AITA: Commuting on Metro; Unvaccinated Kids

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Metro is SO much safer than driving! Car accidents are likely a bigger risk to your family as a whole than your kids getting covid.

What is your obsession with car accidents? Were you in a bad one? Stop minimizing covid. You could really hurt someone with your bad advice. How would you feel if someone listened to you and their child died?

[Anonymous]

I don't get why you'd risk flying and if you aren't being careful, what is the issue? Going back to work in person is risky as well.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Metro is SO much safer than driving! Car accidents are likely a bigger risk to your family as a whole than your kids getting covid.

What is your obsession with car accidents? Were you in a bad one? Stop minimizing covid. You could really hurt someone with your bad advice. How would you feel if someone listened to you and their child died?

Another NUTTER alert!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Metro is SO much safer than driving! Car accidents are likely a bigger risk to your family as a whole than your kids getting covid.

totally.

Agreed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:YTA without question. I cannot believe that you are flying in December (the busiest time of the year!) to visit an unvaccinated infant but you are mad that your vaccinated, mask-wearing husband is taking Metro. WTF lady.

+1 Seriously.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Just curious what OP is thinking given the majority of these responses. Has she changed her mind?

OP here. Thanks all. I am less angry about it after reading the responses. I still would prefer that he drive in, though, at least until news on how Delta works is more clear, but I am less resentful and more calm and accepting about it.

I think some of it was also that he just decided this is what he was going to do-- no discussion with me about it that was frustrating. As well as the news of the Delta variant being transmissible through vaccinated people.

We do have our kids in day care, but to me that is different than the metro, because it is a pod-like setting, with the same people, masks mandated, teachers vaccinated, and protocols for symptoms, exposure, temperature testing, etc. And also it would be a more significant hardship to pull them from school, in my mind at least, than for him to drive in to work, so there is a different benefit/risk analysis. And he does have some risk at work, but again, it is a pod-like setting, with everyone in their office with doors closed and masked- they are still meeting over zoom despite being in the office. It is all surface streets for the commute, so not like he is speeding along on the freeway with that risk. And I used to drive in for the commute before, so to me it wasn't a hardship, in fact it saves time overall so he could get home earlier to spend more time with family. And we aren't going indoors in stores, only outside play with the kids, so still trying to minimize risk there.

For the trip in December, we are going out first week of the month, not over Christmas, so it is not the busiest time, and we are not visiting an infant- the child will be almost 2 so they are not in the 12 months or younger elevated risk category- they also are flying in from out of state as well, whether we come or not. And honestly, I booked it before news of the Delta virus came thinking the pandemic would be more under control, so yeah, may be rethinking the trip depending on what the news is at that time.

So, still not super excited about regular metro use again now, but not feeling as resentful about it. Thanks all.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just curious what OP is thinking given the majority of these responses. Has she changed her mind?

OP here. Thanks all. I am less angry about it after reading the responses. I still would prefer that he drive in, though, at least until news on how Delta works is more clear, but I am less resentful and more calm and accepting about it.

I think some of it was also that he just decided this is what he was going to do-- no discussion with me about it that was frustrating. As well as the news of the Delta variant being transmissible through vaccinated people.

We do have our kids in day care, but to me that is different than the metro, because it is a pod-like setting, with the same people, masks mandated, teachers vaccinated, and protocols for symptoms, exposure, temperature testing, etc. And also it would be a more significant hardship to pull them from school, in my mind at least, than for him to drive in to work, so there is a different benefit/risk analysis. And he does have some risk at work, but again, it is a pod-like setting, with everyone in their office with doors closed and masked- they are still meeting over zoom despite being in the office. It is all surface streets for the commute, so not like he is speeding along on the freeway with that risk. And I used to drive in for the commute before, so to me it wasn't a hardship, in fact it saves time overall so he could get home earlier to spend more time with family. And we aren't going indoors in stores, only outside play with the kids, so still trying to minimize risk there.

For the trip in December, we are going out first week of the month, not over Christmas, so it is not the busiest time, and we are not visiting an infant- the child will be almost 2 so they are not in the 12 months or younger elevated risk category- they also are flying in from out of state as well, whether we come or not. And honestly, I booked it before news of the Delta virus came thinking the pandemic would be more under control, so yeah, may be rethinking the trip depending on what the news is at that time.

So, still not super excited about regular metro use again now, but not feeling as resentful about it. Thanks all.

I'm glad you are taking in different perspectives, OP. The bolded is a bit of a fallacy by the way. Plus highway accidents/death increased noticeably during the pandemic despite fewer people on the roads.

https://www.economist.com/graphic-detail/2021/04/03/americans-are-driving-less-but-more-are-dying-in-accidents

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Metro is SO much safer than driving! Car accidents are likely a bigger risk to your family as a whole than your kids getting covid.

What is your obsession with car accidents? Were you in a bad one? Stop minimizing covid. You could really hurt someone with your bad advice. How would you feel if someone listened to you and their child died?

how about stop minimizing car accidents?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:YTA without question. I cannot believe that you are flying in December (the busiest time of the year!) to visit an unvaccinated infant but you are mad that your vaccinated, mask-wearing husband is taking Metro. WTF lady.

