Is having 4+ kids a status symbol?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:God I don’t know how anyone can do it in this day and age.

I’m exhausted just thinking about it.

I know of 3 families on are rich close-in neighborhood with 4-5 kids and they do private for part of the k-12, usually high school.

The parents are very relaxed, able to handle chaos. The kids are great. They are some of my favorite people because they aren’t as competitive or suffocating with each individual child. The kids are very polite and resourceful.

Each of mine has a best friend from one of these families.

I came from a larger family and love the chaos, but my husband and I know our limits and anything more than 2 would drown us.

[Anonymous]

Or they hit the baby lottery and got multiples. Not a status symbol.

[Anonymous]

I think it's more a symbol of not believing in climate change.

[Anonymous]

In my area it’s a symbol of poor planning and overstretched exhausted mom.

[Anonymous]

45 year old mother of four here. We are upper middle class by any true measure but “middle class” at best by DCUM standards. Kids were born when I was 31, 33, 35, 37. Why did we have four? We had planned on three, and when the third was 15 months old, my husband (only child) decided he wanted one more. Our existing three kids were great, and we were surviving just fine, so we had a bother.

Oh, and I work for an organization that works to fight climate change.

[Anonymous]

We just have a lot of wealthy catholic families.

[Anonymous]

Our HHInis close to 600K and we have two healthy kids. Didn’t want to roll the dice on a third.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We just have a lot of wealthy catholic families.

I agree. Just look at the number of Catholic Churches and schools and their enrollment numbers.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Umm most of the families with large numbers of this kids in this area are depending on either the public school or homeschooling to educate their kids.

Hence the freakout that DMV schools are all virtual for the year. They didn't budget for the costs of keeping these kids at home or hiring 'pods' to help teach them.

When you can afford to send 4+ kids to private school for 18 years then yes, its a status symbol.

That is an odd comment since the majority of all families depend on public schools for education, regardless of the number of children.

For the UC or the truly wealthy private schools are the status symbols, not the number of kids (although you must be able to afford privates for all of them). KellyAnne Conway's kids (all four of them) have been enrolled in private schools their whole lives. Maria Shriver's four kids? All private all the way.

Shriver’s choice for have a lot of kids has to do more with her Irish Catholic upbringing than money.

Kellyamne also identifies as a practicing Catholic.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:In my area it’s a symbol of poor planning and overstretched exhausted mom.

I am sorry you couldn't have more kids. That must be hard for you to process.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Umm most of the families with large numbers of this kids in this area are depending on either the public school or homeschooling to educate their kids.

Hence the freakout that DMV schools are all virtual for the year. They didn't budget for the costs of keeping these kids at home or hiring 'pods' to help teach them.

When you can afford to send 4+ kids to private school for 18 years then yes, its a status symbol.

That is an odd comment since the majority of all families depend on public schools for education, regardless of the number of children.

For the UC or the truly wealthy private schools are the status symbols, not the number of kids (although you must be able to afford privates for all of them). KellyAnne Conway's kids (all four of them) have been enrolled in private schools their whole lives. Maria Shriver's four kids? All private all the way.

Shriver’s choice for have a lot of kids has to do more with her Irish Catholic upbringing than money.

Kellyamne also identifies as a practicing Catholic.

They’re both products of Catholic K-12 and colleges.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We just have a lot of wealthy catholic families.

Yeah go somewhere like St Luke in McLean (which was where Robert Kennedy and his 11 kids went).

[Anonymous]

In the mid-1900s 6-10 kids was common among Irish Catholic families. I don’t know if that is true today.

[Anonymous]

Everyone I know is either Catholic or had multiples.

I grew up in a UMC, Catholic neighborhood in DC and there were 4 neighbors with 4+ kids out of about 26 homes. Each family had 4, 5, 6 and 8 kids respectively.

[Anonymous]

Not sure it’s a status symbol but I do think there’s a correlation between number of kids and money, because obviously when you have more money it’s easier to support more kids.

We have one and I remember discussing whether we try for a second with our rich friends (3 kids). They acted like money was a ridiculous reason not to have more kids (“Oh you just figure it out!”). To me, that attitude really reflected their privilege. Only someone with a lot of money would be ignorant enough to act like more children would have no effect on your finances. Or to think you should have another child without even considering stuff like college costs or future housing costs.

So yeah, less a status symbol than a reflection of having enough money not to have to worry about this stuff.