DH is on the Trump train and it’s killing us!

[Anonymous]

I would pro-actively plan a getaway for just the two of you. Do something fun with no TV, little access to internet, etc. Maybe a trip to the National Parks in Utah? There's a ton of great hotels and lots of fun day trips - hiking, 4WD tours, horsebacking riding, river boat rides, etc.

No vacation to Florida with the other Trumpers - that sounds miserable.

[Anonymous]

I would have already divorced. But my exh voted for Trump and defends him because of his prolife values.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would definitely get a divorce.

This is never something I could take in my marriage. Seriously.

[Anonymous]

Op, use "agree to disagree"! Done~

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would pro-actively plan a getaway for just the two of you. Do something fun with no TV, little access to internet, etc. Maybe a trip to the National Parks in Utah? There's a ton of great hotels and lots of fun day trips - hiking, 4WD tours, horsebacking riding, river boat rides, etc.

No vacation to Florida with the other Trumpers - that sounds miserable.

Yeah, go somewhere off the grid without much of a signal and with lots of outdoor activities. Take some books. See if you can start the deprogramming process by cutting him off from the cult supply for a little while,

[Anonymous]

I have no problem with other factually/opinionated political views as long as some one can make a valid argument. But in this case, you need to realize that there are two things in this world that you will never be able to change in other people, crazy and stupid.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would pro-actively plan a getaway for just the two of you. Do something fun with no TV, little access to internet, etc. Maybe a trip to the National Parks in Utah? There's a ton of great hotels and lots of fun day trips - hiking, 4WD tours, horsebacking riding, river boat rides, etc.

No vacation to Florida with the other Trumpers - that sounds miserable.

I’m not sure I’m in the divorce camp. He has to make choices for himself. You have to make choices for yourself. Maybe time together can help you determine if there’s any hope.

Beyond that, PP’s question of “are your ready to live in his bubble?” This applies to your two kids (and any grandchildren)— who may stop visiting/seeing you due to intolerant beliefs. I know of a few friends who limited visits and then “just couldn’t find time” to visit family/parents who’d become intolerant.

Good luck!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why are there so many people that believe all the Trump crap? It can't be all Fox news brainwashing. How can anyone take that guy seriously?

Divorce

This. I just really, really, really don't get it. I don't want anymore newspaper articles about the yokels in the roadside diner. I want an article about my husband and in-laws, who were always conservative, but my BIL actually participated in one of those dumb car parades before the last election. He's in finance in NYC and is the furthest thing from stupid.

I get being conservative. I even get to some extent being aligned against Democrats in general, but neither of those things explain people's feelings about Trump. And spare me that they are all racist, misogynist A-holes and they always were. Trump resonates with some people in a way I simply can't fathom or explain.

[Anonymous]

I have 2 friends who are like this. One supports/supported Trump, but it's not in your face. If you don't bring up politics, he won't. He's a chill guy, and there are a million other topics to talk about (I'm a man also).

Another has always been a bit conspiracy-theory oriented, and Trump takes it to the next level. Our joke among other guy friends is how long into the conversation about something not political that he'll shift it into politics or start railing on how Biden is "destroying" the county (this is a Fox news talking point). We just have a good laugh and sometimes egg him on (hey, we're guys) like ask when he's taking his next vacation and will it be to Portland or Berkeley. That riles him up.

Even with the more crazy one, I think back and he's always been a good guy friends-wise. I'd say if you can make your life not about politics, and the rest is good, then keep it going. If not, then consider other options.

Don't try to argue about how his friends have left him -- that's just because they don't know "the truth" of course.

[Anonymous]

Political differences (Republican versus Democrat) are hard in a relationship, but Trumpism goes far beyond that and would definitely be a deal breaker for me.

[Anonymous]

Yeah, I’d be out too. 0P, what is his level of education?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yeah, I’d be out too. 0P, what is his level of education?

OP here. Just a 2 yr community college degree. I have just a high school education but I do have tremendous common sense! I recently saw the stats of people who got the COVID vaccine and it’s the uneducated blue collar workers who are less likely to get it. FYI my DH calls the vaccine the “death shot”! I got mine and I feel much more comfortable around my elderly mother now who is also vaccinated. He thinks all his friends are not getting the vaccine either but when I talk to their spouses they tell me the truth. His friends are lying to him. I find joy in giving him the news and seeing his reaction. He just shakes his head in dismay. It’s becoming a one man circus.

[Anonymous]

I view this as an untreated mental illness. Are you willing to stay someone who refuses treatment?

[Anonymous]

My DH and I had some political disagreements these past few years and I'll tell you, if he went even one more inch to the right during this Trump nightmare I think it would end us. I truly realized that it does matter and I can't be married to somebody who thinks certain things about humans and the world. I am not sure how you can be married to someone who is fundamentally ignorant and fearful.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yeah, I’d be out too. 0P, what is his level of education?

OP here. Just a 2 yr community college degree. I have just a high school education but I do have tremendous common sense! I recently saw the stats of people who got the COVID vaccine and it’s the uneducated blue collar workers who are less likely to get it. FYI my DH calls the vaccine the “death shot”! I got mine and I feel much more comfortable around my elderly mother now who is also vaccinated. He thinks all his friends are not getting the vaccine either but when I talk to their spouses they tell me the truth. His friends are lying to him. I find joy in giving him the news and seeing his reaction. He just shakes his head in dismay. It’s becoming a one man circus.

Can you stage an intervention?