Did you parents loose interest in their grandchildren once they became tweens & teens

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:ILs who live away from us have called my DH maybe 8 times or so since pandemic (March). They have no real interaction with my DS. No interest. Their phone calls are full of what their daughter and granddaughter are doing. My parents have never favored a grandchild. Hard to watch. DS doesn't notice or comment. It makes me mad if I think about it, but I try not to. The one good thing about this pandemic is no visits from them hopefully for many more months.

You seem to be looking to be offended. I have a sister - my calls with our parents are all about her and her kids, her calls with our parents are all about me and my kids. I think our parents just don't have much else to share, life is boring right now, but they love the stories about both of our kids and thats what they enjoy sharing.

They have called me zero times during the pandemic. ZERO! Their reason for it is that i'm busy with work and kids and so its easier for me to call them when i'm free than for them to call me and stress me out. not perfect logici but its also not malicious.

I bet if your husband called his parents more and shared more details about the kids, your inlaws would be relaying all these stories to his sister.

[Anonymous]

My parents are still very much interested in hanging with my teens. They love it. But what I find a challenge is making sure my teens hang with their grandparents. The teens schedules are busy with friends, sports etc so they find it hard to find time with the grandparents. I totally get it, but I do push them to see their grandparents because I don't want my parents to feel sad about it. And I also think it's good for teens to have solid relationships with grandparents.

[Anonymous]

I think grandparents who tend toward the controlling, judgemental end of the spectrum probably like people less once they mature enough to disagree and have their own opinions.
I definitely see this with my MIL. She enjoyed dressing my children up and taking them places that she decided on, etc. Much less interested now that they are more independent people with their own wants and desires and opinions and outlook on the world.

[Anonymous]

My dad didn't get interested until my kid was a tween.

[Anonymous]

Mine are actually more interested in my kids as they get older. Neither of my parents knew what to do with little kids. It's a wonder they once raised three!

[Anonymous]

My dad was always interested in my kids, from the moment they were born. My mother not interested in the slightest, didn't even want to feel a kick when I was pregnant.

My dad is now dead and my mother isn't remotely interested in them still, nor my ILS. The only interest they show is for academic success so they can brag.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think grandparents who tend toward the controlling, judgemental end of the spectrum probably like people less once they mature enough to disagree and have their own opinions.
I definitely see this with my MIL. She enjoyed dressing my children up and taking them places that she decided on, etc. Much less interested now that they are more independent people with their own wants and desires and opinions and outlook on the world.

My parents are exactly like this and proud of it. It is pathetic but that's the way they are.

[Anonymous]

Nope. But, I am super close to my parents, and they have always been very involved and super close with all of my children, even as they age. Now, if you were to ask my sister, she would tell a different story, but they were not close to her or my niece, at all.

[Anonymous]

Maybe grandparents see something in your kids that they don't want to say or like. And it could be anything.

[Anonymous]

No.

My parents were very involved with their grandkids and they remain so. My ILs were never interested in grandkids and they remain so - with all their grandkids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Nope. But, I am super close to my parents, and they have always been very involved and super close with all of my children, even as they age. Now, if you were to ask my sister, she would tell a different story, but they were not close to her or my niece, at all.

Who not? Any particular reason you are the favorite? Does it bother you st all, or are you pleased as punch?

[Anonymous]

I find the teens are less interested in the grandparents. They're not interested in any adults, just their friends. Tough times right now for teens with the pandemic. Tough for everyone actually.

[Anonymous]

Realize the relationship is transitioning to an eventual relationship between adults.

It can't be all me-me-me. Teens must give as well as take.

Teens need to become interested in their Grandparents as people. Interested in their lives, know their hobbies. It's an adult relationship. Teens aren't capable of it yet, but it's a goal.

[Anonymous]

Normal. They don't relate to each other.

Who wouldn't rather hang out with a cute, cuddly toddler or preschooler than an awkward teen?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Normal. They don't relate to each other.

Who wouldn't rather hang out with a cute, cuddly toddler or preschooler than an awkward teen?

Yeah, I'd take the toddler or preschooler.