+1. You are so off base here. Your kids are more likely to be affected by pollution-induced illnesses due to people driving everywhere then they are to catch covid from your husband taking metro in a mask while vaccinated. Take a Xanax and get some perspective.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just curious what OP is thinking given the majority of these responses. Has she changed her mind?

OP here. Thanks all. I am less angry about it after reading the responses. I still would prefer that he drive in, though, at least until news on how Delta works is more clear, but I am less resentful and more calm and accepting about it.

I think some of it was also that he just decided this is what he was going to do-- no discussion with me about it that was frustrating. As well as the news of the Delta variant being transmissible through vaccinated people.

We do have our kids in day care, but to me that is different than the metro, because it is a pod-like setting, with the same people, masks mandated, teachers vaccinated, and protocols for symptoms, exposure, temperature testing, etc. And also it would be a more significant hardship to pull them from school, in my mind at least, than for him to drive in to work, so there is a different benefit/risk analysis. And he does have some risk at work, but again, it is a pod-like setting, with everyone in their office with doors closed and masked- they are still meeting over zoom despite being in the office. It is all surface streets for the commute, so not like he is speeding along on the freeway with that risk. And I used to drive in for the commute before, so to me it wasn't a hardship, in fact it saves time overall so he could get home earlier to spend more time with family. And we aren't going indoors in stores, only outside play with the kids, so still trying to minimize risk there.

For the trip in December, we are going out first week of the month, not over Christmas, so it is not the busiest time, and we are not visiting an infant- the child will be almost 2 so they are not in the 12 months or younger elevated risk category- they also are flying in from out of state as well, whether we come or not. And honestly, I booked it before news of the Delta virus came thinking the pandemic would be more under control, so yeah, may be rethinking the trip depending on what the news is at that time.

So, still not super excited about regular metro use again now, but not feeling as resentful about it. Thanks all.

I'm glad you are taking in different perspectives, OP. The bolded is a bit of a fallacy by the way. Plus highway accidents/death increased noticeably during the pandemic despite fewer people on the roads.

https://www.economist.com/graphic-detail/2021/04/03/americans-are-driving-less-but-more-are-dying-in-accidents

Seriously, have you seen surface street in the city recently? People speed like mad. Also I was hit by a a driver on a surface street and broke my leg so would very much prefer is people who don’t feel comfortable driving and prefer taking the metro do in fact take metro.

[Anonymous]

He should switch to a bike. Safer than a car, no risk of disease transmission, and healthier for him and the planet.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just curious what OP is thinking given the majority of these responses. Has she changed her mind?

OP here. Thanks all. I am less angry about it after reading the responses. I still would prefer that he drive in, though, at least until news on how Delta works is more clear, but I am less resentful and more calm and accepting about it.

I think some of it was also that he just decided this is what he was going to do-- no discussion with me about it that was frustrating. As well as the news of the Delta variant being transmissible through vaccinated people.

We do have our kids in day care, but to me that is different than the metro, because it is a pod-like setting, with the same people, masks mandated, teachers vaccinated, and protocols for symptoms, exposure, temperature testing, etc. And also it would be a more significant hardship to pull them from school, in my mind at least, than for him to drive in to work, so there is a different benefit/risk analysis. And he does have some risk at work, but again, it is a pod-like setting, with everyone in their office with doors closed and masked- they are still meeting over zoom despite being in the office. It is all surface streets for the commute, so not like he is speeding along on the freeway with that risk. And I used to drive in for the commute before, so to me it wasn't a hardship, in fact it saves time overall so he could get home earlier to spend more time with family. And we aren't going indoors in stores, only outside play with the kids, so still trying to minimize risk there.

For the trip in December, we are going out first week of the month, not over Christmas, so it is not the busiest time, and we are not visiting an infant- the child will be almost 2 so they are not in the 12 months or younger elevated risk category- they also are flying in from out of state as well, whether we come or not. And honestly, I booked it before news of the Delta virus came thinking the pandemic would be more under control, so yeah, may be rethinking the trip depending on what the news is at that time.

So, still not super excited about regular metro use again now, but not feeling as resentful about it. Thanks all.

I would say that even with that background, if he is well masked, it's still YTA. But a nice A who is taking feedback gracefully.

[Anonymous]

I’m 7+ months pregnant and work in the medical field. I have been coughed on and have full units of covid patients (unbeknownst to me until symptoms showed). The mask and vaccine have kept me safe. Never tested positive or had symptoms. My work was providing free parking bc if the pandemic which has now stopped. I couldn’t stomachs $20+ per day and I take public transportation now too, masked. I feel safe.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would be furious if my H was so concerned about not being “miserable” in traffic that he felt it was acceptable to risk the lives of my children every day.

Like “divorce-lawyer-consult-furious”, furious. That furious.

A vaccinated person riding the Metro in a proper mask is not risking the lives of his children every day.