Kids' teachers won't leave me alone!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Work with your kids. Why are they needing so much support at this point? If they are misplacing materials, help them organize themselves each night as homework. Are they having trouble turning things in? Make sure they know that you will help after work. Reward them for being independent. They can get a special reward if they do not bother you all day.

Teachers are not reaching out unless there are large problems. If they are constantly reaching out- you have an issue that needs to be solved. You might also consider a parent- teacher conference to discuss how to make your children more independent.

You can’t ignore young children, but you can help them gain the skills they need to fend for themselves for a few hours.

\

Not true, not even close. Some teachers are relying on parents to do their jobs for them.

[Anonymous]

I have 3 dc in elementary and I am hearing from teachers about all kinds of petty sutff

[Anonymous]

Get a mother's helper to assist for a couple of hours/day.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Get a mother's helper to assist for a couple of hours/day.

This.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Work with your kids. Why are they needing so much support at this point? If they are misplacing materials, help them organize themselves each night as homework. Are they having trouble turning things in? Make sure they know that you will help after work. Reward them for being independent. They can get a special reward if they do not bother you all day.

Teachers are not reaching out unless there are large problems. If they are constantly reaching out- you have an issue that needs to be solved. You might also consider a parent- teacher conference to discuss how to make your children more independent.

You can’t ignore young children, but you can help them gain the skills they need to fend for themselves for a few hours.

\

Not true, not even close. Some teachers are relying on parents to do their jobs for them.

Can a teacher get your child a pillow to sit on so that your child’s face is level with the computer screen?

Can the teacher get the assigned book from your child’s bedroom and bring it to the kitchen where you established a workspace for your child?

Can the teacher take the toy out of your child’s hands so they stop playing with it and do the assignment instead?

Wow, teachers are magical!

[Anonymous]

YOU need to have all of the supplies that your children need in an easily accessible place so that your children can be more self-sufficient. The teachers are not in your home and your children are not handling this well themselves. If you took some time to prepare, like teachers do in their classrooms, then your children and their teachers wouldn't need to 'bother' you so often. Even something as simple as being able to see your child's face to better TEACH your child is reasonable - for example, if your child isn't speaking clearly or loud enough, teachers can read body language and lips to see if s/he is understanding the material. How on earth do you expect them to fix some of these problems from a distance?!

[Anonymous]

At our school, parents were allowed to send students 5 days.
If they chose distance learning they had to promise to help out.

I have a kid who loses materials constantly, and can't do some basic computer things, like if a password doesn't work the first time "ZOOM IS BROKEN" and gives up for the day.

What we did as a staff was make a running document for the barriers, and then talked to the family about it at one time, in a little "chart" with a list of suggestions (keep passwords on a post-it note by the computer, use a standard background, assemble materials for the day the night before so students aren't hoping out of the chair...

however it is NOT cool for you to be treated as your child's lady in waiting/butler.

When I have too many suggestions, I sometimes put them all in one place to make a checklist. If you did this and then showed the teacher how many requests came in over the course of the day.

[Anonymous]

It’s pretty unusual for teachers to be getting in contact this often. It makes me wonder if there are significant technology issues that the teachers are perceiving as a barrier to learning. As an example, I teach children who will sit like bumps on a log and then tell me 20 minutes later that they couldn’t hear anything over Zoom, which I later discover is due to low bandwidth. Sometimes we teachers take digital literacy for granted too: I’ve asked children to “click on a link” only to find out a fifth grader doesn’t know that underlined blue text is a link. I know that digital learning at home can feel chaotic for working parents, so I never want to make assumptions or place blame. One strategy for doing that, particularly for those of us who have been berated by more “reactive” parents, is to share observations as objectively as possible and in a timely way. OP, time to figure out if all of the short messages are possibly pointing to a bigger message your child’s teacher is trying to get across.

[Anonymous]

Why are you responding to the emails?

I’m a SAHM and I set up my kids in the morning. I don’t do any of what you describe and I bet most parents don’t either.
My kids are in elementary. None of this matters. If their teacher wants them to have specific supplies fir an art project or whatever, they can email me the day before and I’ll make sure it’s set up. If they don’t let me know the night before, I’m not going to run around to try to find random supplies in the middle of the day. You’re doing this to yourself.

Your kids should know not to bother you while you’re working.

You’re doing this to yourself. Only you can make it stop.

[Anonymous]

I think you need to do a couple of things.

