Any parents out there who are CHOOSING not to send their kids to private schools? Why ...??

[Anonymous]

Is this like choosing between First Class and Coach on an airplane? You pay to get treated better but everyone gets to the same same place at the same time. Or do the private school students often arrive at a better destination (as measured by reasoning ability/ability to get things done/college placements)? Does anyone have a compelling answer to this question?

[Anonymous]

We send our kids to private school - but we do not have an overarching exmission agenda. We know that they will most likely be admitted to the same colleges as their public school peers. And we believe that academically, many kids in most public schools do fine. We send them to private because we feel that is the best environment for them now, and that they are receiving a quality education, excellent enrichment opportunities, and individualized attention. They are safe, nurtured, and cherished. I simply don't agree that college placement is the only endpoint, or the only criteria on which to base decisions about your child's education.

[Anonymous]

I trust that their are other sane, ordinary, normal parents out there who are also smart and talented!

Yes, THERE are. And, like me, they may be sending THEIR kids to private school for many reasons that should not matter to you. The decision is a very personal one. Why do you care if other parents choose to send THEIR kids to private school?

[Anonymous]

Just to respond to the PPs who scoffed at the prospect of kids/parents experiencing diversity in Chevy Chase - don't be so sure. For example, according to the Montgomery County schools website, BCC is approximately 2/3 white, with significant representation by African-American, Hispanic and Asian kids. Whitman is a little less diverse, but hardly all white. We live in the BCC school district and our neighborhood in the gentrifying part of CC is very diverse by any standard - race, culture, orientation, etc. Chevy Chase has a deservedly snooty rep but there are lots of houses that have not yet been turned into McMansions with families like us who moved here explicitly for the schools.

But to answer the OP's query we've thought about private schools too but will almost certainly end up at public. I guess everyone wants the best for their kids, and I know that my more academic husband was really impressed with the syllabi & facilities at some of the fancy places. He also sees it as a way to give our kid a leg up when it comes to college or beyond. For my part I grew up in a lovely but unexceptional public school but then ended up in the Ivy League, so I'm less neurotic even though that's probably an obsolete, irrelevant model. Anyway, whenever I feel myself getting sucked into the anxieties about getting the kid into the right "feeder" playgroup (?!?!?!) I just remember what my parents used to say - everyone spends their money differently; you have to do what's right for you and your family.

[Anonymous]

To PP 16:01... BRAVO!!!! You took the words right out of my mouth!

"We send them to private because we feel that is the best environment for them now, and that they are receiving a quality education, excellent enrichment opportunities, and individualized attention. They are safe, nurtured, and cherished. I simply don't agree that college placement is the only endpoint, or the only criteria on which to base decisions about your child's education."

LOVE it! Just LOVE it!

My only REAL end-goal for my children is health, happinesss, and a wonderful life. In the meantime, I want them to be in an environment that provides those things right now in accordance with my and my husband's personal standards. Our children's private school is doing exactly that and we are incredibly happy as are they. The school is just right for them and just right for us.

[Anonymous]

We bought our house in the Waynewood school district-but have thought twice about our son going there. It's not the school, Waynewood Elementary is a FANTASTIC grade school-a number 10 in Fairfax Co. We changed our minds because of the "no child left behind". Don't get me wrong-it's a great concept-but now the focus is on children who aren't excelling and testing. We've decided to go the Montessori path-not because it's private-because we like the style of teaching our son will have. My husband can't stand the thought of paying taxes to a wonderful grade school, and then paying for a Montessori-but he and I are on the same page. I still believe that it's the parent's responsiblity for their child's education, not the schools. They only have so many resources.

[Anonymous]

I'm not sure how a thread about people choosing not to send their kids to private schools turned into a thread about people choosing to send their kids to private schools, but whatever

We are choosing to send our kids to public schools. Main reason being financial. We make a pretty good living, but not a living that would allow us to easily send our 2 DDs to a private school from k-12. Plus, we live in MoCo and our public schools are pretty gosh darn good.

My husband (who has a PH.D.) and I (I have a Master's) do value education, but I don't think either one of us wants to make the sacrifices necessary to send both our kids to private.

Sure, we could move further away from where we live now and live in an apartment or tiny run-down house in order to spend the $40k (we have two kids) a year on tuition. But I like living closer to a metro. I like the fact that I will be moving to a slightly bigger house soon with a full basement that I plan to convert into an incredible playroom for my children. A playroom filled with lots of interesting and educationally appropriate toys.

