Your favorite body positive blogs/books/instagram/etc.

[Anonymous]

I am fat now at 48 - 5'6" and 235 (down from 245). For my 20s and most of 30s I wasn't - fluctuated b/s 145-155 and was moderately- very active (lived in NYC, walked everywhere, did outdoor bootcamps, etc.). I had gained a lot of weight in high school (up to about 210), and then lost it in first years of college. I gained weight in the last decade for a variety of typical reasons: office jobs, 2 children, unhappiness, depression. Food and drink were my only joys in a marriage I didn't want to be in.

I am trying to embrace both self-acceptance AND losing weight. I loved being more active. I feel like sh*t when I eat and drink too much. I hate not being able to easily get up off the floor. My knees ache. I waddle. I am afraid of breaking chairs. I want to go on swings with my kids and fit in kayaks easily. And, yes, I miss seeing my cheekbones and waist and there are some favorite clothes I'd like to wear again.

For me, weight loss is empowering. The idea that I AM my body is not or that being fat is WHO I am. Or that weight loss is impossible - how depressing. My body may have fat, but it doesn't need to define me. This body is also a result of a lifestyle which I am changing and do not want to live any longer. And certainly don't want to be my vehicle for my 50s and beyond.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am fat now at 48 - 5'6" and 235 (down from 245). For my 20s and most of 30s I wasn't - fluctuated b/s 145-155 and was moderately- very active (lived in NYC, walked everywhere, did outdoor bootcamps, etc.). I had gained a lot of weight in high school (up to about 210), and then lost it in first years of college. I gained weight in the last decade for a variety of typical reasons: office jobs, 2 children, unhappiness, depression. Food and drink were my only joys in a marriage I didn't want to be in.

I am trying to embrace both self-acceptance AND losing weight. I loved being more active. I feel like sh*t when I eat and drink too much. I hate not being able to easily get up off the floor. My knees ache. I waddle. I am afraid of breaking chairs. I want to go on swings with my kids and fit in kayaks easily. And, yes, I miss seeing my cheekbones and waist and there are some favorite clothes I'd like to wear again.

For me, weight loss is empowering. The idea that I AM my body is not or that being fat is WHO I am. Or that weight loss is impossible - how depressing. My body may have fat, but it doesn't need to define me. This body is also a result of a lifestyle which I am changing and do not want to live any longer. And certainly don't want to be my vehicle for my 50s and beyond.

I think your story is honest and full of hope. Many of the body positivity bloggers want to keep their readers fat because it sells. Keep them in a physical and mental prison by telling them “Rock that FUPA,” or “cankles are sexy” (actual quotes from these blogs). No matter that losing weight on your own terms is empowering. Why assume someone wants to lose weight for the “patriarchy”? Women can’t better themselves for their own reasons?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am fat now at 48 - 5'6" and 235 (down from 245). For my 20s and most of 30s I wasn't - fluctuated b/s 145-155 and was moderately- very active (lived in NYC, walked everywhere, did outdoor bootcamps, etc.). I had gained a lot of weight in high school (up to about 210), and then lost it in first years of college. I gained weight in the last decade for a variety of typical reasons: office jobs, 2 children, unhappiness, depression. Food and drink were my only joys in a marriage I didn't want to be in.

I am trying to embrace both self-acceptance AND losing weight. I loved being more active. I feel like sh*t when I eat and drink too much. I hate not being able to easily get up off the floor. My knees ache. I waddle. I am afraid of breaking chairs. I want to go on swings with my kids and fit in kayaks easily. And, yes, I miss seeing my cheekbones and waist and there are some favorite clothes I'd like to wear again.

For me, weight loss is empowering. The idea that I AM my body is not or that being fat is WHO I am. Or that weight loss is impossible - how depressing. My body may have fat, but it doesn't need to define me. This body is also a result of a lifestyle which I am changing and do not want to live any longer. And certainly don't want to be my vehicle for my 50s and beyond.