(1) Set up a specific place where all school materials are always kept in some organized fashion. Include basic school supplies -- pencils, composition books, scissors, glue sticks, construction paper, white board, etc.
(2) The night before or in the morning, look at the schedule and make sure that the materials for each class are ready to hand. Older kids can help with this.
(3) Check the chair/desk setup to make sure that your kid's face is clearly visible on video. Adjust chair/desk height or get a booster or whatever so that the setup is correct.
(4) Check their tech setup in general -- volume, working headphones, etc. Remind them not to mess with the settings.
(5) Defer responding to all emails about homework/assignments. They might just be emailing you about missing work when they have a minute between classes; that doesn't mean you need to handle it that moment.
(6) Ignore all emails that are not actually urgent. Check them at lunch and the end of the day. If you ignore them, they don't disrupt your day.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Hi, OP, I'm a teacher and I'm really sorry that you are having to deal with all these emails.

I really think we teachers need to not bother parents as much as possible now. In the first few weeks maybe parents were needed because the technology was all so new, but at this point we should just stick to activities that our kids can accomplish independently -- even if that means less variety or less interesting work for the kids.

Asking parents to upload student work is no good. Kids need some way of turning in their work without requiring parent help.

You have a valid reason to contact the principal and ask that this be made a priority.

NP, and thank you for your perspective, and all the hard work you do.

Part of the problem with teachers sticking to activities that young kids can do independently is that there are SO many parents who *are* willing to hover over their kids and do every little thing that’s needed for them, i.e., to function as a teacher’s aide and their kid’s personal assistant. And those parents complain out the wazoo if things are too “easy,” failing to realize that not every parent can provide that much assistance for their kids, if they even want to. I mean, even if it’s not email, I have so often overheard my kids’ teachers say “okay, ask your parent to...” while I’m on a call or in the middle of work or whatever. No. We can’t just drop everything and pretending that we can because we’re parents is absurd.

IME, this thread demonstrates much of why remote learning doesn’t work for elementary school kids in particular.

[Anonymous]

As others have said, stop checking email while you're working. Just like if the kids were in school, if there is a genuine emergency, someone will call you or call the emergency contact. Other than that, it can wait. (And I can't even imagine what type of genuine emergency there could be in DL)


I also would, though, email the teacher for a general check-in, to see if there are any specific ongoing concerns, especially with the lack of materials. our teacher has a standing "materials you need" list, and she def gets annoyed when kids don't have that stuff ready to go. There may be something like that you're missing.

[Anonymous]

Yes, pp. Exactly. In a regular classroom, the teacher would help DC get a seat, find their work, stay focused, etc. Some of the biggest tools we use to keep young children focused are movement and proximity. Those have been ripped away by DL.

OP, that sounds very challenging. I would tell the teachers that you can check email at noon and five. Then set up a filter so all of their emails go into a folder. Your kids will learn less, but if you are able to work remotely, you likely have the resources to catch them up this summer. It’s more important to protect your job.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have a 4 and 8 yo who are nowhere near self sufficient at DL, so I’m not surprised you’re constantly being interrupted. I empathize, but I think your younger two are probably too young to be expected to navigate the day on their own. Is there another parent in the house that can share DL duty, or can you hire a part time sitter?

Precisely. I'm not sure you can ask a 5-year-old to be self-sufficient all day long. If this is becoming too much of a burden and affecting your work, you may have to put them in daycare.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Hi, OP, I'm a teacher and I'm really sorry that you are having to deal with all these emails.

I really think we teachers need to not bother parents as much as possible now. In the first few weeks maybe parents were needed because the technology was all so new, but at this point we should just stick to activities that our kids can accomplish independently -- even if that means less variety or less interesting work for the kids.

Asking parents to upload student work is no good. Kids need some way of turning in their work without requiring parent help.

You have a valid reason to contact the principal and ask that this be made a priority.

NP, and thank you for your perspective, and all the hard work you do.

Part of the problem with teachers sticking to activities that young kids can do independently is that there are SO many parents who *are* willing to hover over their kids and do every little thing that’s needed for them, i.e., to function as a teacher’s aide and their kid’s personal assistant. And those parents complain out the wazoo if things are too “easy,” failing to realize that not every parent can provide that much assistance for their kids, if they even want to. I mean, even if it’s not email, I have so often overheard my kids’ teachers say “okay, ask your parent to...” while I’m on a call or in the middle of work or whatever. No. We can’t just drop everything and pretending that we can because we’re parents is absurd.

IME, this thread demonstrates much of why remote learning doesn’t work for elementary school kids in particular.

Honestly, it could just be this teacher. I teach elementary and have never once emailed a parent during the day to help their student with something online.