I think she’s fooling around

[Anonymous]

If it’s any consolation I am a wife who has been staying out late at friends’ places (still coming home, but like 3a) and I am not having an affair. It’s been a coping mechanism for covid + a lack of emotional connection from my DH for nearly a year. After bringing it up multiple times I gave up and have been seeking emotional connection with my friends group (distanced on patios).

How has your connection between one another been recently OP?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If it’s any consolation I am a wife who has been staying out late at friends’ places (still coming home, but like 3a) and I am not having an affair. It’s been a coping mechanism for covid + a lack of emotional connection from my DH for nearly a year. After bringing it up multiple times I gave up and have been seeking emotional connection with my friends group (distanced on patios).

How has your connection between one another been recently OP?

So you haven't cheated....yet

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If it’s any consolation I am a wife who has been staying out late at friends’ places (still coming home, but like 3a) and I am not having an affair. It’s been a coping mechanism for covid + a lack of emotional connection from my DH for nearly a year. After bringing it up multiple times I gave up and have been seeking emotional connection with my friends group (distanced on patios).

How has your connection between one another been recently OP?

So you haven't cheated....yet

Even if I wanted to cheat (I do not) there aren’t opportunities in these scenarios...? 5-6 friends sitting on a patio having platonic conversations about politics and tv and memes and life and the world. DH and I have sex, but he seems to want no part in the non-sex part of our relationship anymore so rather than chat endlessly with my kids about farts and video games, I’ve been leaning on my friends for emotional support and adult conversation. I’m an extrovert and we’re all starved for human connection so our nights fly by and turn late.

OP I think it’s best to have a talk with her and say you’re worried that she’s doing this frequently and when she’s late and doesn’t call you get concerned that something bad has happened to her.

[Anonymous]

DW does this several times. I trust her 100%.

DW has lots of her friends nearby and what is wrong with crashing at their place once in a while? It is a nice little break.

You need trust in a relationship. I cannot believe how suspicious you all are.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If it’s any consolation I am a wife who has been staying out late at friends’ places (still coming home, but like 3a) and I am not having an affair. It’s been a coping mechanism for covid + a lack of emotional connection from my DH for nearly a year. After bringing it up multiple times I gave up and have been seeking emotional connection with my friends group (distanced on patios).

How has your connection between one another been recently OP?

Are you texting and responding to your spouse during these nights out?

This is a bad sign in a marriage. I can’t imagine my spouse and I hanging out with friends without each other until 3am.

We always were out in groups, couples etc when we were out that late- never alone.

You need to work on your marriage pronto.

Get into therapy, communicate...it gets worse the longer you don’t address it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DW does this several times. I trust her 100%.

DW has lots of her friends nearby and what is wrong with crashing at their place once in a while? It is a nice little break.

You need trust in a relationship. I cannot believe how suspicious you all are.

This is the excuse my spouse’s AP used. Her friends were complicit/alibis. His was work trip.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ummm. She’s screwing some guy during a pandemic.

Not just STIs/STDs and pregnancy to worry about, also Covid.

And you are 100% sure it's a guy?

She could be screwing a woman. My $ is on a dude.

You don’t check in at all with a spouse if you are getting boned.

If this were a night out with girlfriends- she would send a text here or there. It’s telling she just disappears with zero contact.

When I'm out with girlfriends i don't text my DH here and there. I'm out with my girlfriends! If i needed a ride home is text or call, but otherwise, no.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ummm. She’s screwing some guy during a pandemic.

Not just STIs/STDs and pregnancy to worry about, also Covid.

And you are 100% sure it's a guy?

She could be screwing a woman. My $ is on a dude.

You don’t check in at all with a spouse if you are getting boned.

If this were a night out with girlfriends- she would send a text here or there. It’s telling she just disappears with zero contact.

When I'm out with girlfriends i don't text my DH here and there. I'm out with my girlfriends! If i needed a ride home is text or call, but otherwise, no.

Yeah, but I imagine you would text him to tell him you were sleeping over at a friend’s house, rather than going MIA. If my DH went out with friends and never came home, I’d be worried about his welfare.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If it’s any consolation I am a wife who has been staying out late at friends’ places (still coming home, but like 3a) and I am not having an affair. It’s been a coping mechanism for covid + a lack of emotional connection from my DH for nearly a year. After bringing it up multiple times I gave up and have been seeking emotional connection with my friends group (distanced on patios).

How has your connection between one another been recently OP?

Are you texting and responding to your spouse during these nights out?

This is a bad sign in a marriage. I can’t imagine my spouse and I hanging out with friends without each other until 3am.

We always were out in groups, couples etc when we were out that late- never alone.

You need to work on your marriage pronto.

Get into therapy, communicate...it gets worse the longer you don’t address it.

He has never really texted me during these outings. If he did I’d respond, though I wouldn’t be checking my phone constantly either. He doesn’t want to be there (prefers to go to bed early and keep to himself at home) and I can’t just sit around my house all night every night while he goes to bed at 8:30.

I’ve brought it up many times and have suggested therapy multiple times which he does not want to do. He thinks we are fine just different and have different routines. I agree it’s a bad sign — a symptom of our issues and as I said, a coping mechanism to deal with those issues — but I’ve tried to make moves to resolve it, but I’m pushing up against a brick wall.

My original point was not that things are just peachy in OPs marriage, but that his DW could be acting this way without actually fooling around with someone else.

[Anonymous]

Yup, she’s screwing around. After the guy busted her guts, her V discharged his bodily fluid into her panties... Better grab ‘em before she washes the evidence away.

[Anonymous]

Out all night routinely?



Call Jackie Childs - divorce attorney.

[Anonymous]

We got married right before Covid in December. I’m 31 and she’s 25. We had been living together for 3 years. Covid was tough on us. We didn’t seem to have much to talk about when we were home together. She was working remote from our home until the beginning of July and then went back to the office. I run a beer and wine store so have been working at the store throughout the pandemic. She has seemed really distant for the last few months.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We got married right before Covid in December. I’m 31 and she’s 25. We had been living together for 3 years. Covid was tough on us. We didn’t seem to have much to talk about when we were home together. She was working remote from our home until the beginning of July and then went back to the office. I run a beer and wine store so have been working at the store throughout the pandemic. She has seemed really distant for the last few months.

22 is young. You were 29. There is a world of difference in that timeframe for young people. Early-mid 20s is a time of such big changes. You still don’t know who you are. It sounds like she is still in a wild phase looking to sow some oats. Office affair?

[Anonymous]

Read her texts when you get a moment alone with her phone. Sounds awful, but it will verify everything. It did for me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DW does this several times. I trust her 100%.

DW has lots of her friends nearby and what is wrong with crashing at their place once in a while? It is a nice little break.

You need trust in a relationship. I cannot believe how suspicious you all are.

1. Certainly not in times of pandemic.

2. I expect my spouse to come home at a reasonable time and sleep in the marital bed, thank you very much. That's not too much to ask. Perhaps once in a while, girls' weekend trip, they all get a hotel or something, but frequently? No.