Sure, we could have me go back to work to help afford the tuition. But I like being a SAHM and being able to take the kids on fun field trips throughout the region. If sending the kids to a public school means I can stay-at-home or only have a part time job even longer then that is fine. I would like to be home when my kids come home from school. I would like to have the time to help with their homework. I would like to drive them to their afterschool activities.

Or we could do those things and skip all vacations. But to us, traveling can be very educational. Going to an European city for a week in the summer as vacation? How great would that be for our children's education! I would love to take my daughters back to Paris to see the Louvre, Versailles when they are older. And I shouldn't forget Rome and London! Plus all the wonderful sites in this country.

And I shouldn't forget to add that we want to fund their college (and hopefully graduate school!) years. Starting adulthood without college debt is very important to us. We don't want to saddle our daughters with tons and tons of debt when they are 22 or 25. I don't think we could fully fund the college/grad school and pay the tuition.

Who knows - if we had tons and tons of money and I didn't have to make the sacrifices I listed above I might be inclined to go private.

But given what we make and the sacrifices that would be needed to send our kids to private, I just don't think it's worth it. But then I believe the education one receives in the home/outside world is also important. And by sending my children to public, we will be able to provide them a more enriching home/outside world education.

[Anonymous]

I'm choosing public. Why pay for something that you can get for free? Education is so much more than school. Our children are smart, have many friends, travel, pursue hobbies and are learning a whole lot ouside of school. We could afford private school with some sacrifices, but much prefer to spend that money on trips, camps, and other activities that my kids enjoy. They have taken cooking classes, travelled extensively, attended science and math camp, etc. Works for us.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm choosing public. Why pay for something that you can get for free? Education is so much more than school. Our children are smart, have many friends, travel, pursue hobbies and are learning a whole lot ouside of school. We could afford private school with some sacrifices, but much prefer to spend that money on trips, camps, and other activities that my kids enjoy. They have taken cooking classes, travelled extensively, attended science and math camp, etc. Works for us.

PP here-wanted to add that even if we had a ton of money, I wouldn't send them to private. Don't have the time to deal with the application process, which I had no idea was so intense until I looked at this forum, and there are no guarantees that a child will do well. Plus, we have many successes in our families and we all attended what would be considered "low tier" public schools. Our parents valued education and therefore we made the best of our situations (we really didn't know better anyway) and we grew up wanting to succeed.

[Anonymous]

I don't want to have to mingle with private school parents who most likely will not have a thing in common with my family. I don't want to go through the antics of impressing a school that I am already paying big bucks to on why my 3 year old belongs there. My family can think of a lot of other things I can do with 25K a year. I know a lot of successful people that went to lowly public schools. But the clincher was....I asked my daughter if she would like to go to private school, and she said "No".

[Anonymous]

Well, I'm surprised no one has mentioned class size or teacher-student ratio as at least a couple of factors to be thought about when chosing between public and private schools. One of the previous posts rightly pointed out, that public schools are obliged to teach to the test for funding reasons and some important areas such as the arts are cut out. I don't know if the instruction is any better in private schools compared to public schools but to some extent you are getting a different product.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It must be nice to be perfect like you and live in an ideal world.

The rest of us are just flawed parents trying to access the best resources we can for our children in an environment where demand dramatically outstrips supply.

I am my child's best resource. I will teach him things no other school can. A private school education is not a guarantee that your child will do well later in life. The same can be said about public schools. It is obvious that with certain private school names attached to your child, more doors may open. But, that doesn't mean that they prepare your child any better (or worse) than other schools. You are buying an exclusive brand. It makes some people feel better.

[Anonymous]

I'm new to this board and I decided that there is no way in hell I am going to go through the hassles and stress just to get my kid into private school. I have been sucked into reading all these posts and I laugh to myself--are you people for real? This is better than American Idol!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't want to have to mingle with private school parents who most likely will not have a thing in common with my family. I don't want to go through the antics of impressing a school that I am already paying big bucks to on why my 3 year old belongs there. My family can think of a lot of other things I can do with 25K a year. I know a lot of successful people that went to lowly public schools. But the clincher was....I asked my daughter if she would like to go to private school, and she said "No".

That would be your 3 year old daughter?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't want to have to mingle with private school parents who most likely will not have a thing in common with my family. I don't want to go through the antics of impressing a school that I am already paying big bucks to on why my 3 year old belongs there. My family can think of a lot of other things I can do with 25K a year. I know a lot of successful people that went to lowly public schools. But the clincher was....I asked my daughter if she would like to go to private school, and she said "No".

That would be your 3 year old daughter?

Why did you write "lowly public schools"?