I think your story is honest and full of hope. Many of the body positivity bloggers want to keep their readers fat because it sells. Keep them in a physical and mental prison by telling them “Rock that FUPA,” or “cankles are sexy” (actual quotes from these blogs). No matter that losing weight on your own terms is empowering. Why assume someone wants to lose weight for the “patriarchy”? Women can’t better themselves for their own reasons?

Thank you! Another message I hear from "anti-dieters" (and don't get me wrong - I know that "diets" that aren't true lifestyle changes really aren't sustainable) is that the diet industry makes billions of dollars from women who hate their bodies so don't believe in diets - but this omits some crucial points: the processed food and drink and alcohol and restaurant and marketing industries make many times over that by pushing food and alcohol and calories on us. Also, the diet industry sells us "hope" but actually makes more money if we yo-yo - because then we are lifetime clients, right? So maybe weight watchers is set up so you need it for life.

[Anonymous]

That's ridiculous and absolutely absurd PP. "More than a body" as an idea is NOT saying you have to stay fat to challenge patriarchy. It's saying that women are valuable for things OTHER THAN their body. YOU CLEARLY DO NOT GET THAT. Don't twist it by diverting to health considerations. Of course men and women both should be concerned about health. That is not what is going on here. Women spend FAR MORE time and head space worrying about their APPEARANCE.

And you are trying to defend your policing by making it seems virtuous. What I suspect is a key part of your identity is wrapped up in your body's APPEARANCE and you get a thrill by judging others in comparison. That is a sign of a broken character and culture.

The way you speak about these bloggers reveals the repulsive core of your character. It is ugly. Look within.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:That's ridiculous and absolutely absurd PP. "More than a body" as an idea is NOT saying you have to stay fat to challenge patriarchy. It's saying that women are valuable for things OTHER THAN their body. YOU CLEARLY DO NOT GET THAT. Don't twist it by diverting to health considerations. Of course men and women both should be concerned about health. That is not what is going on here. Women spend FAR MORE time and head space worrying about their APPEARANCE.

And you are trying to defend your policing by making it seems virtuous. What I suspect is a key part of your identity is wrapped up in your body's APPEARANCE and you get a thrill by judging others in comparison. That is a sign of a broken character and culture.

The way you speak about these bloggers reveals the repulsive core of your character. It is ugly. Look within.

Which PP are you responding to?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:A fat person who can dance is not necessarily healthy.

For example:

https://twitter.com/movieman_1970/status/1165778135494709248?s=21

I don’t think any doctor would consider him to be healthy. RIP. The “psychiatrist” is proponent of advocating for “obesity is healthy” by calling it “body positivity”. Shocking if she is truly a medical provider. Possibly she’s the fat dancer and she’s just promoting her blog....

OP here.
I am a psychiatrist. I live in the city now and send my patients with eating disorders to an eating disorders clinic, so I don’t deal with this anymore. However, I was surprised when I started reading that there was really a lot of similarity between the change in mindset needed to gain weight with anorexia and to lose weight with obesity. And a lot of it has to do with accepting and loving your body, as well as finding other ways to manage difficult emotions outside of eating or restricting caloric intake.

This insistence that people hate themselves and their bodies isn’t helpful for anyone, fat or thin.

[Anonymous]

The wholesome fig on Instagram.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A fat person who can dance is not necessarily healthy.

For example:

https://twitter.com/movieman_1970/status/1165778135494709248?s=21

I don’t think any doctor would consider him to be healthy. RIP. The “psychiatrist” is proponent of advocating for “obesity is healthy” by calling it “body positivity”. Shocking if she is truly a medical provider. Possibly she’s the fat dancer and she’s just promoting her blog....

OP here.
I am a psychiatrist. I live in the city now and send my patients with eating disorders to an eating disorders clinic, so I don’t deal with this anymore. However, I was surprised when I started reading that there was really a lot of similarity between the change in mindset needed to gain weight with anorexia and to lose weight with obesity. And a lot of it has to do with accepting and loving your body, as well as finding other ways to manage difficult emotions outside of eating or restricting caloric intake.

