark). That’s often way less than typical minimums on $55k.

What it costs: usually a small monthly fee. Downsides: cards are typically closed while on the plan (which is often a good thing when you’re trying to stop the bleeding).

What I’d avoid unless your credit is strong
• Personal loan consolidation: can be fine if you qualify for a meaningfully lower rate and don’t run cards back up.
• 0% balance transfers: usually unrealistic at this debt level unless credit is excellent and you have a plan to pay aggressively before promo ends.
• Debt settlement: can cause missed payments, collections, taxes on “forgiven” debt, and credit damage.

3) Fix the car situation (a $700 payment is crushing you)

A $700/month car payment on this income is a major constraint.

Options in order of “least disruptive” to “most”:
• Refinance the auto loan (if credit allows) to cut payment.
• Extend term (not ideal long-term, but sometimes necessary short-term).
• Sell and replace with a cheaper reliable car (often the biggest monthly relief).

Even dropping from $700 → $350 frees $4,200/year — that’s real progress.

4) Cut expenses, but focus on the big 2–3 items

People get stuck obsessing over coffee while rent and cars eat the budget.

Big wins usually come from:
• Housing: roommate, cheaper unit, negotiate renewal, relocate closer to work.
• Car: as above.
• Insurance/phone/subscriptions: quick trim.
• Medical bills: ask providers for financial assistance, income-based discounts, or interest-free payment plans.

5) Increase income in a way you can actually sustain

You don’t need to “hustle nonstop.” You need consistent, tolerable extra margin.

For nursing schedules, what often works is:
• One extra shift every 2 weeks (or per month), not every week.
• PRN/per-diem at one place (higher hourly, you choose shifts).
• If your facility offers shift differentials, pick the highest-paid shifts you can tolerate.

Even $400–$600 extra/month makes a big difference once your card payment is reduced via DMP/hardship.

6) School: pause or proceed depending on the cash-flow impact

If an advanced degree is fully paid by the hospital and realistically raises income, it can be part of the solution — but not if it reduces hours and makes you miss payments.

A good rule:
• If school will reduce income before you’ve restructured payments, delay.
• If school increases income without tanking cash flow (or after DMP lowers payments), proceed.

7) Bankruptcy isn’t “evil,” but it’s not step one either

The “live it up, buy resale items, then file” advice is… genuinely bad.

A consultation with a bankruptcy attorney can be smart if:
• you can’t get a workable DMP/hardship plan,
• you’re behind or about to be behind,
• the payment math doesn’t work even after big cuts.

Chapter 7/13 are complex and location-dependent, so it’s worth a real consult if you’re considering it — but many people at this debt/income level first try DMP + car/housing changes because it preserves more options.

A simple “next 7 days” action list
1. Make a bare-bones budget: rent, utilities, food, gas, insurance, meds.
2. Call every credit card and ask for the hardship program (rate reduction / payment reduction).
3. Contact a nonprofit credit counseling agency and ask for a DMP quote (monthly payment + total fees + timeline).
4. Get refinance quotes for the car (or check what selling would net).
5. Freeze/lock cards so you can’t add debt while restructuring.
6. If depression is heavy: use your hospital’s EAP (it’s exactly for this) — debt stress is brutal and you deserve support while you tackle it.

If you want, paste a quick breakdown of rent + car interest rate/term + credit card APR range, and I’ll show what a realistic monthly plan could look like (including what needs to change to make the math work).

This is excellent, PP. I am not OP but looks like you have spend a good amount of time helping OP and now it is upto her to take the advice. BTW, she did refi the car and her monthly payments have dropped.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, have you thought about starting an onlyfans or working as an escort? Fortunately for you, there are still a lot of stupid and desperate men willing to voluntarily hand over their hard money for excitement via pixels or meaningless sex in person.

Take advantage of this.

are you serious? not everyone is ok in selling their body and some people want to do it on their own. Also, OP mentioned that she is overweight with some medical issues so not sure how attractive she looks.

Hey some people like them fat. Desperate men will run through anything and pay $$$$ to do it.

Not everyone gets paid on OF otherwise there would be no broke women. lol

LOL! so true.

[Anonymous]

are you expecting a tax refund, OP? if yes, then make sure you completely pay off cards with small balance first.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op here. I am an LPN and work as a nurse in the surgery center. Extra hours are available but it also gets very tiring.

I got some of this debt after my divorce and part of it is me spending a little too much but I hv learned my lesson. Car payment is about $700/mo and I hv some medical issues too that takes away some of the cash. Can’t get rid of car since I do hv to travel to see my family.

$700 a month car payment on $65k a year? You need to sell that thing and get a $20k car.

Op ignore this person. Your car is reliable. There is nothing for 20k that is reliable.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op here. I am an LPN and work as a nurse in the surgery center. Extra hours are available but it also gets very tiring.

I got some of this debt after my divorce and part of it is me spending a little too much but I hv learned my lesson. Car payment is about $700/mo and I hv some medical issues too that takes away some of the cash. Can’t get rid of car since I do hv to travel to see my family.

$700 a month car payment on $65k a year? You need to sell that thing and get a $20k car.

Op ignore this person. Your car is reliable. There is nothing for 20k that is reliable.

yeah, the current loan is probably around $20K and selling this car to buy a new one for around the same price is plain stupid.