anyone get into Aidan but not going?

[Anonymous]

AIdan mom here. First time responder, long time reader at DCUM.
Aidan is pretty structured and very orthodox in its adherence to Montessori principles. But it is not a cold heartless place! No way.
I am an outgoing, loving mother and find a lot of warmth at the school. I hug the teachers after PT conferences. Sure, there are some days my daughter says she wished they had toys and dress-ups at school. But, she gets those things at home. She is learning how to learn at Aidan. They encourage independence and curiosity. Kids are not learning to pass tests but because they WANT to learn; because they have been empowered to learn on their terms and at their pace.

I am always amazed how respectful and kind Aidan kids are. There is no real bullying or wild behavior but not because the kids are stifled military-style; rather, they seem to genuinely care about each other. Their manners are not bred from threats and rewards but organically (if that makes sense).

Sometimes I wish the Montessori philosophy was more chill. Sometimes I wish there was more silliness in class. But the kids experience a different kind of joy through learning and focus and discovery.

That said, I think all these schools are probably equally good. The differences between them are not going to make or break your kid's intellectual and social development! I really don't think the choice between NCRC and AIdan and Franklin and Friends, etc etc is that big a deal. For us the decision was partly a function of convenience (school is right near my work) and the fact that we only applied to one other place!

I guess all I am saying is that Aidan is wonderful. Maybe not perfect for everyone but neither is SIdwell, Harvard, NCRC, Oyster, etc etc. Your relationship with your kid's school is as complicated as any other relationship...

I just wanted to dismiss the over-simplified bad-mouthing of Aidan as a cold place that produces robotic kids! My kids are FAR FROM ROBOTS!!! Especially at clean up time....

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:16:58 - then what is the point of the Ms. A interview? Why is that only friends' children who reported that their sons/daughters listened to Ms. A and did exactly what he/she was told were told that the child was "ready for Montessori"?

It seems like you have a chip on your shoulder about her. Since this is a thread about families and kids admitted to Aidan and who are on the waitlist, I don't think it makes much sense nor is it appropriate to debate further why the interview process is what it is. If you are really interested in getting an answer, however, I would suggest that you get in touch with Ms. Antonucci, or with the AD after the admissions season slows down, and ask them. They are both very friendly women.

For people who are seriously considering Aidan, all I will say is that my family, and many other families, love the school, as do our kids. Kids at Aidan are not expected to be robotic drones and simply do what they are told. They have tons of ability to direct their work and do what interests them. As for following their interests and being free to express themselves? That's one of the things that Montessori and Aidan in particular is all about! How great is it that 3, 4 and 5 year old kids have the ability to work on a single lesson for 2-3 hours straight if that's what they want to do? And how great is it that the work is so interesting that it engages them to want to and be able to do that in the first place? A kid can paint all morning if he or she wants to. Is that "being compliant?" After you've ever seen a couple kids working together on a thousand chain all morning in the hallway, tell me if you think they are being compliant drones, or rather whether they are enjoying and being engaged by the work.

Good luck to everyone making a decision regarding Aidan, or who is on the waitlist hoping a spot opens up.

Not the PP you quoted, but I echo his/her comments. We were asked during our interview whether DD was always "this even-tempered," and we of course answered honestly (that, like any other child, she has her moments of frustration). She focused in on that and kept asking questions of what her "temper tantrums" look like - excuse me?? She even gave examples, "does she kick her feet?," "does she yell?," etc. And our friends who were asked the same question of their daughter chose the wise course and said "of course she's always this even tempered." And A appparently looked very pleased and did not question them, or their ridiculous answer, further.

[Anonymous]

PP here again - fyi, our DD did not get into Aidan, and our friends' DD did (and other than that one question, our DDs did pretty much the same in the interview). I'm not knocking the school - I'm a fan and that's why we applied (after much research). But the PPs do have a point about what A is looking for. Let's just be honest about that.

[Anonymous]

PP, I guess the question is why you are using this message thread to continue to vent about Aidan's interview process. This thread was started to talk about kids who were admitted or waitlisted at Aidan. I'm sorry that your DD was not accepted, especially since you are a fan of the school.

But whatever you may or may not believe the school is looking for through the interview process is really not relevant to what the experience would be like for kids who attend Aidan, once they are accepted. From that standpoint, as a current parent, let me reemphasize the prior posts that the school does not expect all of the kids to be even-tempered all the time. And the kids are not "robotic drones."

Good luck to all those accepted or waiting on the waitlist for a spot to open up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
Not the PP you quoted, but I echo his/her comments. We were asked during our interview whether DD was always "this even-tempered," and we of course answered honestly (that, like any other child, she has her moments of frustration). She focused in on that and kept asking questions of what her "temper tantrums" look like - excuse me?? She even gave examples, "does she kick her feet?," "does she yell?," etc. And our friends who were asked the same question of their daughter chose the wise course and said "of course she's always this even tempered." And A appparently looked very pleased and did not question them, or their ridiculous answer, further.

It is amazing to me how much fear and projection the admissions process at Aidan provokes. And that's what it is, projection and fear.

Yes, Ms. Antonucci is actively assessing a child on a variety of dimensions, and, yes, she does firmly discourage parental involvement in the process, since she has a short period of time to form a relationship with the child. But that's all that's happening. She is looking to see how a child is able to engage with a teacher in the Montessori style (which is more calm and serious on the whole than smiling and encouraging - since a child is thought to learn self-encouragement via achievement), how a child follows direction, how a child responds to frustration, how a child reacts to correction, degree of short and longer term working memory, fund of knowledge, fine motor, gross motor, etc. And there are no "right" or "wrong" answers to any particular part of the assessment - it's about looking at the whole child and developing a sense of who they are, their intelligence, and a variety of innate temperament qualities. No small task in 30 minutes.

Ms. Antonucci has been widely criticized on this board for lacking warmth - and now she is being criticized for "apparently looking very pleased" because parents lied and claimed their child was always even tempered. Goodness gracious, *that's* projection. The disturbing part of that quote is the fact that parents would lie to try to get their child into a school environment where (the parents fear) that child might not be a good fit if they tell the truth.

Fwiw, we told Ms. Antonucci the truth about our child's capacity for tantrums - since capacity for self-soothing is an important part of any assessment. And she got in anyway.

Good luck to all of those on the wait list - it's an amazing school with extremely talented teachers.