This insistence that people hate themselves and their bodies isn’t helpful for anyone, fat or thin.

So, as a doctor, when you see anorexics/eating disorder patients, you send them to a specialized eating disorders clinic?

But, when you see morbidly obese patients, you refer them to body positivity blogs, websites, instagram accounts? So they can feel better about themselves? At what point does a morbidly obese patient receive medical intervention? Surely there is a point where “acceptance” needs to stop and intervention begins.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A fat person who can dance is not necessarily healthy.

For example:

https://twitter.com/movieman_1970/status/1165778135494709248?s=21

I don’t think any doctor would consider him to be healthy. RIP. The “psychiatrist” is proponent of advocating for “obesity is healthy” by calling it “body positivity”. Shocking if she is truly a medical provider. Possibly she’s the fat dancer and she’s just promoting her blog....

OP here.
I am a psychiatrist. I live in the city now and send my patients with eating disorders to an eating disorders clinic, so I don’t deal with this anymore. However, I was surprised when I started reading that there was really a lot of similarity between the change in mindset needed to gain weight with anorexia and to lose weight with obesity. And a lot of it has to do with accepting and loving your body, as well as finding other ways to manage difficult emotions outside of eating or restricting caloric intake.

This insistence that people hate themselves and their bodies isn’t helpful for anyone, fat or thin.

So, as a doctor, when you see anorexics/eating disorder patients, you send them to a specialized eating disorders clinic?

But, when you see morbidly obese patients, you refer them to body positivity blogs, websites, instagram accounts? So they can feel better about themselves? At what point does a morbidly obese patient receive medical intervention? Surely there is a point where “acceptance” needs to stop and intervention begins.

+1. This is a valid point. If medical professionals don’t treat fat people who are at risk of serious health problems, it seems they are the ones who are actually discriminating against overweight people.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A fat person who can dance is not necessarily healthy.

For example:

https://twitter.com/movieman_1970/status/1165778135494709248?s=21

I don’t think any doctor would consider him to be healthy. RIP. The “psychiatrist” is proponent of advocating for “obesity is healthy” by calling it “body positivity”. Shocking if she is truly a medical provider. Possibly she’s the fat dancer and she’s just promoting her blog....

OP here.
I am a psychiatrist. I live in the city now and send my patients with eating disorders to an eating disorders clinic, so I don’t deal with this anymore. However, I was surprised when I started reading that there was really a lot of similarity between the change in mindset needed to gain weight with anorexia and to lose weight with obesity. And a lot of it has to do with accepting and loving your body, as well as finding other ways to manage difficult emotions outside of eating or restricting caloric intake.

This insistence that people hate themselves and their bodies isn’t helpful for anyone, fat or thin.

So, as a doctor, when you see anorexics/eating disorder patients, you send them to a specialized eating disorders clinic?

But, when you see morbidly obese patients, you refer them to body positivity blogs, websites, instagram accounts? So they can feel better about themselves? At what point does a morbidly obese patient receive medical intervention? Surely there is a point where “acceptance” needs to stop and intervention begins.

No.
That is not what I said. Do you really think I would give a morbidly obese person a book about a young woman’s battle with anorexia as treatment?
When I was living in a small town and seeing anorexic patients, I also referred them to body positivity blogs, including a book that I bought off of one of them, which I shared with the nutritionist I was working with. I was completely in over my head, and these young people were dying, but they refused to go anywhere else. I read a lot, and obviously where there were medical interventions to be made, I made them. However, most of the work needed to be done on people’s thinking, and I needed to know how people were thinking, and how others got past it. I found these blogs and books particularly interesting at the time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:https://www.morethanabody.org/

Good for many women to read. Internalized patriarchy wastes lives.

Thanks, just put a hold on it at my library.