When did you stop packing your DC school lunch?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I was sort of mom shamed for still packing my 9yo lunch every morning. She is capable and has and would do it if I asked, but it’s something I just do. Honestly, it’s quicker and easier if I do it, so I just do it. How about you?

The person who needs to stop is the mom shame.

I think that kids need a combination of opportunities to develop independence, and opportunities to learn how people care for one another. So, choosing some things that each child does for themselves, and some things where they experience having someone do it for them or they do something for other people, is a good balance. Which thing goes in which category doesn't really matter, as long as there is a balance, so do what works for your routine.

In my particular house, my kids were about 7 or 8 when they started packing their lunches. But I'm also a parent who set out a snack for after school every day, because at that point in the day my kids were ready for a little nurturing and reconnection. My SIL, who is a fantastic mom, packed her kids lunch every day through high school graduation. She often left for work before her daughter was up, and she liked having that tangible way of caregiving. But her daughter was independent on other things that my kids aren't at the same age. It's all fine. It sounds like what you have works for you.

This is very well said. My kids are 9 and 12. I pack their lunch for a number of reasons. One of the main reasons is that they really like it. I relinquish other responsibilities, like doing their laundry, making breakfast, cleaning their rooms.

I remember complaining as a second grader that my mom packed too much food. She immediately stopped packing my lunch. When my kids complain or don't eat all of their lunch for one reason or another, I remind that they should be more vocal about what they want, be grateful, or stop complaining. If they didn't eat what I packed because they were goofing off during lunch, they know that I will pack less food the next day to remind them that eating is the priority for lunch. It might seem cruel, but my kids aren't starving and I don't like throwing out food because it sat out all day and wasn't eaten.